rihanna might have chosen another chris brown

By brendon January 21, 2010 @ 5:17 PM

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Girls take it personally when you punch them in the face a dozen times like Chris Brown did to Rihanna last February, so she left him, eventually. Things seemed to be picking up for her just a few weeks ago, when she was seen in Mexico with Matt Kemp of the LA Dodgers. He has to be better than Brown, right? Um, well…

a Star investigation reveals that Matt has been accused of having his own anger management issues, including violence toward women.
In June 2008, actress Felisha Terrell filed a restraining order against the 6’4″, 220-lb. ballplayer accusing him of threatening, intimidating and stalking her. “He is violent and I am afraid.”
Rihanna’s friends are afraid, too.
“You’d think after what she went through with Chris, RiRi would be extra careful … It’s almost as if she has a dark side, an attraction to bad boys.”

They say people can do this sort of thing. If Rihanna is attracted to angry, abusive guys, she’ll find and date an angry, abusive guy, even though by all outward appearances he seems perfectly normal. The same way girls with low-self esteem can identify and latch on to sexual predators all too eager to take advantage of that (*).

(*) “don’t I know it, heh-heh-heh”

rihanna and her new man are getting close

By brendon January 07, 2010 @ 11:16 AM

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It would have been a lot more interesting if the Mexican Super Mario (as seen above) was Rihannas new lover, and they were gettin it on during their vacation in Cabo, but I don’t think he’s the one. I think it’s that bo’d up black dude. He sort of looks like Chris Brown to be honest. And I don’t mean that in a, “all black guys look alike” kind of way, I just mean … um. No actually that is how I meant it. Seriously why do so many black guys look alike?

(source = splash news online)

thursday afternoon headlines

By brendon November 19, 2009 @ 8:11 PM

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Todays headlines are sponsored by Barney, the fattest Dalmatian in England. He’s not the fattest black and white mix breed in England though. Hint hint, Mariah Carey. (barney pix here and here and here. source = splash)

DAVID FINCHER – was called in to create a menu screen for the BluRay release of ‘Fight Club’, so he copied the one from ‘Never Been Kissed’ starring Drew Barrymore. He meant it as a joke, but they do have things in common. They both make me want to punch someone, for example. (yahoo)

CHRIS BROWN – is struggling to fill even small venues during his comeback tour, and scalpers outside are selling tickets below cost. Maybe because lyrics like “babe pretty thick, that need to be hit” seem more threatening than sexy now. That’s either about a pretty girl he’d like to make love to, or a slow learner who needs a little reminding. (ny daily news)

BRAD PITT - turned down a $5M appearance fee and a trip to the United Arab Emirates because it was on Oct. 31st, and he wanted to go out with his kids on Halloween. What I’m trying to say is, Brad Pitt is an idiot. (msnbc)

BEHATI PRISLOO – is a pro. The model shot for Victorias Secret in New York today, and notice how everyone else is all bundled up and she’s essentially naked. Bullshit like this is why I got out of swimsuit modeling. (inf daily)

monday afternoon headlines

By brendon November 09, 2009 @ 6:32 PM

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AVATAR – will have cost around $500 million when it hits screens next month, so it’s already breaking records as the most expensive movie ever made, and the one people most regret investing in. WTF is this nonsense? (la times)

RIHANNA
– is a little tattle-tale, according to Chris Brown, who thinks she should have kept her mouth shut after he punched her in the face a few dozen times. Instead she went and narked.  That’s fucked up. He trusted her, and she betrayed that. What a bitch. (the sun)

BRITNEY SLAMMED DOWN UNDER – is without question the laziest suggestive headline ever written. (the sun)

LINDSAY LOHAN – was seen outside Crow in West Hollywood crying as she left Friday night. Probably because they ran out of cocaine. (star)

RAMPAGE JACKSON – was on set to film for ‘The A-Team’ in Vancouver today. Here the stuntman for Jacksons character ‘BA Baracus’ is going down the side of a building for some reason. Maybe ‘cause he didn’t have no time fo’ no jibba-jabba. (inf)

very bad is getting very worse for chris brown

By brendon November 06, 2009 @ 12:13 PM

Stuff about Rihannas GMA interview, which is uncut tonight on 20/20, should have been up yesterday but this is depressing. And part 2 this morning got even worse. Here she talks about what actually happened in the car when he started hitting her. And if that wasn’t bad enough, spell check recommends “rhinos” when you misspell “Rihanna”. That shit is racist!

Yesterday she admitted she did go back to Brown “eight or nine times” even after he beat her, but finally ended it because she was so embarrassed at the prospect of staying with someone who had done this to her.

There’s simply no way this could be any worse for Brown. If she had been cursing him out and saying she wants to kill him, he could say “I told you that bitch was crazy”. But here she looks heartbroken. Not because she got beat up but because she really loved him and now she can’t be with him. Brown is fucked. This makes him look even worse. His only hope was she would go on there and act like the black woman in Jerry Bruckheimer movies, the kind at a fast food counter in a sky blue church outfit and a big hat with feathers, yelling at the kid behind the counter about respect because they ran out of biscuits.

thursday afternoon headlines

By brendon November 05, 2009 @ 7:53 PM

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DAVID LETTERMAN – is now a woman. Or at least will be during the ‘Law and Order’ episode about a talk show host who gets blackmailed after having affairs with members of her staff.  I know what you’re thinking. “Wow this post got surprisingly boring considering it started out by saying ‘David Letterman is now a woman.’”  Yeah sorry about that.  (e! online)

JON GOSSELIN – is so screwed. The law firm representing TLC in their breach of contract lawsuit against him have deposed his gf, his bodyguards, and even his former lawyers to find out if he was earning money from outside appearances. This moron is so done. TLC might as well coat him in honey and throw him in a bear cage too.  (radar)

JAMES GANDOLFINI – punched a photographer trying to videotape him shopping in the West Village.  And it would have hurt too, except that Gandolfini is a fat tub of shit and actors are all pussies.  (huffington)

CHRIS BROWN – will run his comeback “Fan Appreciation” tour through a series of small and intimate venues, starting with the House of Blues in Houston next week. So far ticket sales have been steady. Because there’s nothing more steady than “zero”. (daily news)

DENISE MILANI – is here dressed as Wonder Woman because these headlines were all kind of boring. Her costume is a little different from the original, but she still has the golden lasso and the bulletproof bracelets. Know what else is bulletproof? My dick right now. (denisemilani.com)