By Jack August 03, 2015 @ 12:00 PM
Real Housewife of whatever the fuck Bethenny Frankel is fucking gross. She looks like a Halloween skeleton covered in cold cut turkey meat. Who told her she was hot?
See the horror for yourself. (TMZ)
India Reynolds takes off her clothes just for you. (Egotastic All-Stars)
Ellie Goulding in a tight blue bikini is a very good thing. (Drunken Stepfather)
Selena Gomez in nothing but a towel. (Hollywood Tuna)
Guess what? Kylie Jenner is scantily clad. (Popoholic)
Who doesn’t love a good thigh gap? (The Chive)
Subway’s Jared bragged about fucking 16 year olds in his texts. (The Superficial)
By Lex March 31, 2015 @ 9:53 AM
Victoria’s Secret model Doutzen Kroes met up with the Bethenny Frankel skinny Ms. Potato head attachment figure and whispered in her ear, if I look like you do in fifteen years, I’m going to kill myself. Frankel agreed, then squeezed her ass cheeks to activate the hydraulic pumps that tighten the lifelike skin sheaths across her skeleton. Technology is pretty seamless these days. Someday, all women will have the opportunity to look like Bethenny Frankel in their 40′s. Inquire with your significant other if she plans on that option so you can start packing before she gives you a list of seventeen dates she’ll need rides home from the outpatient surgery center.
Photo Credit: FameFlynet
By Matt February 26, 2015 @ 7:33 AM
According to obviously promotional gossip leaked to the lazy media, the other Real Housewives of New York are pissed at Bethenny Frankel because she poses for staged bikini shots for paparazzi she hires but doesn’t go out of her way to promote The Real Housewives show or any of the shit the other cast members are hawking. I can’t blame her. Frankel is making a killing on her Skinny Girl line of anorexic products for fat chicks. She’s racing against the clock with about six more minutes to look fuckable before her face melts to a pool at her ankles at the stroke of midnight. This drama takes place on the new season of the show which you can check out over a yogurt enema at any given safe house or black site.
It would probably be the worst mistake of my life but I definitely still would. I’d even be a gentlemen and have the respect not to raid her Blackberry in refractory for Mark Cuban’s number so I can pitch him my idea for cargo socks or a backpack with a clock on it. What have you got to lose?
Photo Credit: INF
By Lex February 24, 2015 @ 1:45 PM
I don’t know how they keep this chick together. Tricorder readings show mostly shellac and Bondo. At some point there won’t be any human parts left and she’ll turn completely to the dark side. Which I think means more recipes for summer salads tossed with an unfrozen embryo vinagrette. Someday, we’ll all be having sex with lifelike androids and thinking nothing of it. Today, you have to keep banging on the panel underneath Bethenny Frankel’s hat if you want her to queef.
Photo Credit: INF
By Jack January 15, 2015 @ 12:00 PM
Gollum-like beast and Real Housewife Bethenny Frankel is developing a Skinny Girl weed that won’t give you the munchies. What the fuck is the point of smoking weed if it doesn’t make you hungry? But God forbid people eat solid food, right Beth?
Read all about this abomination of science. (Dlisted)
Charlotte Springer wears a see-through bodysuit for the titty-showing. (Egotastic)
Selena Gomez wears a bikini on Instagram because she cares. (Huffington Post)
Lara Stone looks smoking hot in Vogue. (Drunken Stepfather)
I don’t care about her shitty music but Taylor Swift has some fine ass legs. (Popoholic)
Abigail Ratchford is topless in lingerie on Instagram. Yes. (The Superficial)
Former WWE Barbie Blank wins Instagram with her titties. (COED)