Elle Fanning Seems Ready to Be More Famous

By Lex July 03, 2015 @ 11:52 AM

Elle Fanning Bare Midriff Underwear Peek
Elle Fanning is the anti Kylie Jenner. Same age, but definable talent, un-injected body, and she doesn’t process your Visa card for peeks at her underwear. It’s some quirk of quantum physics that both girls can exist in nearly the same space at the same time. I blame Elle’s mom. She forgot that coming of age speech about putting family over self and upselling suitors by convincing them you’ve never had it in the ass before and you’re scared it’s going to hurt. Calvin Klein might cringe every time he sees girls wearing his underpants. I see it as sign of salvation. You don’t have to be a whore to get ahead. Though it remains a huge help.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet

Elle Fanning Doing Sex Scenes

By Lex October 10, 2014 @ 10:55 AM

Elle Fanning Wears A Bra To A Screening of The Young Ones
Elle Fanning seems kind of young for sex scenes, but when Gwyneth Paltrow’s little brother is directing his own story about the near future when earth has no water left thanks to the Republicans, you get jiggy with it on command. The film is called Young Ones because Child Sex was already taken. It’s right there in the title for the pederasts searching Moviefone by movie title and theater type: sparsely populated. Brooke Shields mom had her taken off her top for French directors even younger than Elle Fanning. Outside of some failed marriages and a short bout with wanting to drive herself and her children into a cement wall, Brooke turned out okay. Overall, the plight of teens sexualized in the media and onscreen is grossly exaggerated. Almost half are living relatively successful sober non-incarcerated lives ten years later. If you’re growing up on a Navajo reservation, you’d take those odds.

Photo Credit: INF,FameFlynet

Elle Fanning Causes Pedo-Riots in Tokyo

By Lex June 23, 2014 @ 5:30 PM

Elle Fanning Wears A 'Sleeping Beauty' Dress Arriving In Tokyo
I’ll chalk it up to youthful inexperience. But somebody should’ve seen the potential fallout from air dropping a blond teenager dressed in Disney pajamas into the heart of Japan. You could hear the thunk of a lone Pachinko ball as even businessmen dropping ten yen coins into panties dispensing vending machines turned to rush Elle Fanning. Imagine a million Japanese dudes hurtling toward you with their belts in their hands screaming in a foreign language about how naughty you’ve been. Get to the god damned chopper, Elle Fanning. There are no more Fannings after you.

Photo Credit: AKM-GSI

Tom Cruise is almost as big as a little girl

By brendon June 09, 2011 @ 10:46 AM


The highly anticipated ‘Super 8′ had it’s big fancy Hollywood premiere last night, and exciting celebrities like Tom Cruise were there. Here he is with the movies star, 13-year-old girl Elle Fanning (she’s Dakota Fannings daughter. Or sister. I should look that up). And obviously someones been drinking their milk because Tom is almost as big as that young girl now.

“Yeah, but she’s probably wearing heels,” you might be thinking. Oh please. As if Tom wasn’t. Yet they’re essentially the same size, even though “frail” doesn’t even beging to describe her appearance. Between her white blond hair and pale skin and that creepy dress, she looks like a ghost you’d see in a Swedish castle.

Oh, and look, Ryan Lee (imdb) was there too. He’s in this movie, and, SPOILER ALERT, he saves the day when the towns damn bursts. Try and guess how!

(image source = getty and bauer griffin)