Chrissy Teigen Topless Because Now It Matters

By Lex March 12, 2015 @ 3:05 PM

Chrissy Teigen And John Legend Do Topless Shoot Together In Miami
I can already feel Chris Pine crying over my left shoulder. This is some pretty moving shit. John Legend and his troublemaking model wife with the spectacular yabbos got shot without their respective tops on along Miami Beach. Whoever they hired to wrangle away the crowds in no way stopped at least one paparazzi from shooting the topless shit out of Teigen’s bare breasts moist from the ocean blue. Sometimes paparazzi take creepy pictures of toddlers in the park or cause pre-op trannies to plow into innocents on the PCH. But you can’t throw the baby out with the bathwater when the baby is a sweet pair of Eurasian titties we’ve been waiting years to see fully.

Photo Credit: INF

Chris Brown Blocks Chrissy Teigen On Twitter

By Lex March 06, 2015 @ 1:07 PM

Chrissy Teigen Leggy At Pedicure Event In NYC
That uneasy feeling you get when you realize Chris Brown has shut you out of his life. There’s really no preparing for it. It hits you like a dirty hand of hot Chinese mustard to the lachrymal gland. You’ll pretend you’re just vulnerable from your period, but really you’re hurting much deeper. The place where Chris Brown used to touch you. No, deeper. Yep, there. Now understand that it will never feel this way again and let flow the sorrowful torrents. Thankfully Chrissy Teigen drinks. It’s like crying in reverse.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet/INF

John Legend Is A Lucky Asshole And Shit Around The Web

By Jack January 26, 2015 @ 12:00 PM


John Legend showed what a lucky son of a bitch he is by making out with his super hot girlfriend Chrissy Teigen in the pages of GQ. There’s also the questionable popularity of his music, but that must come second.

Check out their steamy couple portraits. (Huffington Post)

Miss Beverly Hills, Chanelle Riggan, has a major nip slip during the Miss California USA pageant. (TMZ)

Heidi Klum shows off her new lingerie line and she’s still very fuckable. (Egotastic)

Gigi Hadid shows off her boobage for Guess. (Drunken Stepfather)

Bryana Holly knows how to wear a fucking bikini. (Popoholic)

Hethielly Beck uses her titties to sell 138 Water. (The Superficial)

Hermione makes my childhood wank dreams come true by playing a Belle from Beauty and the Beast. (Moviepilot)

David Blaine Tricks Models

By Matt January 19, 2015 @ 6:33 AM


If you’ve never watched one of David Blaine’s TV specials I’ll spare you the trouble: he’s a masochist who likes attention and also knows cool card tricks. When displaying his sleight of hand street magic he targets the lowest common denominator. Scratch that he goes for the people who barely qualify as a numerator. Blaine pulls tricks on the brown paper bag crowd and provincial tourists who’ve never seen a video camera and snap photos of the street signs. The next logical step would be models. He wowed model Chrissy Teigen while her singing husband wondered how he got past security. Pick a card. Now name the Vice President. Fuck it, name any living person. Are you listening? These are called cards. Yes it’s base ten. Are we rolling? I can’t wait until this guy’s eyes are charged with rape.

Photo Credit: Instagram 

Chrissy Teigen Runs Braless

By Lex December 02, 2014 @ 9:54 AM

Chrissy Teigen Running Braless On Photoshoot With John Legend In NYC
Nobody is wearing bras anymore in New York. It started with the Willis girls, but nobody really notices what the Willis girls are doing, so somebody else probably gets the credit. Rihanna maybe. She seems to hate underwear and sobriety. Chrissy Teigen hasn’t worn a bra since middle school and now she’s famous and married to John Legend. Baring your tits will always be simpler than AP Chem. Whose the smart one now?

Photo Credit: FameFlynet

Chrissy Teigen Posts Nipple To Instagram

By Lex October 03, 2014 @ 7:13 AM

Chrissy Teigan Posts Nipple To Instagram

Photo Credit: Instagram, Splash