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hahaha, you suck ashlee

Yesterday Ashlee Simpson was beaming with pride as she posted a new picture with her baby on Twitter. Ashlees husband Pete Wentz wasn’t in the picture with them, because the night before his band had a concert at the Palms in Vegas and then he got drunk with dozens of strippers. "Everybody was going absolutely crazy," an eyewitness tells Star. "People were even drunkenly playing makeshift Slip 'n' Slide with a mat and...read more

afternoon headlines

ASHLEE SIMPSON – Page Six says, “Party animals-turned-parents Ashlee and Pete are having trouble … ‘(they’re) on the rocks. He is going out all the time and she's stuck at home’ ”. The story is way better if you just read, “Ashlee and Pete are on the rocks … stuck … in trouble … animals”. (source = page six)MADONNA – an official in Malawi says Madonna has filed adoption papers and will travel there this weekend for a...read more

ashlee is going to melrose place

I’ll never forget the first time I saw Ashlee Simpson on a TV series. She of course got her big break seven years ago on the WB series "7th Heaven". Just to be clear, when I say I'll never forget, it’s because I never knew it in the first place, because I have no idea what that is. So needless to say it was very wise of the new WB to hitch their wagon to Ashlees star once again. Can her follow up live up to the...read more

leave jessica alone!

Noted women’s rights advocate Ashlee Simpson has taken to her myspace to defend her newly fat and unattractive sister. Ashlee says: I am completely disgusted by the headlines concerning my sister's weight. A week after the inauguration and with such a feeling of hope in the air for our country, I find it completely embarrassing and belittling to all women to read about a woman's weight or figure as a headline on Fox...read more

umm ... hm ... interesting

Am I just seeing what I want to see, or is Ashlee Simpsons hair resting like a foot in front of her face. How monstrously big did her tits get after having that stupid kid? I mean, that awesome kid who I'm now a big fan of. If those are as big as I think they might be, she needs to take off that stupid coat immediately. Don’t be afraid to be sexy, that’s my motto. It’s why I wear a unitard to the gym, and a scandalous...read more

OF COURSE THEY GAVE IT A DUMB NAME

Ashlee Simpson welcomed her first child last night, a son, with husband Pete wentz, and was there any doubt these retards were given give the kid an awful embarrassing name? People says...Bronx Mowgli Wentz weighed 7 lbs., 11 oz., and was 20 1/2 inches long."Ashlee, Pete and baby Bronx are all healthy and happy, and thank everyone for their well wishes!" a spokesperson tells PEOPLE.That’s right. "Bronx Mowgli". As in...read more

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PETE WENTZ IS GAY

I’ve seen that picture of Pete Wentz on the cover of Out magazine, but there’s literally nothing on earth I have less interest in than Pete Wentz on the cover of Out magazine, so I never bothered to read anything from it. But it turns out it was sort of noteworthy because he apparently confesses to kissing guys on several different occasions. AOL says…In an interview with Out magazine, the Fall Out Boy bassist admitted...read more

ASHLEE SIMPSON IS GETTING BETTER

It’s not clear how long Ashlee Simpson has been pregnant (best guess is about 4 months) but she was at RenMar Studios in Hollywood yesterday in a flowing dress that hid as much as she could. Except for her now huge rack. Which she thankfully showed off. It’s a solid plan. As long as girls show their boobs people don’t really notice much else. She could have a woodpecker on her head and I wouldn’t notice for at least an...read more

PETE WENTZ IS AN IDIOT

You may find this hard to believe, because it's stupid, but the reason you’re looking at a giant bumblebee made out of legos is because that's what Pete Wentz gave Ashlee Simpson for a wedding present. No really. Splash News Online says…Pete commissioned artist Nathan Sawaya to make the "Lego Bee" which measures 26ins by 47ins by 36ins and is made from about 18,000 standard Lego bricks. New York based Nathan said: "I...read more

ASHLEE IS OFFICIALLY PREGNANT, BORING

The fact that Ashlee Simpson is pregnant has been the worlds worst keep secret for at least a month. The story brokearound April 14th, and after 6 weeks of cutsey little denials, she and her husband Pete Wentz finally officially confirmed the news on Pete’s blog last night. OK! says…"While many have speculated about this, we wanted to wait until after the first trimester to officially confirm that we are expecting our...read more

WOCKA WOCKA WOCKA!!!

Pete Wentz and his sexy new wife Ashlee Simpson left the house yesterday and walked around like this. With Pete wearing a paper plate over his face. Get it? Because I don’t. Suffice to say, it wasn’t funny. It barely even qualifies as stupid. It’s just confusing. But I’m willing to bet these idiots chuckled and snorted for a good 20 minutes before they stepped outside. "Are you really going to do it I can’t believe...read more

MRS. ASHLEE WENTZ

I’m sure you don’t care, because why on earth would you, but Ashlee Simpson did indeed get married to Pete Wentz Saturday at a ceremony held at her parents house. OK! says...Around noon on Saturday, the groom arrived via limo at the Encinco, Calif., home of Ashlee's dad Joe Simpson, who also officiated over the non-denominational ceremony under white tents.Big sis Jess, who arrived with on-off beau Tony Romo before...read more

ASHLEE GETS MARRIED TOMORROW

Ashlee Simpsons’ moms house in Encino, California is getting made over today to prep for Ashlee's wedding to Pete Wentz tomorrow. Many seem to think the wedding is coming together so quickly because Ashlee is pregnant and her dad doesn’t want her to start showing while she’s single. She hasn’t confirmed it yet, but everyone knows Ashlee is in fact pregnant. Which reminds me, what are the odds this kid will be able to...read more

ASHLEE IS GETTING MARRIED SATURDAY

Bored indifference is sweeping the nation this morning on the heels of Us magazines exclusive claim that Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz will get married in 5 days, this Saturday, May 17th, at a secret location. Us says... "Proper invites have not been sent out but instead guests have been given a save the date notice," the source told Us. The rehearsal dinner – described by the source as "an intimate affair" for "family...read more

ASHLEE AND PETE HAVE BEEN ROBBED

This has disaster written all over it, but monkeys stole designer clothes from Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz as they were vacationing in Costa Rica last week. Contact Music says... Simpson explains, "We'd go to sleep and we'd wake up, and the maid wasn't even here, but sunglasses, my Sony, my favorite Wireseal hat, all this stuff, my favorite make-up bag (was gone). We were like, 'Where is everything?' We asked the...read more