Bethenny Frankel Is Infantalizing And Shit Around The Web

By Jack July 14, 2014 @ 12:49 PM


Reality skeleton and failed talk show host Bethenny Frankel set the Internet into a tizzy with a social media picture of her wearing her four year old daughter’s PJs and talking about how they could now share clothes. People started commenting that she was anorexic and needed to maybe eat a cracker or a pencil even for the minerals. But I guess those people forgot this is America, god dammit!

See the picture of Frankel that set off a thousand tweets (Fox News)

Octomom pleads no contest to being a welfare cheat. (Huffington Post)

Aubrey O’Day fake titties either got bigger or much bigger. (Hollywood Tuna)

JWoww had a baby that will grow up to be a doctor, or maybe a prostitute doctor. (The Superficial)

Nicole Scherzinger has sweet sweater puppies in her actual sweater. (Popoholic)

Irina Shayk looks totally wankable in lingerie. (COED)

Cunt saint Angelina Jolie sues The Daily News over an old video where she looks strung out. (Dlisted)

(Picture Via Fox News)

Bethenny Frankel In A Bikini

By Lex January 02, 2014 @ 1:57 PM

Bethenny Frankel In A Bikini At The Beach In Miami
If you’re not a stay at home menopausing mom, there’s a good chance you have no idea who Bethenny Frankel is. You may never have seen her talk show, unless you’ve ever seen a daytime talk show in your life, in which case, you’ve already seen her dribble. She cuts a fine surgically enhanced form for a modestly anorexic New Yorker in her 40′s. Although she does require the floppy hat to prevent the sun from revealing all her suture lines like the keyhole on Durin’s Day.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet,, PCN

Courtney Stodden Admitted She Doesn’t Read

By Travis November 15, 2013 @ 10:00 AM

On today’s episode of Bethenny, two women desperate for attention will pretend like they give a shit what the other has to say, as Bethenny Frankel scored the tell-all interview with Courtney Stodden that nobody wants to hear. In the preview clips for the show, Courtney tells Bethenny that she’s ready to take the next step in her career, which is apparently not porn, because she claims that she recently turned down a $5 million offer to have sex on camera. And she says that the rumors that she’s writing a book aren’t true, because, as she so elegantly told Bethenny, “I don’t read or write.” If you’re even remotely surprised by this statement, then you need to go to your nearest emergency room, because you’re probably in the middle of a stroke.

Nice Try, Bethenny Frankel

By Travis November 01, 2013 @ 11:00 AM

It wasn’t all charm and chests at Heidi Klum’s Halloween party at Marquee in New York City last night. Talk show host and slowly-evaporating woman Bethenny Frankel was in attendance and she made the very confusing decision to dress as Marilyn Monroe, as she looked a lot more like a 41-year old Lindsay Lohan dressed as Marilyn Monroe’s older sister. Maybe she chose this costume for ironic purposes, or maybe she really thinks that she’s young and sexy enough to pull off such a classic look. But if she shows up to next year’s party wearing anything other than hooded purple armor while riding Panthor, she’s just kidding herself.

Photo Credits: Alberto Reyes/

Bethenny Frankel In A Bikini

By Lex August 14, 2013 @ 3:49 PM

Bethenny Frankel In A Red Bikini At The Beach In Miami
Bethenny Frankel is all torn up over her recent divorce. They do say the death of your second two-year marriage is always the one that gets to you. Now Bethenny is doing what all great women do after failing miserably in their personal lives, she’s writing a book giving advice to other women on how to be happy. And skinny too. In her latest book, Skinnygirl Solutions: Your Straight-Up Guide to Home, Health, Family, Career, Style, and Sex, Bethenny offers up pearls of dietary wisdom such as:

  • Listen to your food voice, not your food noise
  • Make food moments meaningful
  • Don’t let good enough be good enough
  • Taste everything, eat nothing

Just in case these trite and completely unintelligible slogans may not get you exactly where you want to be shape wise, in later chapters Bethenny also offers up advice on removing bulimia vomit stains from your favorite blouse, blowing plastic surgeons so you can afford the good boobs, and making your face look like a gravely ill chimpmunk so that people don’t even notice your waistline in the first place. It’s practical advice from a practical woman who has faced it all, and failed miserably. Now, she’s ready to help you.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet,, PCN

Bethenny Frankel In A Bikini

By Lex April 22, 2013 @ 11:34 AM

Bethenny Frankel In Bikini Poolside In Miami
Bethenny Frankel is 42, has a little kid, just got divorced, produces healthy living books ladies love to buy, and has fake tits that look a little off-the-shelf but probably cost her a small fortune at a New York City plastic surgeon’s office. That last part I’m surmising on my own. The rest I know because Bethenny Frankel is a ‘reality star’. She shares her personal life. Back in the day, people who shared details of their personal lives were known simply as annoying oversharing chatty hens who everyone agreed needed to shut the fuck up. Nobody paid them much attention, let alone money. Now, it’s a career. You can peddle your perfect wedding story and your tragic divorce story just a short time later. I guess you’ve always been able to sell fake tits.

Photo Credit: Bauer-Griffin, FameFlynet, PCN, WENN