Taylor Swift Almost Looks Sexy In Her Grandma’s Bikini

By Lex July 29, 2013 @ 11:15 AM

Taylor Swift Goes Paddle Boarding In Westerly RI
Taylor Swift may be a G-rated succubus spawn of the Dark Lord. But, as a man, I have the superpowers to look past her soul robbing merchandisable persona and think about what it might be like to knock around with her in her grandma getups. That could be a thing. Not a thing worth eternal damnation, but a thing.

Photo Credit: Splash, WENN

Brandi Glanville Shows Off Her Cleavage At A Bruno Mars Show

By Lex July 29, 2013 @ 11:03 AM

Brandi Glanville Shows Off Her Cleavage At A Bruno Mars Show In Los Angeles

Photo Credit: PCN

Ashley Greene Is A Considerate Daredevil

By Travis July 29, 2013 @ 11:00 AM

Twilight actress Ashley Greene seems like a very nice young woman, as evidenced by some of the photos that she posts to her Instagram account. For example, this photo and this photo both feature things that appeal to me and many other men throughout the world, and they make me want to see Ashley in more films that don’t involve really shitty acting and the least scariest vampires ever.

Yesterday, she added the above image of herself on a trapeze, and I’m hoping that she follows it up with a sun dress on a trampoline. Or a sex tape. Whatever she’s feeling up to.

Paulina Rubio Takes a Leak

By Lex July 29, 2013 @ 10:21 AM

A photographer caught Mexican pop star Paulina Rubio whizzing into the Atlantic from off her yacht harbored in Miami. Paulina was polite enough to give herself a little Atlantic clam splash after her tinkle. The paparazzo did what any man would do when he has a photograph of a woman taking a leak into the water — he blackmailed her. Paulina wasn’t playing that shit. She’s a gal who bushes it into open water. So she took the guy’s proofs and published them on Twitter to kill his profit potential.

El último intento de extorsión del Papparazzi, una mujer va al baño en el mar. ¿Qué es lo que vale?! digo nada!”

In case you don’t speak Spanish, that means, fuck you, asshole photographer. Also, another reminder to all of us when visiting America’s beaches and waterfronts this summer — don’t let any of the briny get in your mouth.

Breaking: Women Are Still Really Desperate

By Travis July 29, 2013 @ 10:00 AM

Poison front man Bret Michaels stopped by Fox and Friends on Friday to play a few songs from his upcoming album, “So This Is What It’s Come To?” as part of a tribute to 9/11 victims and first responders stuck in the 80s. And while that’s not actually the name of his album, Bret should at least consider it, because nothing says, “Walk into the white light” quite like being the host of a TV show about RV makeovers and performing music on Fox and Friends.

But at least one woman in the crowd was overly excited about Bret’s performance, as she threw her bra at the 50-year old, before he signed it and threw it back. Hopefully, Gretchen Carlson found a nice frame for it.

(Photo Credit: Joel Ginsburg/WENN.com)

Hey, It’s Anthony Weiner Pushing a Kid on a Swing

By Lex July 29, 2013 @ 9:23 AM

Anthony Weiner is just like you and me. He’s a guy who loves to go to the park on a Sunday and push his kid on the swings. Just like he loves to force his giant cock into your pussy and pull your hair for being such a teasing bitch. Yes, Anthony, we see that you see the cameras. Keep pushing. Dick.

Brooklyn Decker’s Dress Is The Best

By Travis July 29, 2013 @ 9:00 AM

Brooklyn Decker and Patrick Wilson were filming their new comedy, Stretch, in Los Angeles yesterday, and because I’d rather not make an effort to look up what it’s actually about, I’m going to guess that it’s a film about a woman with a ridiculous body that is forced to wear a very unflattering dress in public. And because the dress hides her incredible breasts, she’s really disappointed, because she’s wondering why no guys are paying attention to her anymore.

But then a gust of wind comes and almost shows everyone her crotch and she realizes that the dress was just right for her all along. The end.

(Photo Credits: JP/JFXimages/Wenn.com)

Courtney Stodden Sex Tape; Ain’t Like They Used to Be (VIDEO)

By Lex July 27, 2013 @ 2:36 AM

This is the so-called Courtney Stodden sex tape. No backdoor action. Just Courtney Stodden talking about how she wants to have tons more sex with grandpa and grandpa talking about how when he first hooked up with Courtney they had sex daily. You know how it is when you start banging a girl who just turned sixteen. The fire within. I barfed a little then got mostly really bored. And then waited to watch the loveologist hand them a check for pretending to be interested in the mindless cliches she was spouting. Honestly, couldn’t either of them have just plowed Courtney in the rump?