Charlie Sheen is Now Less of a Terrible Dad

By Travis November 20, 2013 @ 11:00 AM

Now that Denise Richards has given up custody of Charlie Sheen’s twin sons, Bob and Max, because of her claims that they were beating the crap out of her daughter, the actor has realized that he has to actually not be a dick and follow the procedures of the Los Angeles County Department of Children and Family Services like everyone else, or he won’t get to see his kids again. According to Radar, since Brooke Mueller’s brother, Scott, now has custody of the kids that Charlie still won’t nut up and take care of himself, the actor has decided to cooperate with Family Services so he can continue to hang out with his kids every once in a while.

Otherwise, someone else is going to have to tell them about all of the porn stars he’s nailing, and only Charlie can really capture the magic in describing what a coked up orgy is all about.

Photo Credit: Getty

Denise Richards Can No Longer Handle The Violent Sheen Twins

By Lex November 06, 2013 @ 4:04 PM

Brooke Mueller And Sons At The 18th Dream Halloween Benefit In Los Angeles
If only crack and meth pipes came with fancy warning labels like family friendly tobacco, maybe the Sheen twins wouldn’t be four-year old future Natural Born Killers. Charlie Sheen’s ex-wife Denise Richards took custody of winning Charlie’s twin boys by way of convicted drug fiend Brooke Mueller earlier this year when both bio parents were deemed unfit by the County. Now Denise Richards is surrendering custody of the preschool aged twins because of claims of their already violent and anti-social behavior. Some of the shit Denise claims in her letter to Children and Family Services Department is straight out of the Damien playbook.

Bob and Max Sheen often go into a “zombie-like state,” and often kick and squeeze her pets violently for fun. The four-year-olds have reportedly said they “wanted to hurt and kill” the dogs.

[Denise] Richards’ daughters have been “kicked in the head and stomach, in addition to suffering scratches, bites, punches and spitting from the twins.

Bob Sheen in particular has “slapped a teacher in the face.”

I don’t know, they just sound like two playful little scamps. We’ve so neutered boyhood in this society, that some Puckish twins can’t punch their half sisters in the head any longer without a government official stepping in. Maybe the boys just need a change of venue. Perhaps something more rural like an honor ranch or the Hall of Doom in Slaughter Swamp.

Photo Credit: WENN

Charlie Sheen Finally Graduated High School (VIDEO)

By Travis September 12, 2013 @ 10:00 AM







Charlie Sheen lives in a mansion with several decent-looking female porn stars that he rotates in and out as he sees fit, while he collects paychecks on a 100-episode deal for Anger Management, despite the fact that he never even deserved it in the first place after his hilariously shameless public meltdown that included rants against his ex-showrunner and a standup comedy tour that proved he’s not funny. He’s basically living the American Dream.

It also shouldn’t really surprise anyone that on top of that, he never even graduated high school, but Jay Leno finally took care of that on the Tonight Show, so the guy who shouldn’t even be working in Hollywood is now at least qualified to work at McDonald’s.

Charlie Sheen Thinks That He Looks 28

By Travis September 02, 2013 @ 10:00 AM

After of a brief period of semi-normalcy, during which Charlie Sheen seemed to be the most grounded and sane person in his life (at least compared to Brooke Mueller), the actor jumped back on the porn wagon by allowing a new team of porn star “Angels” to move in with him. While Capri Anderson was nowhere to be seen, Charlie celebrated his upcoming 48th birthday with Celeste Star, Jana Jordan and Jayme “Motherfucking” Langford and then tweeted the above photo with the declaration that he looks 28.

Look, it’s hard to fault the guy who was brilliant enough to somehow turn the mostly unfunny and unoriginal Anger Management into a $150 million payday, but he looks 28 like Lindsay Lohan looks 27.

Charlie Sheen’s Porn Star “Angels” Are Back

By Lex August 07, 2013 @ 3:28 PM

Jana Jordan, Jayme Langford And Celeste Star Twitter Photo
Charlie Sheen kind of announced the reformation of his Angels pussy posse. Who wasn’t excited a couple years back by the first incarnation of simple-brained porn stars living in Charlie’s mansion, tracking high heel shoe prints through the perma-layer of cocaine dust along the floor. It was even more amusing when they all turned on Charlie in the media, spilling out all of his deviant secrets. The thing about hookers and porn stars, they’re great, but you don’t invite them into your home. Then the devil owns you.

Photo Credit: Getty, WENN, Twitter

Charlie Sheen Is Living With Two Porn Stars Again

By Travis August 06, 2013 @ 11:00 AM

The last time that Anger Management star Charlie Sheen lived with multiple porn stars, he was fired from his hit TV show before taking his ridiculous personal meltdown on an American comedy tour so people could laugh at him for trying to be funny. Will that be the case again now that two new porn stars have moved in with Sheen? Probably. Actors don’t ever learn shit.

According to Radar Online, Sheen’s newest “goddesses” are porn stars Georgia Jones and Capri Anderson (above), with the latter being the same girl who was found naked and screaming in a hotel room closet back in 2010 after Sheen allegedly attacked her while trashing the room. Her father must be very proud, if he even knows who she is or isn’t dead.

Photo Credit: Getty, WENN