Hailey Clauson in A Bikini

January 15, 2015 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Everything about this chick strikes me as authentic. I bet she made these bikinis. Or at least reviewed certificates ensuring prevailing child labor laws were enforced. Look at that damn pout. She very well might have an epic pH imbalance... READ MORE

Chloe Goins Bra Ready to Convict Bill Cosby

January 15, 2015 | Photos | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Chloe Goins insists Bill Cosby CosRaped her at a party at the Playboy Mansion in 2008. Technically she claims she was drugged and woke up in a room with her tits wet with his saliva and Cosby sucking on... READ MORE

Naya Rivera Revels In Stink And Shit Around The Web

January 15, 2015 | crap around the web | editor| 0 Comments

Hot Latina Naya Rivera claims that daily bathing is just White people shit. She told the menopausal bobble heads at The View that “ethnics” like her only bathe every few days. That seems pretty nasty. If she had said I... READ MORE

Kendra Wilkinson Seems Caring

January 14, 2015 | Photos | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Kendra Wilkinson passed a woman in a mall parking lot begging for spare change and she one upped her by zipping into Ralph’s and snagging the supplicant a $200 gift card. Kendra made the woman promise that she’d never... READ MORE

Lena Dunham Marbles Coming Up

January 14, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Maybe we are the Great Satan. How else do you explain this shit? I’d go boom in a Belgian Sbarro outlet to make this go away. I’m offended on behalf of all the gods, including Vishtag, the Aramaic god... READ MORE

Lady Gaga Starts The New Year By Photoshopping Herself a New Body

January 14, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

2014 was the year of Lady Gaga pretending she didn’t give a rat’s ass she was getting chunky. 2015 is the year she takes it all back with Bikram yoga and Photoshop. She posted a photo to Instagram touting... READ MORE

Charlie Hebdo Post-Terrorist Edition

January 14, 2015 | crowd favorites | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

The post-massacre edition of Charlie Hebdo came out today. It’s Muhammad again being all ironic. Some small number of Western media sources are daring to show the cover and getting lit up on Islamic militant chat boards. Most are... READ MORE

Jon Jones Peaces On Rehab

January 14, 2015 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Jon Jones was caught with cocaine in his system after a random and probably unconstitutional drug test by the Nevada Athletic Commission. Jones immediately went to rehab where he stayed a total of one night. It’s unclear whether he has... READ MORE

Knicks Fan Not Winning

January 14, 2015 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Dennis Doyle is an unemployed lawyer and huge New York Knicks fan. Instead of seeking work Doyle is cashing in his unemployment chips and watching a ton of shitty basketball. He has committed to see every single Knicks game in... READ MORE

Heavy Chicks Be Artful

January 14, 2015 | Uncategorized | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

If you ever find something has no commercial value or ability to generate interest just slap some pretentious language under it and call it art. Nobody looks at that shit anyway. Kelli Jean Drinkwater is an artist who wanted... READ MORE