Lauryn Hill Is Finally Recording A New Album

Lauryn Hill hasn't recorded a complete solo album since 1998's critically-acclaimed The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill, despite her claims that she's always writing new music. Basically, she's like hip hop's Axl Rose. But now, thanks to Hill's massive tax debt that she... read more

Kendall Jenner Does Instagram Well

The Kardashian's are never ones to rise above mediocrity or even to it, but they really knocked it out of the park with Kendall Jenner. Sure, she's only 17, but she's a product of her environment, so we can project how much of a fame whore she is going to become, and I... read more

Michelle Rodriguez Is Too Much Woman For Me

Michelle Rodriguez. Other side of that line I just drew for Pink. Michelle scares me like no other woman on this planet, save for my German dental hygienist, the girlfriend I accidentally cheated on who lit my clothes on fire, and my mom, who's kind of like a combination... read more

Pink is Glamorous

Pink is pretty hot for a dude. I don't say that lightly. Of all the girls who look kind of like dudes, Pink I think you get away with liking without your buddies calling you the next Jason Collins. It's a fine line between wanting a strong, haunchy, ruffian woman in bed... read more

Not Something You Want to See If You're Flying Any Time Soon (VIDEO)

Seriously, don't watch this if you're scared of planes, flying, about to fly, male stewards, or just generally an anxious person. This cargo plane leaving Bagram airfield north of Kabul seems to have had a dramatic shift in its cargo weight shortly after take-off (or... read more

Melissa Satta In A Bikini

Melissa Satta left Boston as a teenager because hot girls don't belong in Boston. City charter mandates girls in the upper echelon move out at least as far as Southern New Hampshire by the age of consent. She moved to Italy where her parents were from and became a big... read more

Now THIS GUY Has Big Balls

Sometimes it takes the plight of a guy like Wesley Warren to remind yourself how lucky you are. Wesley literally has some big balls. They weigh 130 pounds. Just look at those fucking nuts. This poor dude suffers from a disease called scrotal lymphedema in which your... read more

Anne Vyalitsyna Is In GQ Mexico

GQ Mexico apparently exists and I was surprised to know they don't feature Selena Gomez on every cover. They went with Victoria Secret model and girl who dumped Adam Levine, Anne Vyalitsyna, and truthfully I'm not that impressed. Is she good looking? Sure, but do I want... read more

Taylor Swift Wrote a Song on a Really Tiny Piano and She's Sharing It With the World

How gentle the lamb Taylor Swift. A pure soul driven to the music by divine guidance, to the dilapidated toy piano where she penned her first song about boys trying to stick their dirty parts in her special place. Boys who would all eventually disappoint her one way or... read more

Paris Hilton Was Born to Sell

If I told you that a blonde-haired lazy-eyed herp-ridden cocaine-addled heiress would someday become the world's most successful nightclub promotions pimp, you'd tell me, duh, that that was completely obvious. Nobody whores up nightclub openings better and bigger and... read more

Courtney Stodden Steps Out To Lunch

Courtney Stodden looks like her white blood cells are barely being held together by duct tape and semen after a 30 year Hall of Fame career in porn. That's obviously not the case, however, because she's somehow only 18 and everyone from Playboy to Hustler to Penthouse... read more

Gwyneth Paltrow In People

This is the photo spread People magazine got for inventing the World's Most Beautiful Woman title and handing it out to Gwyneth Paltrow. After Katy Perry got divorced People ran a big spread calling her the Happiest She's Ever Been, while Katy looked sullen, acne-flared,... read more