Chris Hemsworth’s Wife Is On the Jealous Side

By Lex December 11, 2013 @ 6:06 PM

I don’t know why this story bothers me so much. I think it’s the sadness sweeping over me knowing that even successful Hollywood actors who could nail any woman end up married to a woman who vagina lashes all the fun out of them. That’s metaphysical angst or something. Natalie Portman was passing around a cutesy tidbit last week about how her steamy porn kissing scene with Chris Hemsworth in Thor 2: We’ve Run Out of Fucking Ideas, wasn’t really her in the scene. It was Chris’ wife, Elsa Pataky. Natalie made up some bullshit excuse about how she had a scheduling conflict during the very day they were shooting the romantic scene, and Chris’ wife just happened to selflessly volunteer to stand in, suddenly producing a perfectly fitting Natalie Portman wig she had stuffed in her purse. If Chris were a man, like, oh, I don’t know, Thor, he might’ve told his wife to back the fuck up while he felt up the hot Jewish chick he’d been promised in the script. But he didn’t, and Asgard fell like a limp dick.

Kristen Stewart really is an idiot

By brendon May 15, 2012 @ 1:21 PM

785

Kristen Stewart, Charlize Theron, and Chris Hemsworth all walked the red carpet in London last night for the premiere of ‘Snow White and the Huntsman’, and in the middle of all that, for reasons that only made sense in her pot addled mind, Stewart knelt down and flipped off Theron and Thor.

How this monotone 6 continues to get a free pass while Megan Fox gets attacked is one of the most baffling things I’ve ever seen. She always looks like she doesn’t think she’s in this scene, even while the other characters are all staring at her.

(image source = wenn, splash, getty)

Thor and Elsa Pataky went to the pool

By brendon April 08, 2011 @ 3:15 PM

Elsa Pataky

Thor star Chris Hemsworth and his wife Elsa Pataky, who was in Snakes on a Plane and will be in Fast Five this summer, hung out by the pool in Miami earlier today, and I really would have assumed she would look better than this. When she goes out she normally looks hot. Now I don’t feel so bad for calling her a cunt behind her back.

(image source = inf daily)

its the Thor comic-con trailer

By brendon July 29, 2010 @ 3:08 PM

(NOTE – trailer is still up, just give it a few seconds to load)

The 5-minute ‘Thor’ trailer shown exclusively at Comic-Con over the weekend is now slightly less exclusive, because it got leaked online today. Chris Hemsworth as Thor, Natalie Portman as Girl and Anthony Hopkins as One Eyed Anthony Hopkins are all prominently featured, but it still gets a little dull because it’s so much longer than a normal trailer. At least until Destroyer shows up at the very end. Seeing him throw those cars around, it was just like when I played with his action figure when I was 16 I mean 10.