By brendon September 11, 2008 @ 9:24 AM

The Jonas Brothers have a lot to learn about being famous celebrities.  In fact everyone at the VMAs this year were pretty low key with the dressing room riders.  

(Christina Aguilera’s) demands reportedly included four black bath towels and a dressing room decked out with vanilla-scented candles, not to mention a space heater and two bottles of Verve Clique champagne to give her a little kick before the show.
The Jonas Brothers are said to have insisted on apple juice at room temperature for their backstage needs and added eight Red Bull Sugar free beverages, plus 6 regular Red Bulls and 24 pieces of California sushi rolls as part of their dressing room package.

These guys are fags.  I would have been like Alfred Molina in Boogie Nights.  High as fuck in just a bathrobe, a shirtless Japanese boy throwing fire crackers, peacocks, guns, sirens, some hot Asian girl with big tits dressed as a snow bunny.  Just total madness.  I like to think if I were famous I would request all that stuff.  I request that stuff now it's just no one gives it to me.  Fuckers.


By brendon August 07, 2008 @ 7:40 AM

The Internet is a magical place, where all your dreams can and do come true.  Especially if you’re dream is to see Christian Aguilera with tits photoshopped onto her.  For some reason this very old picture is everywhere today.  It's from March Fake of 200Fake.  Hey look, and this is Jessica Alba, TOTALLY NAKED!  Get it.  Do you see what I did there?


By brendon May 16, 2008 @ 5:48 AM

Short, skinny, blond hair, big tits, great voice, married to a normal guy, and almost never makes it on to stupid pages like this for anything bad.  The only way Christina Aguilera could be any more awesome is if she were the leader of a government team of black op assassins.

(picture source = splash news online)


By brendon May 01, 2008 @ 8:53 AM

Christina Aguilera left the kid at home and got trashed last night at Crown Bar in West Hollywood. She could barely walk as she left and had to get help from her husband Jordan Bratman, in a scene that looked very much like these pictures from 2006.  Also similar to 2006: my skull and crossbones scarf and black nail polish.  Why do the trends keep changing!


By brendon February 26, 2008 @ 10:24 AM

I actually saw a girls boobs once, and it's with a great deal of relief that I report that they didn't look like … umm … this.  I have to image I would be gay if they did.  The only way these could look worse is if they had little faces and hands.


By brendon February 21, 2008 @ 10:02 AM

This clip should be a delightful romp where we stare at Christina Aguilera’s enormous rack and all is right with the world, but Ellen Degeneres is in it too and she just makes the whole thing creepy.  She's so ugly I get a little scared.  Looking at her I feel the same way as I do when I see conjoined twins.  I get this weird feeling in my stomach.  So to see her leering over Christina’s huge boobs is really uncomfortable.  I don’t like to think about ugly people having sex and I sure as fuck don’t like to watch them getting turned on.  By now, Ellens vibrator must have grooves worn in to it like the handlebars to a 10 year olds bike.  Good luck getting that image out of your head.