User since: 11/23/2010 22:43
Number of posts: 28

Last 20 pearl of wisdom:

06/03/2013 20:41 Adrienne Maloof Nipples Are Happier Than She Is
So this is what constitutes as a nip slip these days? Guess I just figured out why everybody was following ME around with cameras all day. I'm wearing shorts!

05/28/2013 15:26 Papa John's Delivery Guy Butt Dials Racist Comments To Customer
Bitching about $5?! Goddamn! How much are these asshole kids expecting these days? I typically give $3 if it's just a personal order. A party order, I've gone up to $20 before.

02/25/2013 19:14 J-Woww Gets $10K a Head to Herd Her Cattle to Vegas
You mean to tell me them titties isn't real? Worst news of the year.

01/19/2013 01:05 Friday Afternoon Headlines
I just want to see Mariah's milk sacs. But fuck Obama, too.

07/03/2012 20:59 'Jack Reacher' has a trailer
I just can't grasp Tom Cruise playing someone as badass as Reacher. Not to mention the size issue on top of it.

04/10/2012 14:56 Chevy Chase calls 'Community' a "mediocre sitcom"
Nothing But Trouble (1991) was cool, you fucking asshole.

12/13/2011 12:34 Brad and Angelina might have more kids
Doesn't have many friends? Look bitch, I'll be your confidant if you need friends. I'll be your shoulder to cry on, your dick to suck.

12/08/2011 13:10 are Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez engaged?
I'll bet that pussy is tighter'n shit. You know Justin's little bieber ain't givin' it a proper workout. More pics of that hussy in a bikini.

12/08/2011 11:45 making Britney diet is a good way to get fired
She may be 30 and she may be heavier, but I'd still picture her as the 18 year old "Hit Me" slut while I'm madly stabbing my burrito into her chalupa.

12/02/2011 15:52 why would Khloe Kardashian need makeup?
"You could find a sexier outfit for a girl at a god damn gun store." She isn't a she.

10/31/2011 12:46 Kim Kardashian was Poison Ivy
I certainly would like to throw my cocktail sausage down her ever-expanding hallway. That or just jack off to images of her tits.

10/12/2011 10:48 Sara Leal says she and Ashton had sex for 2 hours
On the downside, her clit is probably bigger than my dingus. On the plus side, my areolas are bigger!

10/12/2011 10:43 Sara Leal says she and Ashton had sex for 2 hours
1:57 past my record! That asshole!

10/10/2011 11:14 Paul McCartney got married
Wonder if he was smart enough to have the bitch sign a prenup this time around.

05/25/2011 13:43 Chelsea Handler had an abortion at 16
That's exactly why abortions should be outlawed, or at least left of for individual states to decide. Ending someone's life so they don't fuck yours up in the short-term is not an acceptable excuse.

05/23/2011 14:45 January Jones is sort of a bitch
Is that Lisa Loeb or January Jones? January Jones used to be hot circa 2003. What the hell happened?

01/20/2011 11:52 morning headlines
You see that shirt she's wearing? Ok then, so where are the fucking nip slip pics?!

01/07/2011 14:16 Kim Kardashian looks different
Michael Jackson lives!

12/15/2010 20:24 Julia Stiles is a homewrecking whore
I lost my boner for Julia Stiles after she banged that negroid in Mulatto Dance or whatever the fuck the name of that movie was.

12/13/2010 15:42 Katy Perry: camel toe or shadow?
Dear Katy, A pair of your slightly used panties is all I want for Christmas.