Kaley Cuoco of Big Bang Theory, Bridget Moynahan of that one movie where Will Smith played a reluctant hero, Ashley Tisdale of some Disney thing I can’t remember, and Keri Hilson of I couldn’t even guess (I’m racist so I’ll assume a Tyler Perry movie) are all in the new Allure magazine nude issue, their annual gimmick so girls you’ve kind of heard of can get attention they don’t deserve.
How long have they been doing this? I’m assuming it began back before you could get HD porn online in 30 seconds, with girls who are not only way way hotter but more famous. It’s 2011. TOGTFO. It might as well be pictures of Mae West.
If you don’t remember, New England Patriot’s quarterback Tom Brady dated actress Bridgett Moynahan from 2004 to 2006, and got her pregnant just before they broke up. Then he dated and eventually married supermodel Gisele Bundchen. But Gisele makes it clear in this months Vanity Fair that she respects Bridget’s role as the mother of Toms child, so much so that she and Bridget live in the same town but have never met and Gisele says he’s, “my child, 100 percent.”
“I understand that he has a mom, and I respect that, but to me it’s not like because somebody else delivered him, that’s not my child. I feel it is, 100 percent,” Gisele says. “I want him to have a great relationship with his mom, because that’s important, but I love him the same way as if he were mine. I already feel like he’s my son, from the first day.”
This is what happens when girls are too hot. They go their entire lives without anyone telling them to shut the hell up and so they never realize that they’re dumb. But she would have been put in her place if she wore these shorts out this weekend, because I had mine on too, except mine lace up in the front as well, and several very satisfied ladies agreed that I owned that shit.
CBB exclusively broke the news last night that Bridget Moynahan gave birth to a baby boy yesterday in Santa Monica. The father, of course, is hunky New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady. CBB said:
Bridget had been almost two weeks overdue — Tom left training camp in Boston on Wednesday for Los Angeles, but no word on if he (and his flowers) made it in time for the birth
Damn this is better than genetic engineering. A super hot piece of ass actress and a three time Super Bowl winning quarterback. This kid is already an American hero. You might as well have gotten John Wayne to have a kid with the Statue of Liberty.
Friends of Tom Brady are apparently not happy that the New York Post announced to the world that his ex gf was three months pregnant. They say Bridget Moynahan knew a story was on its way but did not warn Brady that their personal life was about to hit the tabloids. A source says:
"Bridget didn't even bother to tell him she was going to go public with this … (she) may have gotten pregnant on purpose. She is 36, wanted a baby, and Tom was dumping her. It's a little suspicious."
A rep for Moynahan says their only role here was confirming a known story. They also say Brady was notified of the upcoming story. And in response to the inference that Bridget has acted unseemly, a source says:
"Please. They dated for three years and they broke up in December - right around the time he found out she was pregnant and he immediately started dating Gisele Bundchen. Who's the gross one here?"
Actually the gross one here is Gisele, who isn’t even close to being as pretty as Bridget Moynahan. Of course I rank women according to weight, and Giselle weighs at least 3 pounds more that Bridget. Fat bitch.
Bridget Moynahan is three months pregnant and the father to-be is her ex boyfriend, New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady. It will be the first child for both. Moynahan, 36, and Brady, 29, dated for two years before breaking up in December. Brady is now dating supermodel Gisele Bundchen. Because that's what you do when you're the quarterback for a team that won the Superbowl three times and you look like a model. You replace Bridget Moynahan with a Victoria's Secret supermodel. The only downside is that there's no where for him to go from here, there's no one more beautiful, there's no way for him to trade up. If he breaks up with Gisele, he'll have to start fucking diamonds or an Aston Martin. Maybe an angel or a sunset, if he can figure out how.
New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady (29) and Bridget Moynahan (35) have broken up after dating for the past three years. A rep for Moynahan said:
“(They) amicably ended their three-year relationship several weeks ago. We ask for your respect and consideration of their privacy. No further comments will be made."
This chick might as well go gay because no dude is gonna wanna follow Tom Brady. He won the Super Bowl three times, he's richer than most countries and he looks like a damn model. I made a list of the guys who have more to offer a girl than Tom Brady:
1. Bruce Wayne
And that was pretty much it.
