Denise Richards has written a book that came out on Tuesday, because as the description says…
“(We’ve) seen her many public faces—the beautiful vixen, the devoted mother, the hard-working entertainer, and the fun-loving friend. But how well do we really know Denise Richards?”
It’s an intriguing question, and one I’m very interested in getting to the bottom of, especially now that this weeks Us magazine cover story says there are even more layers to Denise, such as “dimwitted medical patient”.
Denise Richards hasn’t always been happy with her body (and now she) opens up about her series of botched boob jobs.
“When I was 19, a doctor put in bigger implants than what I asked for. I was in such a hurry to get them that I didn’t research my doctor. I just thought because they’re a plastic surgeon, they must be good. You have to be your advocate for your own body and ask 100 questions.”
Ask my doctors questions? Maybe if I was a hypochondriac. I prefer to just wing it before surgery. In fact sometimes I play a little game where I lie to them about my symptoms and see if they can figure it out. It makes taking the medication they prescribe more exciting.
While her ex husband Charlie Sheen was on stage this weekend reminding everyone that a little of that jackass goes a long way, Denise Richards was on the beach in the Bahamas reminding everyone how hot she can still look. I wish more ex wives and girlfriends would get revenge like this, by taking sexy bikini pictures, instead of telling their friends stories about erectile dysfunction and laughing, like mine do.
(image source = splash news online)
The last time there were bikini pictures of Denise Richards, she once again kept her stupid denim shorts on, and so I summoned up my courage and said I’d had it with her non-ass showing shenanigans. Then I posted pictures of different girls who weren’t so stuck up. It’s part of my tough love program. And now, well what do we have here? Denise with her pants off and all wet, looking hot again. Mariah Carey was right, I am a hero, in fact we all are in our own special way.
(7 more pics here. 3 bonus pics because it would have been a shame to crop them here and here and here. hq jump here. source = splash news online)
Denise Richards hit up the beaches in Hawaii again today, and again she dragged her dumb kids around and never took off her shorts. So if she’s not gonna bother to care about these pictures I’m not sure why the hell I would. Especially when last night was the 2009 Face of Origin pageant in England or maybe Australia. Oh I know. Can you believe it’s been a year already? Time sure does fly when you don’t know what the hell is going on. The big favorite of course was Rachel Burr, but could she live up to the hype and take the crown? The answer is a definitive, “yes presumably. If that is indeed her kissing the trophy. The caption wasn’t all that clear.”
(12 more pics here. hq jump here. source = getty and pacific coast)
JON AND KATE PLUS 8 - the new season began just 4 weeks ago, and TLC planned on 40 new episodes this year, but the show is now going on hiatus until August. This should give Jon and Kate time to repair their relationship, as long as Jon is willing to talk, and “Kate” is recast by someone who isn’t a condescending bitch. (source = star)
TRANSFORMERS - is racist. “These new robots … have a simian appearance, with wide faces and huge ears. One of them has a gold bucktooth. They (talk) in some sort of modern day rap-age jive, calling each other ‘bitch-ass’ or ‘punk,’ talking with an exaggerated, crunked-up ’street’ accent. They appear to be stoned all the time. And they can’t read. (They) are completely illiterate … Simply put they are offensive beyond measure.” Why stop there? Why not have them date two overweight white robots, and maybe a scene where Optimus can’t find them for the battle at noon because they’re still asleep. (source = chud)
DENISE RICHARDS - is in Hawaii with the kids she had with Charlie Sheen. Those kids are doomed. We should bleed them, give them a complete transfusion, see if that get’s all the crappy genetics out of them. Get blood from someone good. Maybe make it from Paul Newman DNA. I don’t know if that would work but I think we should try.
(7 more pics here. hq jump here. source = splash news online)
DENISE RICHARDS IS DOING GREAT – the first pictures of Denise Richards starring in a Bollywood movie are making the rounds today, and I've never seen an entire Indian movie, but I like to assume they’re all still like this. Because I’m incredibly racist.
MATTHEW MCCAUGHEY IS DOING EVEN BETTER – "Surfer, Dude" was the movie Matthew was filming when he was running around shirtless every day a few months ago. And tomorrow it gets released on DVD. It's skipping theaters (mostly) and going right to DVD. One reason for the movies failure might be because MM was cast as a baked surfer, and therefore almost certainly had no idea whatsoever that he was in a movie or why these cameras were following him.
ED WESTWICK IS CLEARLY GAY – "Gossip Girl" star Ed Westwick had a chance to meet David Beckham but he was too flustered and overcome with emotion to say hello. The only way that could sound any gayer is if when he saw Becks, he put the back of his hand on his forehead then fell backwards, then made a little fan out of a flyer as he tried to catch his breath.
JENNIFAA YOPEZ IS NOT GETTING A DIVORCE – JelLo is now denying reports that she is set to get a divorce. In related news, no one gives a shit either way.
