Mattyj2001
User since: 07/24/2011 07:57
Number of posts: 47




Last 20 pearl of wisdom:

01/28/2014 04:01 Grammys Misspell Dead Cory Monteith's Name
And Alan Myers gets slighted. Lame.

01/14/2014 03:55 Woody Allen's Son Is Unhappy
This guy is delusional if he thinks Woody Allen is his dad. Re: Beylerbey's comment above.

09/07/2013 04:01 Justin Bieber And Chris Brown Are Best Friends
That's no half-pipe, that's a mini-ramp. Poseurs.

08/03/2013 03:57 James Deen Says Sasha Grey Is Hated In The Porn World
Sly Stallone was in a porn and he turned out okay. But, uh, yeah, I think he's the only one.

07/26/2013 01:38 Paula Deen Asked Black Employees To Dress Like Aunt Jemima
Nothing resembling maple has been anywhere near Aunt Jemima syrup. Ever. It's 'pancake syrup'. Just sayin'.

07/04/2013 03:59 Remind Me Again, Did Courtney Stodden Get a Boob Job?
Did they throw in the surgery that makes your face look 30 years older?

06/08/2013 03:59 I Want a God Dammed Donut (VIDEO)
The trip out to Glendora to visit The Donut Man is well worth it. 24/7 donuts, and a window right next to the guy making the donuts. Mesmerizing. Krispy Kreme? I can't even ...

06/08/2013 03:26 The Guy From Sum 41 Is Doing Great
In an effort to come up with a good joke, I entered 'fat clown' into Google image search. I would suggest not doing that if you ever want to sleep again.

06/05/2013 06:48 How Are You Not Watching Nicole Richie on AOL?
I had an uncle that used to say he gave my aunt "A little bit of bob, and a lot of bang." I never knew what that meant. My aunt had a perm.

05/09/2013 03:58 As I Lay Dying Singer Wanted His Ex To Lay Dying
Looking for a hitman in San Diego? How about Tijuana, dumbass? This retard deserves whatever he gets.

05/07/2013 04:23 Charlize Theron Has a Stupid Haircut
She shaved her head for Mad Max.

05/05/2013 05:30 Ke$ha Writes Songs With Her Tits Now
I'm very confused. Ke$ha is suddenly ... attractive?

04/28/2013 06:47 Joey Fatone Tells Bieber To Stop Being Such A Douche
Does anybody else think "Fat One" when they see this guy?

04/16/2013 04:02 Banner Contest Voting Time
So, all you whiney people complaining about the banners, what the hell are you doing even looking at the banner? Do you actually end up on a website and wonder 'Damn, what site did I just go to again?

04/14/2013 03:24 Jay-Z Can Get Presidents Impeached?
Clearly, SigmaEW is an Elvis man.

03/27/2013 03:51 Ke$ha Had A Busy Weekend
Props for the Dumb and Dumber callout. Maybe I'm going nuts or I need new glasses, but Ke$sha cleans up nice.

03/27/2013 03:27 Micaela Schaefer Paints Her Eggs for Easter
You sure the first name isn't spelled M-I-K-E?

03/23/2013 04:27 Elizabeth Garner, The Perfect Cheer
Agree with Cpoy. Was on the fence about the new direction and tone of this site, but that was a brilliant punchline.

01/25/2013 04:24 Taylor Swift is a Disney Princess (specifically, Rapunzel)
Julianne Moore is actually a redhead, Emma Stone is not. I love Emma Stone but she has no boobs.

01/08/2013 04:55 BREAKING NEWS: Lindsay Lohan has bad parents
Best. Valentine's Day. Ever.