THE HURT LOCKER - was (rightfully) named the best picture of the year by the Producers Guild of America this weekend, giving it some momentum heading toward the Academy Awards. Unfortunately it’s only made $12M so far. They should have called it “The Hurt Romantic Vampire”. (variety)
AVATAR - will become the highest grossing movie ever later today after it finished the weekend with a box office total of $1.841 billion, just shy of ‘Titanic’ and its 1.843. Analysts are surprised because ‘Avatar’ has done all this is less than 2 months, and also because the movie is kind of fuckin stupid. (hollywood reporter)
TIGER WOODS - was finally visited by his wife at his sex rehab in Mississippi. In fact she spent 5 days there and is participating in his therapy. When asked for a comment, someone more miserable than Tiger didn’t say anything, because they don’t exist. (radar)
HOPE FOR HAITI NOW - raised $57M Friday night with the big Hollywood telethon. You just know Haiti is gonna spend all that on weed. (us.com)
ALESSANDRA AMBROSIO - was in St. Barths this weekend for Victorias Secret. I heard that when you have sex with her, when you pull out your penis shines like the sun because her vagina coated it with a layer of gold. True story! (source = splash news online)
Victoria’s Secret supermodel Alesandra Ambrosio was in St Barths two weeks ago, and while she was there she twittered a bunch of personal candids. It’s a real tribute to professional photographers, because as it turns out she looks fantastic no matter who takes the picture. She could have thrown the camera in the sand then whacked it with a stick until it flashed and it would still be one of the most beautiful images ever caught on film. How exactly does one go about getting a job as a Victoria’s Secret photographer, because pointing in a general direction seems like something I could do.
Alessandra Ambrosio finally did some swimsuit modeling for Victorias Secret during her trip to St. Barths, and these are the pictures we’ve all been waiting for. And by “we” I mean, “me and my balls”. There’s awesome and then there’s awesome, and then there’s this.
If I were this guy holding the screen, even if a shark snuk up behind me and bit my crotch and then shook me back and forth by my crotch as his dagger like teeth sank deeper and deeper into my crotch, and then he dragged me away and ate my seemingly delicious crotch, it would still rank as the greatest day of my life.
Victorias Secret would be insane to go to St. Barths and shoot without Alessandra Ambrosio. But they’re not, and so they didn’t. Although the bikini pictures are her just hanging out with her long time boyfriend and the father of her child. At least I think that’s him. It probably is because Alessandra is good, and doesn’t whore around like some other famous girls. If Lindsay Lohan ever gets AIDS, she’ll kill more people than cancer.
Alessandra Ambrosio is still in St Barths to shoot the new Victorias Secret catalog, and just when it seemed she couldn’t get any more perfect, it turns out she can do this with her tongue. At this point it wouldn’t surprise me to learn that her vagina is lined with velvet, and has a mode where you can set it to vibrate.
(image source = fame)
I don’t know if you heard the news, but these are actual pictures from Heaven. It’s a real place. They found it.
(source = fame pictures)
