Abbey Clancy in a Bikini

By Lex June 09, 2014 @ 5:28 PM

Abbey Clancy Paddling Boarding In A Green Bikini In Maui
I’m going to spend my entire life bitching about soccer being a crappy sport. Meanwhile, all the soccer players will continue to get crazy hot women and not give a shit about people like me bitching about soccer. Jealousy is the closest I’ll get to laying on the beach in Maui while I watch the lingerie model I’ll be boning that night paddle board in to the shore.

Photo Credit: AKM-GSI, FameFlynet

Abbey Clancy Paddle Boarding In A Green Bikini In Maui

By Lex June 04, 2014 @ 10:02 AM

Abbey Clancy Paddle Boarding In A Green Bikini In Maui

Photo Credit: FameFlynet, Splash

Abbey Clancy In A Bikini

By Lex May 28, 2014 @ 2:59 PM

Abbey Clancy Relaxing In A White Bikini In Los Angeles
I continue to be amazed at the kind of women soccer players pull in regularly. It’s probably my American anti-soccer bias, but most of these hands-free athletes seem to be physically engaged to girls who look like top tier baseball player second wives. You know, not the first wives who helped them get through the minor leagues and lived in crappy housing and got knocked up once or twice. I’m talking about the former pageant girls and Hooters waitresses who swoop in when the major league long term deals are signed. The smart ones.

Photo Credit: Splash

Abbey Clancy In A Bikini In Dubai

By Lex April 30, 2014 @ 12:39 PM

Abbey Clancy In A Black Bikini At The Beach With Friends In Dubai
In my next life, I’m coming back as a beautiful woman. Sure, you’ve got all the pawing and molestations to endure as a child, but you soften that blow with a little Xanax and move on into an adulthood where you can pretty much do whatever the hell you want. Work, don’t work. Marry a professional athlete, don’t marry. Have kids, don’t have kids. Teen through forty the world is going to be your goddamn oyster. I’d probably drink a lot. But people will cover for your addictions. Pick you up and doll you up and make you pretty for the cameras again. There’s no monarch that ever had the power of a fine woman with a killer bikini ass. That’s who I’m coming back as. That or Randy Rhoads.

Photo Credit: Splash

Abbey Clancy Shows Off Side Boob And Butt At The Fashion For The Brave Photocall In London

By Lex November 11, 2013 @ 2:05 PM

Abbey Clancy Shows Off Side Boob And Butt At The Fashion For The Brave Photocall In London

Photo Credit: WENN

We’re Not Looking At Your Face, Abbey Clancy

By Travis October 24, 2013 @ 9:00 AM

Abbey Clancy was heading to her dance studio this morning, and she was in absolutely no mood for the paparazzi. She covered up her face and clearly expressed her displeasure at being photographed so early, because sometimes a sort-of-famous woman just needs her privacy and doesn’t want her every move documented for the all-judging eyes of the public. But then she started getting into her car, and I imagine that whole process took about 15 minutes, because when you’re climbing into that tall of a vehicle, you have to make sure every motion is fluid and deliberate, or a girl could really pull a muscle.

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