Madonna of course stole adopted a little girl from Malawai last year, and this week the two of them returned for the groundbreaking of a new school for girls. Madonna is bankrolling most of this, but please don’t think that stopped her from looking like an elitist old cunt for even one day.
The average person in Malawai makes $160 a year, so maybe it was insensitive to wear 1000 dollar boots to christen a villages well. Her first clue should have been that they have a fucking well. If you’re someplace with a well, that place sucks.
And she wore a pair of 300 dollar sunglasses. Oh I’m sorry, two pair. From a new line of sunglasses that will be out in May called MDG. The ‘D’ stands for ‘Dolce’. The “G” stands for ‘Gabbana’. Now try and guess who the ‘M’ stands for. Hurry up and guess because I’m no good with secrets.
Jim Carey announced on Twitter last night that he and Jenny McCarthy have broken up after dating for almost 5 years. Many were surprised by this revelation, because it means that people are following Jim Carey on Twitter for some inexplicable reason.
Jenny and I have just ended our 5yr relationship. I’m grateful 4 the many blessings we’ve shared and I wish her the very best! S’okay! ?;^>
I’ m so grateful for the years Jim and I had together. I will stay committed to Jane and will always keep Jim as a leading man in my heart.
Jim Carey is an idiot so Jenny is screwed now. There aren’t many people left dumb enough to put up with her. Because she doesn’t believe in vaccines or science or dinosaurs or whatever. She better hope they never cure autism because a rich guy with that might be her last chance.
Sandra Bullock hasn’t said a word in public since the news broke about her husband whoring around, but the rumor of a sex tape – even though it’s the dumbest thing you’ll ever hear and the source is a fuckin idiot who clearly just makes things up – was enough to force her to make a statement.
“There is no sex tape,” she says in a statement to PEOPLE on Tuesday. “There never has been one and there never will be one.”
Until now, Bullock, 45, had not commented, remaining in seclusion since reports surfaced that James, 40, allegedly had cheated on her with at least four other women.
She spoke out in response to an online report that James possesses a graphic sex tape which he could possibly use as leverage in a divorce case.
‘Demolition Man’ came out in 1993, and ‘Speed’ was one year later. So Sandra Bullock has been really famous for almost 20 years. How many bad things have you ever heard about her? Total. I can’t think of one. Not one bad story or rumor in 20 years. Yet suddenly she’s a Nazi shoving guns up her ass? That sounds like 5 different rumors about 5 different people just crammed into one. There’s probably a longer version of this rumor where she pours AIDS into the water supply and works for the Men in Black.
It’s awesome that Red Letters ‘Star Wars’ prequel reviews have gone viral in the past view days, because he LOL’ingly points out (in a review that’s longer than the movie) that George Lucas is a retard who has no idea WTF he’s doing. ‘Empire Strikes Back’ is the main reason people love ‘Star Wars’, and that’s the only one Lucas didn’t write or direct.
And it’s a good thing, because when Lucas gets involved, shit like this happens:
In the latest attempt to wring every possible cent out of Star Wars, the head Jedi has announced plans to spin off an untitled animated comedy series that “will look at the saga’s characters with a playful and irreverent tone,” per Lucasfilm.
Helping to oversee the hijinks will be former Scoobster Seth Green, who’s earned Emmy nods for spoofing the Skywalker gang in his Robot Chicken.
“It’s crazy to think that there aren’t normal, mundane everyday problems in a world so well-defined,” says Green, hinting at the show’s premise. “What do these characters do when they’re not overthrowing Empires?”
Yeah, because that’s the interesting part about a Jedis life. The everyday stuff. The movies never really explained what would happen if Luke ever forgot his anniversary, or if Han Solo and Chewbacca opened a restaurant. It kinda wrecked the whole movie because I didn’t know.
Nicollette Sheridan has made some astounding claims about Marc Cherry, the creator of “Desperate Housewives,” alleging he SLAPPED HER IN THE FACE after she questioned something in the script, then fired her when she threatened to tell on him. No one likes a tattle-tale, Nicollette.
Nicollette is suing for assault and battery, gender violence and wrongful termination.
Sheridan is suing for more than $20 million.
Sheridan says during the 5th season, Cherry put her in his crosshairs. She claims on September 24, 2008, he physically assaulted her after she questioned him about something in the script. According to the lawsuit, “Cherry took her aside and forcefully hit her with his hand across her face and head.”
According to the suit, after the alleged incident, Cherry went to her trailer to “beg forgiveness.”
Sheridan says she immediately reported the incident to ABC, but Cherry’s aggressiveness only worsened and ABC failed to take action.
But according to the LA Times:
“While we have yet to see the actual complaint, we investigated similar claims made by Ms. Sheridan last year and found them to be without merit.”
In Cherrys defense, actors are usually idiots and shouldn’t question anything. Just say the words on the page, monkey. Of course that’s no excuse to slap her in the face. What a dickhead. Someone should go kick that guys ass. Not me though. He sounds mean. And I’m to pretty to risk.
As was first reported yesterday in a Tyler exclusive, Swiss models are attractive, and to illustrate this point pictures of Michelle Hunziker in a bikini on Miami Beach were thankfully included.
My claims caused quite a controversy, so today I was going to post pictures of me dressed as a Mathamagician for Halloween in the 11th I mean 5th grade. But then I thought new pictures of Michelle in a bikini might be more persuasive, so we’ll try it this way first.
Yesterday the internet was all ramped up because there was a story claiming Sandra Bullock had a super deviant sex tape with Jesse James.
It includes James smearing feces on Bullock’s upper lip during various types of anal sex, lots of profanity hurled from both parties, and a leather clad James, sporting a Hitler moustache with brown hat with a swastika, ramming a handcuffed Bullock’s asshole with a shotgun in his left hand.
Seriously? Are we being serious? Sandra Bullock. Getting anally raped. With a shotgun. And she filmed it. Seriously?
JOSLYN JAMES - is the porn star who thought she was in ‘Pretty Woman’ and she and Tiger Woods were gonna go to the polo match hand in hand. She “retired” from porn to hold press conferences to cry a lot and demand respect, but now she’s going back to porn. Mission accomplished! (nypost)
AUDRINA PATRIDGE - may have broken up with Ryan Cabrera this weekend after they had a fight in Vegas. “This is so typical of Ryan”, is what I might say if I had any idea who the fuck that was. (page six)
KE$HA - has a terrible body, so naturally she wore a zebra-striped catsuit for a concert in Palm Springs. Either that or it was a black catsuit that she was too fat for and now it’s ripping apart. (the sun)
GANJA GIRLS - isn’t relevant to be honest with you, but pictures of hot girls in their underwear getting high is oddly fascinating. If Northern California ever became it’s own state, they should use this picture for their state flag. I would totally move there. (how to grow bud)