Ashley Greene’s Condo Just Burned Down

By Lex March 22, 2013 @ 3:12 PM

Residents in the building who live near Ashley tell TMZ … Ashley’s brother and assistant had been going in and out of the condo all morning. One resident says she heard glass exploding in Ashley’s condo.

I guess I have a suspicious mind, but this sounds pretty suspicious to me, right before a fire takes out the whole place, including one of Ashley’s dogs. Which pisses me off, because I love dogs. Even the bitchy little yappers Ashley had. Dogs don’t deserve to die because of stupid people doing stupid things.

I don’t exactly know how I can help Ashley out. So here’s some hot photos of her to remind you that it’s easier to feel sorry when bad things happen to good looking people.

16 photos in gallery >

Tags: Ashley Greene |

8 Comments

What The Crap, MTV?

By Travis March 06, 2013 @ 9:00 AM

America teenagers are really stupid (See: the success of Nicki Minaj and Justin Bieber) and MTV is run by people who are very good at taking advantage of that stupidity. So despite the fact that no intelligent adult has watched the MTV Movie Awards in at least 10 years, the network confidently announced the nominees yesterday of its annual celebration of actors who will show up to anything.

In case you needed a reminder that the MTV Movie Awards cater to the lowest common denominator, here is an actual clip from the network’s press release:

Keeping with the show’s tradition of celebrating current cultural memes, this year’s telecast will introduce two new categories. Abdominally blessed nominees Channing Tatum (Magic Mike), Taylor Lautner (The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 2), Daniel Craig (Skyfall) and Christian Bale (The Dark Knight Rises) will sweat it out against fan-favorite stuffed bear Seth MacFarlane as Ted for the crown of “Best Shirtless Performance”…

Best Shirtless Moments. Four guys. Shit’s weak, MTV.

If it wanted to attract more viewers – specifically males – MTV would give Olivia Wilde a lifetime achievement award every year and then just show her stripping and lesbian scene with Ashley Greene in Butter for two hours.

Ashley Greene has red hair now

By brendon October 22, 2012 @ 4:36 PM

Remember this episode of ‘the Simpsons’ where it turns out Lisa is really good at gambling on football but thinks it’s wrong so Homer tells her it’s like how ice cream is better with hot fudge and whipped cream and those crumbled-up cookie things they mash up, and Lisa concludes, “so gambling makes a good thing even better.”

Hot girls with red hair are like that. Ashley Greene is awesome; Ashley Greene with red hair is even better. In fact you may notice that some of these pictures of her in New York this weekend have a cloud-like halo around them, presumably because Ashley Greene is an angel sent here from heaven.

(image source = splash)

22 photos in gallery >

Tags: Ashley Greene |

10 Comments

Ashley Greene won the bikini contest

By brendon August 13, 2012 @ 4:48 PM

Ashley Greene looked absolutely terrific in a bikini yesterday after going paddle boarding in Malibu, and not that it even matters but she was with some dork. I don’t know who he is. It might have said his name. I didn’t even look, that’s how little I care. So if he were to have some sort of unfortunate “accident”, obviously I wouldn’t know anything about that.

(image source = akm images/gsi media)

56 photos in gallery >

Tags: Ashley Greene, bikini |

5 Comments

Ashley Greene is photogenic

By brendon July 13, 2012 @ 6:53 PM

Ashley Greene remains the one and only good thing to come out of the ‘Twilight’ series, especially since almost none of their advice about fighting wolves translates over to the real world. That’s extremely irresponsible film making. I could have been seriously hurt.

(image source = the august issue of esquire)

6 photos in gallery >

Tags: Ashley Greene |

48 Comments

um, hey there Ashley Greene

By brendon September 26, 2011 @ 2:15 PM

I have no idea what iHeartRadio is, or what the iHeartRadio Music Festival was, but it was in Vegas this weekend at the MGM, and they had Ashley Greene in a magic dress that made her boobs quadruple in size. Is there a festival for those dresses. Because I would be way more interested in attending that.

(image source = getty)