06.16.2010 chris klein got a DUI (holy shit update)

Radar is reporting that Chris Klein was arrested early this morning, around 3:30am, on suspicion of drunk driving after being stopped on the Hollywood Freeway in Los Angeles.

And that’s all that’s known at this point. Because it’s Chris Klein. I doubt the internets top investigators were assigned to this one. He might be the worst actor alive, and seems like a complete douche. Which is why I really hope he goes to jail. He would think he was real cool and would try to hang out with the black guys, and walk up to them in the day yard while one guy bench presses 8000 pounds and say, “whats up man, I’m Chris Klein, the actor. Yeah, from American Pie. Whats up. I’m in here for some bullshit, you know what I mean. Fuckin pig cops. Yeah, look, look this guy over here, he knows what I’m sayin.” Later, as they rushed him to the emergency room and tried to figure out which part of his head was the front, his ass would look like a life preserver.

AMAZING UPDATE - now its being reported that Klein had a blood alcohol level of .20, close to THREE TIMES the legal limit. And that dick had a dog in the car.

10.31.2006 HOLLYWOOD IS FILLED WITH LAME IDIOTS

Somehow Bill Maher (who, luckily for him, is the only one who watches South Park.  Oh, wait, no, he's not) isn't the biggest tool in these pictures.  Chris Klein is just embarrassing.  Is he even in a costume or does he work at Shakeys now, handing out flyers.  He could have dressed as a ladybug or a giant penis and looked cooler than this.     

So what’s my costume for tonight?  You might say I'm already in it, disguised as sexy internet celebrity, when in realty I'm a sexy secret agent who circles the globe fighting sexy terrorist threats to the United States. To keep America safe. And sexy!