Britney Spears gave two well-publicized “surprise” shows this weekend, one Friday night at the Palms in Vegas and one Sunday afternoon in San Francisco, which for some reason were hosted by Good Morning America as part of the promotion of her new album, “Femme Fatale”.


All things considered she looked pretty good. Obviously I think she looked way hotter, especially her body, when she was a teenager, but that’s really more of an indictment of me than it is her, and probably not the kind of thing I should be saying out loud.

(image source = fame)

Back in June, a bodyguard who worked for Britney Spears for about a month named Fernando Flores accused her of sexual harassment and then child abuse (for which she was investigated by the LA County Dept of Children and Family Services and cleared almost instantly because there was, “absolutely no truth to the accusations”).

And none of that seemed to make her throw money at him to shut up and go away so now he’s saying he has explicit naked pictures of her that he’s going to release. The Sun says…

Flores has told pals he will use the “filthy” snaps in court to back his £9million sexual harassment lawsuit against the singer.
The 29-year-old ex-cop alleges Britney hoped the photos would help lure him into her bed.
Last night a friend of Flores, who claims to have seen the pictures, said: “They are really explicit images that will shock and disgust the majority of her fans.
“He says she sent them last April when she was coming on to him on a daily basis. He left the following month.
“Some of the pictures show Britney with the camera between her legs. Others show her in provocative positions wearing lingerie.
“There are a few where she is naked, exposing herself in a way that she clearly hoped would make him aroused.”

A woman with two kids shoving a camera between her legs? Well I don’t know how they didn’t work on him because I’ve been hard this whole time.

After weeks of insufferable promotion and teases, Britney Spears finally released her video for Hold It Against Me last night (note: her record label is owned by Sony, in case that wasn’t clear by the 300 times you see the Sony label on screen).

It’s not the greatest video in the world or anything, and very obviously she’s not 19 anymore, but she still must look over at her old rival Christina Aguilera and laugh her ass off. The only way Christina could film a dance video these days is if you filmed it in space.

Britney Spears’ first single from her yet-untitled album due in March has leaked a day early, and apparently this is it though that seems hard to believe. Her singing and the music sound like they’re from two completely different songs. If you isolated her singing it would sound like a Camp Rock song. If you isolated the music it would sound like you were on South Beach, rubbing coke on your dick and nailing some teen model in the ass. It’s really weird, and a little uncomfortable to be honest.

The Sun says Britney Spears spent the day walking around a mall and crying yesterday. Maybe because she passed a mirror and saw what she was wearing.

BRITNEY SPEARS cut a despairing figure as she vacantly perused shop windows in LA yesterday.
The troubled star nibbled on her finger nails looking like a little girl lost after she was spotted leaving her lawyer’s office in floods of tears.
Brit hightailed it to the Westfield Mall after her traumatic legal appointment, but even the lure of clothes failed to lift her spirits.
Whatever went down within the four walls of her attorney’s place, it left the volatile Toxic star in a terrible state.

Well, in these pictures, the same ones they have, she’s not crying and she’s not overtly upset. So I have my doubts, but if it really happened then it’s sad. For the record this is also my policy about the Holocaust. 5 million? Come on.