I’d never tell a woman how to dress. If I did, I’d tell her to dress like this. If you notice how greasy her face is you’re probably sexually fluid and should consider spending more on belts. This Owen... READ MORE

According to people trying to sell magazines next to impulse buy Snickers, Kylie Jenner is pregnant with her older rapper boyfriend’s baby. It’s not a complete shot in the dark as he’s been fucking her brains out since before... READ MORE

When Rosie O’Donnell’s seventeen year old daughter Chelsea went missing from their Nyack, New York home she knew her daughter was running off to meet some sweet talking dude in Jersey she met on Tinder. That is why 99% of seventeen year... READ MORE

Gawker spent considerable time and money wedding through the thirty million plus Ashley Madison records to find anybody famous. It’s not exactly journalism, but journalism’s redheaded stepchild, gotcha. They produced Josh Duggar. I hope for Gawker’s sake they’re holding... READ MORE

Nicki Minaj’s wax figure at Madame Tussauds in Vegas behaves a lot like it’s namesake in that it shows little emotion and is continually railed by strangers. Tons of people are posing inappropriately with the figure because it’s fucking... READ MORE

Lamar Odom is about two steps away from burning an effigy on Khloe Kardashian’s lawn before cutting himself and being led away in a straightjacket with bad poetry falling out of his pockets. The conflict the two had in... READ MORE

Subway removed a game from their website called Jared’s Pants Dance which allowed kids to use the now admitted pedophile’s pants to catch sandwiches to score points. Next time you feel like judging the Japanese take a look around. Jared may... READ MORE

I’m pretty sure Matt date raped me while I was sleeping off a bender just prior to the taping of the fourteenth episode of the Last Men on Earth podcast. Now I know what people mean when they say... READ MORE

Robert F. Kennedy Jr. took a break from urging parents to let their kids contract polio to publicly scold his teen daughter about posting pictures of herself drinking and partying half-naked on Instagram. A true Kennedy understands that whiskey,... READ MORE

Every women’s magazine ever has labeled Kristen Stewart as a beauty icon with model looks. Is this some kind of conspiracy among the horse faced editors of these magazines to make men question their own judgement. This needs investigating.... READ MORE