By Lex May 08, 2013 @ 5:36 PM
Every magazine photo is touched up these days, from a little to a lot. But if you’re Shape magazine and promoting fitness, you can’t just airbrush Britney Spears into a sleek specimen and tell all the fudgy gals who read your magazine to be inspired by Britney. I read lots of women’s magazines. I drink diet soda. I cried when Oprah died, I mean, I will. I know women. They love to be inspired and hate to be lied to. This is a lie. Bring back the muffin top.
Photo Credit: Shape Magazine
By Lex April 22, 2013 @ 5:07 PM
It’s time to stop judging Britney Spears by the standards of a potentially sexy pop star and start judging her as a soccer mom you wouldn’t throw out of bed. Even if she left crumbs and Fudgsicle® stains.
Photo Credit: FameFlynet, Bauer-Griffin
By Lex April 15, 2013 @ 2:50 PM
I shop at Ralph’s too, just like Britney Spears. They’ve got the best cupcakes, 12 for $3 with your club card. Seeing Britney at Ralph’s made me think of country baked ham. Which is also on sale this week with your club card. The real key is that club card. And Britney busting a seam.
Photo Credit: FameFlynet
By Lex April 02, 2013 @ 1:06 PM
Photo Credit: Splash, INF, FameFlynet
Britney Spears attended Easter services in her hometown of Kentwood, Louisiana yesterday and she looked awful. To be more accurate, she looked like her mom. On the other hand, little sister and five times divorced Jamie Lynn Spears looked pretty good in her way too short for church Easter dress. And, by pretty good, I mean, she didn’t look like her mom.
Photo credit: PCN
By Lex March 26, 2013 @ 12:15 PM
There comes a time in every suburban mom’s life when she says, ‘What the fuck, I’m wearing that bikini to the beach today’. I’m mostly guessing, I have no clue how suburban moms think outside of becoming moist over the thought of snapping up 100-ct packs of frozen Bagel Burrito Dogs at Costco or ensuring school counselors that their disaffected teens are not attending impromptu rainbow parties in the dusty garage where the auto shop used to be. But I’m guessing for Britney Spears it’s a big moment to whip off the clothes at Malibu down to nothing but a bikini. You know everybody on the beach is looking. Not to mention a dozen dudes with long range lenses along the bluff. And, when you consider the fact that not long ago Britney was locked in her mansion with guns, her kids, and a whole f-load of voices in her head, yeah, she’s holding up.
Photo credit: FameFlynet