Digital Wonderbread
User since: 12/18/2012 00:12
Number of posts: 38

Last 20 pearl of wisdom:

06/18/2013 13:33 Courtney Stodden In Low Cut Gown At The Grove

The dildo that slides twice as hard lasts half as long.

06/17/2013 09:47 Chris Pine Has a New Hot Girlfriend

Dick Sheath. That was the name of my second grade Gym teacher.

06/06/2013 14:31 Joanna Krupa Squats By The Pool

He card read good

05/28/2013 10:58 Someone Threw Underwear At Lana Del Ray

so give back to Caesar what is Caesar's

05/21/2013 08:59 Anna Paquin Is One Angry Bisexual

Sarcasm and cynicism that isn't clever ... well, that should be your new tagline.

05/13/2013 21:21 Olivia Spauer Fired Over Bikini Pictures, Sort of

So glad you could bring your googling skills into this arrangement.

05/06/2013 19:51 Lindsay Comes Clean Before Betty Ford

I think the judge should play this interview in court the next time her attorney proposes rehab in lieu of jail time.

04/26/2013 10:22 Manti Te'o Turns to Fake Dead Girlfriend in Wake of Dramatic Drop in NFL Draft

Time to calibrate the fake blogger wheel of cruelty two notches to the left.

04/22/2013 11:08 will.i.am Has Justin Bieber's Back

This guy would make a terrible criminal defense attorney. "My client is not a murderer, and even though he had means, motive, and opportunity, he totally didn't rape the deceased until the room sta

04/19/2013 15:42 Just Ending for One Boston Bomber (Gory Death Photo)

I don't think he'll make it.

04/19/2013 12:34 Don't Say Innocuous Things About Murderous Nutjobs

Stick to celebs and tit pics, fellas. Your social commentary lacks perspective.

04/16/2013 11:51 Good News, Ladies: Ozzy Osbourne Might Be Single

To be fair seeing Sharon less will probably mean you will be a better person.

04/12/2013 10:43 Flavor Flav Is Looking At 12 Years In Prison

It's a shame he wasn't in Florida and didn't have a gun. He could have claimed he was standing his ground as he shot willy nilly in every direction. Acquitted! *Hi-Fives NRA*

04/02/2013 13:54 Thanks MTV, Shain Gandee's Family Can't Afford Funeral

Why blame MTV because his family is poor?

03/27/2013 09:23 Downton Abbey Actress Regrets Going Nude... Or Does She?

Socrates never published anything. Everything we know about him was published by his students.

03/26/2013 09:36 The Kardashians Are Probably Going To Sue Ford Now

Instead of suing Ford, maybe they should just not exist anymore.

03/22/2013 13:01 James Deen Is a Conniving Cocksman

No.

03/20/2013 14:52 Rihanna Is Serving Us, Going To Marry Chris Brown

What about the conjugal visit trailer? That's pretty fun.

03/20/2013 09:39 A Hacker Deleted All Of Soulja Boy's YouTube Videos

A notice to all future hackers: Don't forget to wipe out the backups too.