Demi Lovato And Kathy Griffin Are Feuding Over Lady Gaga's Vomit

Kathy Griffin is 54-years old and has made a career out of shitting on celebrities, both talented and worthless, and Demi Lovato is 21, a popular singer and one of the judges on one of those stupid singing shows. Despite their three decade age difference, the two are... read more

Taylor Swift's Stalker Will Have To Try Harder

Taylor Swift recently scored a huge, relieving victory over her alleged stalker, Timothy Sweet, after a Los Angeles judge ordered him to stay at least 100 yards away from the singer for the next three years. Timothy reportedly believes that he and Taylor are married, and... read more

Riff Raff Wants To Date Katy Perry

Now that she and John Mayer have broken up again, Katy Perry is going to need to find a few rebound guys to date before she eventually gets back together with John, so why not start with one who looks like he just woke up on a strip club bathroom floor? According to... read more

Gwyneth Paltrow Ends Her Perfect Marriage to Gay Beethoven

Remember the early days when Gwyneth and Chris were young and in love and almost making eye contact with one another without morbid frowns? Yeah, that pinnacle of raw romantic feeling is over now. Gwyneth Paltrow posted on GOOP with all the grace and elegance that only... read more

Isabeli Fontana In Lingerie For GQ Romania

I read GQ Romania because I want to know how the gentlemen of Bucharest are dressing when the sun peeks through the industrial solvent clouds each June and outdoor activity is temporarily declared safe. Turns out it's mostly ill fitting suits made of unfiltered Camel... read more

Vogue Readers Impotently Angry About Kim's Cover Win

To see this coming, you had to be alive and have a functioning brain stem. Many loyal Vogue magazine readers who see the publication as the bible of fashion packaged in glossy commercial print were pissed that cash munching Hobbit mongrel Kim Kardashian graced the cover... read more

Kaley Cuoco Inks Betwixts Her Scapula For Love

You may recall that Kaley Cuoco's wedding to the 667th ranked tennis player in the world was so romantic, that people openly wept at their New Year's Eve ceremony. To commemorate the true majesty of endless love, the groom, Ryan Sweeting, got himself a large forearm... read more

Kanye West Mentors Teen Girls

Quite coincidentally, Kanye West has determined that one of the Jenner girls little teen friends, Pia Mia Perez, is going to be his protege he turns into the next Rihanna. This naturally inovlves spending time alone with her in the studio, working well into the evening,... read more

Kristen Bell Knows Stuff

Some people might say that a Hollywood actress who pays a fat woman to wipe sand off her belly might be out of touch with the common folk. But Kristen Bell and her consecrated vegan life traveler baby daddy have made it their mission to school people on the virtuous... read more

Puff Daddy Has Returned

Sean Combs has once again changed his stupid name back to Puff Daddy. That's the moniker he went by when we were first burst onto the scene back in the 90's by exploiting his friend Biggie's death for stardom. He made the announcement on Twitter saying, "For the record,... read more

Lady Gaga Says Women Should Submit

Lady Gaga said in a recent interview that not only is she submissive in a relationship but that other women should listen up to their men's commands as well. Gaga has been lauded as a feminist icon by the gay men and obese under 30 women that are her fan base. I'm not... read more

The New Avengers Movie Looks Good

By the sight of Elizabeth Olsen's hammer boobs, I'd say the new Avengers movie is looking pretty cinematic. It's one of ninety-seven comic books movies Hollywood has in production since they decided original films were too hard. I think in this one Hulk considers... read more