Some Very Attractive Women And Paris Hilton Celebrated Super Bowl Weekend

By Travis February 03, 2014 @ 10:00 AM

While you were serving up lukewarm canned chili and mildly-roofied Bud Light at your own Super Bowl party this weekend, the 11th annual Leather and Laces party in New York City was the perfect event for anyone who wanted to stare at the world’s most attractive women for two nights while not giving an actual shit about football. Alessandra Ambrosio, Adriana Lima, Bar Refaeli and Brooklyn Decker attended the party at Liberty Theater and probably made the rest of the women feel really inadequate, but then Paris Hilton showed up and the other guests breathed a collective sigh of relief. Hell, they all could have looked like someone threw acid on Rocky Dennis and people would have still been trying to figure out why Paris was standing next to the Victoria’s Secret A-squad.

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Adriana Lima is Such a Tease

By Travis December 13, 2013 @ 10:00 AM

How many times has it happened, when a young, attractive female celebrity has been dropped off to a fancy restaurant or a hip night club, and as she’s getting out of the car, she flashes her cooch for the entire world to see? Not enough, if you ask me, which is why it was so disappointing to see Adriana Lima show the women of the world just how easy it is to cooter-block as she was getting out of a minivan at her hotel in London last night. Fortunately, I’m guessing she wasn’t coked up and drunk, and that’s why she was able to maneuver her arms and hands properly. So it should still be only a matter of time before Miley Cyrus steps out of a monster truck with one leg wrapped around her head and two paparazzi already camped out inside her labia.

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Adriana Lima Back In Her Underwear on the Subway

By Lex December 10, 2013 @ 4:14 PM

Adriana Lima Poses For A Sexy Photoshoot On The Subway For The December 2013 Issue Of Numéro Tokyo
I guess this is part two of Adriana Lima rides a subway in her underwear while black folks ignore her in Numero Tokyo magazine. This seems like a rather failed campaign to get more Brazilian models to visit The Big Apple. What’s the point if you can’t even get a decent sexual assault on the subway? I guess you’ve still got the museums.

Photo Credit: Numéro Tokyo

Karlie Kloss Should be More Famous

By Travis December 10, 2013 @ 11:00 AM

Victoria’s Secret held its annual Holiday Cheer Gift event last night in New York City, and as always they sent two Angels to stand in one place for several minutes, while blowing kisses and looking pouty so guys will buy their bras under the belief that their girlfriends will instantly look like Adriana Lima or Karlie Kloss. It’s nice to see Victoria’s Secret pushing Karlie more, though, because she has that perfect girl next door look that so many models are lacking these days. And of course by “girl next door” I mean she looks like the girl who lives in my building and shakes a can of pepper spray when she walks by me each morning as a playful reminder that I should wear pants.

Photo Credits: Andres Otero/

The 2013 Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show Went Just About As Expected

By Travis November 14, 2013 @ 10:00 AM

If you were somehow able to wager that the 2013 Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show at the Lexington Avenue Armory in New York City last night would feature some very attractive women walking around in expensive lingerie, random outfits nobody will ever see again and gigantic wings, then you’re probably a wealthier man this morning. Erin Heatherton, Lily Aldridge, Alessandra Ambrosio, Doutzen Kroes, Candice Swanepoel and others showed off the company’s latest items that your girlfriends and wives will never, ever be able pull off, and then Taylor Swift even showed up to perform so that everyone could take a bathroom break.

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Adriana Lima in Fur

By Lex October 01, 2013 @ 11:17 AM

Adriana Lima In Lingerie For The October Issue Of Vogue Brazil
I don’t know how many minks had to die to get Adriana Lima to pose like that, but fuck, it’s worth it. I understand that some people who really love animals are going to want to toss buckets of paint or blood or the non-spicy salsa option at Chipotle all over Adriana’s fur coat. Which would be a shame. Because she’d have to take it off and be even more naked and desirable. Hot girls can’t lose. Be honest, animal rights crowd, that’s what really keeps you up at night.

Photo Credit: Vogue Brazil