By Lex July 17, 2014 @ 12:01 PM
I take back all that shit I said about the ESPYs being more sucky than Lindsay Lohan at a cocaine prize package glory hole. Fuck, that was a reach. Chrissy Teigen’s boobs make everything interesting. I think she knows that too. Her drunken rants on Twitter are mildly amusing, but her tits without a bra are the world’s best house party. Even Colin Kaepernick etching the Vagina Monologues logo into his head couldn’t shake my gaze. I wish the still alive one from Kriss Kross were here to sing me out.
Photo Credit: Getty
By Lex May 21, 2014 @ 6:28 PM
I suppose if I was a supermodel, I’d be showing my boobs off everywhere I went. I’ll take a half pound of salami, couple of those ribeyes, and, hey, check out my perfect titties! Don’t you wish you were John Legend, or all those guys before John Legend that John Legend has to put out of his mind when doinking his wife? Fuck, that’s a good life. These particular photos of Chrissy are shot in black and white so it’s cool if your wife catches you masturbating. Tell her to stop judging your art.
Photo credit: Sasha Samsonnova
By Travis May 06, 2014 @ 2:00 PM
Not everyone who went to the Met Gala last night was a talentless, overrated amateur porn star or an actress who hasn’t starred in anything good in at least a decade. At least Chrissy Teigen was there with her husband, Whoever, and she was wearing what we are lazily calling the best dress of the evening, because her side boob was hanging out and she knew just how to stand for all of the cameras. We may never know what happens when the doors closed for this overpriced shit show of excess and celebration of assholes, but it’s safe to say that Chrissy did it best. In fact, she should win the right to wear that dress that Madonna wanted to shove her old breasts into at next year’s Met Gala.
Photo Credits: Getty and Instagram
By Lex March 13, 2014 @ 10:21 AM
Photo Credit: Chrissy Teigen / Instagram, Beach Bunny
By Travis February 24, 2014 @ 11:00 AM
Continuing their ongoing month of celebration for the fact that they’ve remained relevant in the face of several decades of internet pornography, the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue models competed in a volleyball tournament against some other celebrities over the weekend at the Food Network South Beach Food and Wine Festival. Most notably, Jamie Foxx was there to remind everyone that he once won an Oscar, and probably to hit on Chrissy Teigen, Hannah Ferguson, Samantha Hoopes, Kate Bock, Lily Aldridge and the many other models, because he’s simply a man with a penis and needs. But then Richard Sherman showed up, and everyone probably held their purses a little tighter and quietly tried to dial 911 on their phones through their pockets, all while he rescued a kitten from a tree and helped build a house for a homeless family while teaching them all how to read.
Photo Credits: JLN Photography/WENN.com
By Lex February 21, 2014 @ 3:47 PM
Photo Credit: INFphoto.com