You might want to put some pillows behind you in case you faint, but Lindsay Lohan is a self-centered brat and Dina Lohan is an enabler who lies every time she talks. Like yesterday, for example, when she explained Lindsays 100 million dollar lawsuit. The New York Post says…

(After Lindsay saw the ad), “She said, ‘Mommy, help me. This is wrong. How can they do this?’ ” Dina Lohan said of a tearful phone call with her 23-year-old daughter.
“They’re little babies doing this, mocking another child who’s just trying to survive Hollywood, basically,” Dina Lohan said.

I don’t know why Dina thinks she needs a lawyer. All she has to do is tell the jury that. Don’t change a word. There are little babies mocking another child. Who in this case is 23. And has been to jail 4 times.

Lohan filed a lawsuit (for) $100 million in damages for her pain and suffering.
“I’m just basically glad I took a stand. I’m not going to let them do this to us anymore,” Dina Lohan said of the “horrible” and “mean” ad.

It doesn’t really seem like Dina has thought this all the way through.
1. A baby on TV is named Lindsay. The baby steals another girls boyfriend and is a milk-aholic.
2. Lindsay Lohan, though not a baby, thinks the ad is about her because she’s a slut and an alcoholic.
3. E Trade has sullied her good name.

Ahhhh, okay, noow I get it. (note – I don’t get it)

Radar has another Lindsay Lohan audio clip up today, this time from Dina Lohan (her mom) to Michael Lohan (her dad). This one is from September of last year, and here Dina says she tried to get Lindsay to go to rehab but Lindsay didn’t want to. Quick to give up at things, that was pretty much the end of that.

“You don’t even know what I’d go through trying to get her into, like, rehab and stuff. She’d like, punch me in the face, kick me out of the car…like you don’t know the shit I went through trying to get her an intervention by myself. It was very difficult. She’s really sad and really hurt and really…despondent. I told her not to go to L.A. at 18…she did. I couldn’t leave these other three to go get her and it was, like, a mess.”

It seems hard to believe that anyone who describes it as “like, rehab and stuff” really had any concrete plans for anything.  Especially when the person saying it is a 46-year-old woman. It sounds like they’re making it up. Even more so at the “she punched me in the face and threw me out of the car” point. It sounds like she was just flipping channels and came to a Steven Segal movie.  “Yeah she punched me, and so, then, I tired to explain, like, rehab (click) by drawing a painting on a cave wall (click) at the first Olympics.  But she was all like, ‘fuck you man. I want your badge and your gun right now.’ If I went snoopin around the Senator again she was gonna have me arrested.”