By brendon August 30, 2011 @ 1:04 PM
If a girl is at a party and she goes into a bathroom stall with a guy, it’s either to have sex or do drugs. I can’t even think of a third option. But maybe Chelsea Handler can because security threw her out of a party in New York after finding her in one.
The New York Post says…
Handler attended the party for Standard Hotel employees on the restored boat in the Hudson River
…a bouncer caught her and “a dude with gold shoes” in a stall in the men’s bathroom and ushered them both out.
Uh, I was kind of hoping for some more details there New York Post, so if anyone sees Michael Johnson or the country bunny, ask them what they were doing in a bathroom stall with Chelsea Handler.
‘Friends’ went on the air in 1994, which means that Jennifer Aniston has been a big star for 17 years now, so it’s no surprise that a parade of Hollywood royalty packed the stage yesterday when Aniston was honored with a handprint ceremony at the famous Grauman’s Chinese Theatre in Hollywood.
From Chelsea Handler to Jason Bateman, it was a cavalcade of her friends and co-stars spanning almost two decades in show business!
(NOTE: actually it was just Chelsea Handler and Jason Bateman, who co-stars with Aniston in ‘Horrible Bosses’, which opens today. Oh and her newly shaven boyfriend Justin Theroux was there. And universally despised director Brett Ratner, who is a producer for ‘Horrible Bosses’. But no Courteney Cox or anyone from ‘Friends’, or Jim Carey or Adam Sandler or anyone like that. Maybe they didn’t go because they assumed they’d have to carry her just like they did when they worked together, and cement is really heavy.)
Chelsea Handler is on the new issue of ‘Hamptons’ magazine, and yesterday they had a Memorial Day party to premiere it. And they had the real Chelsea stand next to the “Chelsea” on the cover of their magazine.
I don’t think someone really thought this through.
(image source = wenn)
I’m still not sure if I like Chelsea Handler, because if she’s friends with Jennifer Aniston how cool could she really be, but her interview in the New York Times is certainly helping.
Not only does she condemn bullshit like the “teen mom” craze, but she says she had an abortion when she was 16, and then punctuates that by saying it was the right thing to do.
“People are too P.C.,” she said. “We need to be focusing on other things. We’re seeking out such grossness in human behavior and want such mindless entertainment. ‘The Real Housewives of Atlanta’ and some of these other shows are more racist. Or ‘16 and Pregnant.’ Getting rewarded for being pregnant when you’re a teenager? Are you serious? I mean, that makes me want to kill somebody.”
She continued: “I had an abortion when I was 16. Because that’s what I should have done. Otherwise I would now have a 20-year-old kid. Anyway, those are things that people shouldn’t be dishonest about it.”
I literally agree with every single thing she just said. 16-year-olds who get abortions are heroes. Wanting to have a baby at 16 is proof you’re too dumb to have a baby. All these shows are just different ways to select the dumbest cunts in the country and then film them. Culturally, it’s one step above a show where retards race stroke victims in supercross.
TOM SIZEMORE – has been questioned by the LAPD about the disappearance of a 25-year-old girl named Megan Wren. Police think Sizemore might know something because he was friends with the girl, perhaps her boyfriend, and also because he’s genuinely crazy. Really, they should question him anytime anyone goes missing, whether he knew them or not. (e!, lapd missing persons blog)
CHELSEA HANDLER – made a seemingly harmless joke about Kirstie Alley being fat, and that’s apparently mean, despite the fact that Kirstie Alley is really fat. Are we all supposed to pretend like she isn’t? Screw that, she’s a monster. If she died today I wouldn’t know whether to call the coroner or a taxidermist. (popeater)
X-MEN FIRST CLASS – has their first movie clip up, with Charles Xavier and Mystique in a meeting at the CIA. Then some X-Menning goes on, and then Charles asks, “How’s that for a magic trick?” And the answer is, “Not very good”, because we saw how the girl did it. (yahoo)
GWYNETH PALTROW – decided her chest plate was sexy and showed it off last night in London at the National Movie Awards. If she were as pale as she normally is she’d look like a racquetball wall in a dress. (getty)
By brendon December 22, 2010 @ 4:49 PM
When we last saw Jennifer Aniston, she was pouting (shocking, I know) about Chelsea Handler calling Angelina Jolie a “cunt”, immediately after Handler and Aniston went on vacation together. Apparently Aniston thought everyone would assume they spent the vacation trashing Angelina. And 10 points to Aniston, because she was correct, and that is in fact what everyone thinks.
Now, Popeater says Aniston has done what she does best: excruciating amounts of soul searching followed by feeling sorry for herself.
“Jen and Chelsea haven’t officially fallen out but they certainly won’t be going on vacation together for a long time unless Chelsea promises to never talk about Angelina again,” a friend of Chelsea’s tells me. “She understands that what Chelsea did was out of loyalty, but it didn’t help. In fact, it made things worse.”
“Jen is a very private person. It’s one thing to crash Angelina in private; it’s another to do it in public. Chelsea should have known better and is feeling Jen’s cold shoulder for her mistake.”
No, Jen is not a very private person. That’s why we’re still talking about this. Because she cried about Brad Pitt Brad Pitt Brad Pitt to anyone who would listen for 5 years. You could record every single word Pitt says for an entire year, and if you didn’t know any better, you’d swear he’d never even met Jennifer Ansiton.