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Kendall Jenner Has Big Plans

August 17, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

According to RadarOnline with an accuracy rating circling Pravda, Kendall and Kylie Jenner formed a Grinchy idea to ditch the Keeping Up With the Kardashians show and start their own young tits-based empire. Somebody’s been whispering in their ear... READ MORE

The Today Show Got Super Confused (VIDEO)

August 17, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

dang @TODAYshow, just couldn't let her finish, huh? love ya @JanelleMonae! #BlackLivesMatter cc: @deray @Nettaaaaaaaa pic.twitter.com/QeGhY5lQGJ — marla york. (@theseMYtweetz) August 14, 2015 The Today Show wanted to cement their obvious kinship with the plight of Black America so... READ MORE

James Harrison Ain’t Raising No Wussies

August 17, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Pittsburgh Steelers veteran linebacker James Harrison snatched away his 6 and 8 year old kids’ team sports trophies because the trophies weren’t awarded for any specific achievement. Harrison’s big into the theory that kids are being ruined by meaningless awards and... READ MORE

Kristen Stewart Is a Survivor

August 17, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

When you start  with the premise that being super famous and having people leer at you in your local hipster coffee house is akin to the Holocaust, Kristen Stewart has had a lot to overcome. To promote her new... READ MORE

Obama Shares His Fake Playlist

August 17, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

President Obama shared his Spotify playlist nobody asked for after it was carefully vetted by pollsters and consultants and found to be the most broadly acceptable set of classic radio play music. Coldplay, Rolling Stones, Tempations, Justin Timberlake, and... READ MORE

Pam Anderson Still Kicking

August 17, 2015 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

I jerked off to this chick in high school. I’m now 78 years old. Pamela Anderson is the trophy wife you wish you’d divorced. And then remarried and divorced again just to cum on her numb tits while she... READ MORE

Matt Barnes Poked Rihanna

August 17, 2015 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Serial cock fiend Rihanna and the NBA’s I know that dude from high school Matt Barnes reportedly went on two dates. And he didn’t pay. That means they fucked at least twice. TMZ caught up with Barnes after he... READ MORE

Morgan Freeman WTF

August 17, 2015 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Nobody wants to feel victim to clickbait but when the New York Post rears its Alzheimer’s demo corpse and busts out the headline “Morgan Freeman’s Step Granddaughter Stabbed to death in Exorcism” you’d be a liar if you told... READ MORE

ISIS Also Islamically Rapes

August 15, 2015 | crowd favorites | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

In a not surprising revelation, the chief beards of ISIS like to rape women. Before the beheadings and the ritualistic tire burnings. Maybe sometimes after as well if it’s a Saturday and Allah’s been very good to you. The... READ MORE

Kendall Jenner, Hailey Baldwin And Pia Mia Perez in Bikinis in Mexico

August 14, 2015 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Mexico is sending us their rapists. We’re sending them our whores. It makes sense if you studied street economics. Kris Jenner dispatched Kendall Jenner along with Hailey Baldwin and Pia Mia Perez down to Mexico to chaperone her barely... READ MORE

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