In a shocking bit of news, Courtney Stodden has announced she’s making a sex tape. Unlike even bogus productions like Backdoor Teen Mom, Courtney is taking a novel approach to her sex tape — she won’t be having sex in it. Or getting naked. She’s going to be with her husband talking about sex and examining play toys and working with that amazing loveologist friend of hers to to help other married couples. In short, she’s selling tickets to a zoo without any animals, just an old zoo keeper jizzing on a bunch of empty cages.
Just when we thought we’d heard the worst of Paula Deen’s racist shenanigans, it’s now come out that Paula asked one of her black employees to dress like Aunt Jemima. Well, like a stereotypical “mammy” from slavery days not necessarily the racist mascot for the maple syrup, but you know what I mean. In an article in the New York Times a former Deen cook named Dora Charles alleges that besides paying black employees less and dropping N-bombs all the time, Deen also asked her to act like a mammy. Deen was putting on a Confederate themed shindig for other racist rednecks when she came up with the bright idea of having Charles wear a gingham dress, red bandana, etc. and ring a dinner bell and yell, “Come an get it!”. Charles told Deen to shove it up her fat honky ass.
There are still people that think that Deen doesn’t deserve to have her celebrity chef career destroyed over all of this racist BS. Seriously? It’s not fucking OK to ask black employees to act like slaves. Why is this even up for debate? Because it happened several years ago? You don’t see that option on job applications. Have you ever been convicted of a felony? If you answered yes, was it a long time ago, in which case, no problem. Paula Deen might be a more enlightened boss now. But she never paid for the crap she did in the past. Karma doesn’t work on a tight schedule.
Here’s Aubrey Plaza in GQ. She’s in the new movie The To-Do List playing a good looking high school girl who wants to learn how to blow dudes before she goes away to college. I remember those girls from high school. I mostly just called them the girls who forgot my name and called me ‘loser’. Or, Tammy for short.
Photo Credit: GQ Maagazine
Back in first grade, a girl told me we’d be married someday. I told her I liked her friend better. She cried. I felt horrible. That experience still sums up my view on marriage. It’s a complicated business. But that doesn’t stop guys from saying ‘I do’ even as ten million years of human evolution compels them otherwise. These images of Kate Upton in her ‘wedding bikini’ probably don’t help. It’s easy to imagine marriage is all about having sex with Kate Upton on the beach. But even if you’re marrying Kate Upton you won’t be that lucky.
Photo Credit: Beach Bunny
Photo Credit: Marie Claire Mexico
Kanye West will not be charged by the D.A. for going Big John Studd on a a paparazzi outside LAX last week. Everybody got together and agreed that they hate annoying paparazzi even more than they hate Kanye. Also, Kanye did warn everybody to never talk near him or anybody he knows. All that’s left to do is for Kanye to write a fat check then keep on being the best baby daddy he can be.
Photo Credit: FameFlynet
Dennis Rodman is a real character. He’ll visit North Korea to meet with Kim Jong-Il. He gets Dennis Rodman wacky at the Mercedes-Benz fashion show in Miami. He probably holds several Pachinko records at Osaka area arcades. He’s a real bon vivant, if that terms means dude who travels around the world skipping out on his debts and court ordered child support. He so crazy.
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