James Cameron will only make ‘Avatar’ movies from now on

By brendon May 07, 2012 @ 4:32 PM

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James Cameron has directed some of the most terrifically entertaining movies Hollywood has ever made, like ‘Aliens’ and ‘Terminator 2’, but now he tells the NY Times that from this day on he’ll direct nothing but more Avatar movies about the space kitties.

“I’m in the ‘Avatar’ business. Period. That’s it. I’m making ‘Avatar 2,’ ‘Avatar 3,’ maybe ‘Avatar 4,’ and I’m not going to produce other people’s movies for them. I’m not interested in taking scripts. And that all sounds I suppose a little bit restricted, but the point is I think within the ‘Avatar’ landscape I can say everything I need to say that I think needs to be said, in terms of the state of the world and what I think we need to be doing about it.”

Oh good because I get most of my news from ‘Avatar’ stories. Hopefully the next movie will be about the Na’vi getting concussions because the Avatars have some kind of bounty system, and I’ll find out if telling everyone that Junior Seau can rot in hell was the correct opinion.

morning headlines

By brendon February 03, 2010 @ 12:06 PM

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CONAN O’BRIEN - is one step closer to a deal with Fox, with CEO Rupert Murdoch saying, “If the programming people can show us we can do it and make a profit, we would do it in a flash.” Conan is real popular with college students, so maybe one good way to make money would be to have Andy sell weed out behind the studio. (radar)

JAMES CAMERON - doesn’t think ‘Avatar’ will win the Oscar for best picture. “I believe it’s very unlikely that we will win because I made such a jackass out of myself last time.” He also says ‘The Hurt Locker’, directed by his ex-wife Kathryn Bigelow, is the biggest threat. Then he added, “It’s good if you don’t mind watching movies in 2D, like some kind of stoneage fag.” (imdb)

LOST - This flight may cost more, but I have a bad feeling about that Quantas one. I don’t wanna risk it. (college humor)

SARAH HARDING - is a member of the UK girl-group Girls Aloud, and she’s been in Barbados all week modeling different bikinis. None of them were that great. In hindsight I maybe could have hyped these up a little better. (splash)

and the nominees are…

By brendon February 02, 2010 @ 10:44 AM

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The Academy Award nominees were announced just moments ago in LA, and what jumps out is ‘The Hangover’ for Best Picture, a category that has expanded this year to include 10 nominees. Also noteworthy is Kathyrn Bigelow (James Camerons’ ex-wife) for Best Director, making her just the fourth woman to ever be nominated and the first one that I kind of want to have sex with.

BEST PICTURE
- “Avatar”
- “Up in the Air”
- “Inglourious Basterds”
- “The Hurt Locker”
- “Precious: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire”
- “The Blind Side”
- “Up”
- “District 9”
- “An Education”
- “The Hangover”

The fact that ‘Precious’ includes ‘Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire’ in the title makes me wanna punch somebody. It serves no purpose, it’s just smug ‘New Yorker’ liberal “look how fancy we are” bullshit. How GD specific do they think I need to be when buying a movie ticket. I guess if i just said ‘Precious’, WHO KNOWS what movie I might end up going to. It would be pandemonium.

BEST DIRECTOR
- “Avatar,” James Cameron
- “The Hurt Locker,” Kathryn Bigelow
- “Inglourious Basterds,” Quentin Tarantino
- “Up in the Air,” Jason Reitman
- “Precious,” Lee Daniels

‘Basterds’ is fanfuckingtastic, Tarantinos masterpiece, and ‘Hurt Locker’ is the best movie of the year, but Hollywood has spoken; if your movie isn’t in 3D, fuck you. 3D 3D 3D!!!

BEST ACTOR
- Jeff Bridges, “Crazy Heart”
- George Clooney, “Up in the Air”
- Morgan Freeman, “Invictus”
- Colin Firth, “A Single Man”
- Jeremy Renner, “The Hurt Locker”

I only saw one of these, so I guess you could say I wasn’t impressed by the other 4. Therefore Renner wins.

BEST ACTRESS
- Gabourey Sidibe, “Precious”
- Sandra Bullock, “The Blind Side”
- Meryl Streep, “Julie and Julia”
- Helen Mirren, “The Last Station”
- Carey Mulligan, “An Education”

I’m a little surprised Zoe Saldana isn’t here for ‘Avatar’. She was getting lots of attention. It’s not easy to do good work under those conditions. Hollywood can be pretty shady but they should be commended for their color blind casting. A black actress can win any part and be a big star, like Zoe, Halle Berry or Thandie Newton, just as long as they have enough white features to not frighten the old people who run Hollywood.

BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR
- Matt Damon, “Invictus”
- Woody Harrelson, “The Messenger”
- Christopher Plummer, “The Last Station”
- Stanley Tucci, “The Lovely Bones”
- Christoph Waltz, “Inglourious Basterds”

Waltz is even more of a lock for this than Ledger was last year. Harrelson better OD immediately.

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS
- Mo’nique, “Precious”
- Anna Kendrick, “Up in the Air”
- Vera Farmiga, “Up in the Air”
- Penelope Cruz, “Nine”
- Maggie Gyllenhaal, Crazy Heart”

I didn’t see any of these movies but Gyllenhaal should win because then I can call her The Sad Cartoon Turtle some more.

Read more >

monday morning headlines

By brendon January 25, 2010 @ 11:22 AM

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THE HURT LOCKER - was (rightfully) named the best picture of the year by the Producers Guild of America this weekend, giving it some momentum heading toward the Academy Awards. Unfortunately it’s only made $12M so far. They should have called it “The Hurt Romantic Vampire”. (variety)

AVATAR - will become the highest grossing movie ever later today after it finished the weekend with a box office total of $1.841 billion, just shy of ‘Titanic’ and its 1.843. Analysts are surprised because ‘Avatar’ has done all this is less than 2 months, and also because the movie is kind of fuckin stupid. (hollywood reporter)

TIGER WOODS - was finally visited by his wife at his sex rehab in Mississippi. In fact she spent 5 days there and is participating in his therapy. When asked for a comment, someone more miserable than Tiger didn’t say anything, because they don’t exist. (radar)

HOPE FOR HAITI NOW - raised $57M Friday night with the big Hollywood telethon. You just know Haiti is gonna spend all that on weed. (us.com)

ALESSANDRA AMBROSIO – was in St. Barths this weekend for Victorias Secret. I heard that when you have sex with her, when you pull out your penis shines like the sun because her vagina coated it with a layer of gold. True story! (source = splash news online)

monday afternoon headlines

By brendon January 18, 2010 @ 5:59 PM

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MEGAN FOX - is not engaged to Brian Austin Greene, despite weekend rumors that she was. It was all a misunderstanding. A little torture and he changed his tune just like that. (wonderwall)

AVATAR - made another 41 million this weekend, rose to third all time in US box office history (‘Titanic’ made 600M, ‘Dark Knight’ 533) and is now an absolute certainty to become the highest grossing movie ever. Another absolute certainty: I look amazing in sung fit jeans. (box office mojo)

CONAN O BRIEN - is expected to make between 30 and 40 million in his settlement with NBC. Keep in mind that NBC fired him because they might lose around 25 million in advertising compared to last year. When asked for a comment, the other networks just laughed hysterically. (variety)

MISCHA BARTON - was at work today in New York playing a prostitute on ‘Law and Order: SVU’. You can tell she’s in character here because this is way better than she normally dresses. (splash news online)

monday morning headlines

By brendon January 11, 2010 @ 2:38 PM

Nicole Bahls Having Fun In Rio De Janeiro (USA ONLY)

AVATAR - made another $48.5 million this weekend to bring it’s worldwide total to $1.34 billion, second all time only to ‘Titanic’ which made 1.84. Both movies of course we’re directed by James Cameron and released by 20th Century Fox. They should give him something nice, like an iTunes gift card or something. (hollywood reporter)

MINKA KELLY - is reportedly engaged to Derek Jeter and will get married in November at a castle on Long Island. Ahh yes, New York near the water in winter. They’ve thought of everything! (popeater)

KATY PERRY - might be pregnant, and that might be why she’s marrying Russell Brand. They’re quite a team. Intellectually the kid will be somewhere between a rock and a lizard. (wonderwall)

NICOLE BAHLS - was in a bikini this weekend in Rio. If you don’t know who she is, maybe you should look it up. Then summarize it and send it to me. (flynet online)