The E! channel has graciously offered to pick up the multimillion dollar tab for Kim Kardashian and Kanye West’s wedding. It’s sort of a tradition really when the bride’s on her third husband, her dad is dead, and a dozen TV executives are paying for their kids braces off the antics of the small-headed ass-model in question. The whole things is going to be shot for a very special episode of the Kardashian family reality show, Cunts on Parade. This way the network can control all the logistics of the event and they don’t have to worry that Kanye will do something stupid like ride in on musthing elephant that mauls half the congregation. Instead, he can ride up in a Mini-Cooper chalked up with a Kotex presenting sponsorship advertisement. The wedding will be held somewhere outside of Paris but not in Versailles like Satan’s favorite couple had desired, But expect it to be a place that sounds magical, but only to be truly made so with the enchantment of the couple’s first ass-to-mouth encounter without a prophylactic dental dam. I always cry at weddings.
The Syrian Electronic Army became a household name two weeks ago, when so-called hackers logged into the Associated Press’ Twitter account and Tweeted that there had been an explosion at the White House and President Obama had been injured. The result was a 100-point dip in the DOW Jones Industrial Average in a matter of seconds, as people everywhere freaked out and prayed that Gerard Butler was coming to the rescue.
So how do you follow up a debut like that? By hacking E! Online’s Twitter feed apparently. That’s what the SEA did on Saturday, when they Tweeted that singer Justin Bieber had outted himself as “a gay” while also Tweeting that Angelina Jolie admitted that Jordan was responsible for the atrocities committed against Syrian refugees.
But since Bieber’s fans don’t know what any of those words mean, the hackers had to resort to calling someone gay. Although, a more impressive feat would have been hacking a Bieber fan’s Twitter account and spelling words correctly.
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