By brendon September 23, 2008 @ 7:56 AM

On one hand, these pictures of Halle Berry being charmingly normal and taking her little girl to the park like any other parent is kind of gay, because it’s babies and doting parents and it's all touching and shit.  On the other hand, the sixth and seventh pictures show Halle on her knees looking up with her mouth open, so it doesn’t take much to imagine the most perverted awesome scene possible.  Join me won't you?

Update – CALLING ALL PERVERTS – okay someone Photoshop that shit because it turns out my imagination sucks.  Stupid internet.


By brendon July 04, 2008 @ 7:48 AM

Someone send Hawaii some cameras from this century immediately, because Halle Berry is there today doing a photo shoot for her new perfume, and she looks fantastic despite the fact that she had a baby just two months ago.  At least I think she looks fantastic.  It’s hard to tell with these crappy spy pictures.  If they have a horrible camera, someone at least should have pushed their way to the front.  That’s what I would have done.  I'm the strongest man in the world!


By brendon June 10, 2008 @ 10:00 AM

Halle Berry and her giant rack went to the dentist in Burbank over the weekend, and they did it while wearing this revealing top.  Which means this dentist guy spent the weekend imagining leaning over an unconscious Halle Berry and thinking of things to put into her mouth.  Man what a coincidence.

(picture source = inf daily)


By brendon April 30, 2008 @ 11:24 AM

Here are some pictures from yesterday of Halle Berry, and as you can tell, something about her has changed since she had a baby.  That’s right.  New glasses.  Here’s a close up of the glasses.  I think they might be Panama Jacks.  As I understand it, most of todays top stars wear Panama Jacks.


By brendon March 18, 2008 @ 4:16 PM

Although no official name has been chose for Halle Berrys new baby, Page Six reports a rumor that the little girl will be named Clara Stella Berry-Aubry. The Post says:

"Both mom and baby are doing well," revealed an insider at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles.
The Oscar winner, 41, and her male-model boyfriend, Gabriel Aubry, 32, have a private birthing suite on the hospital's third floor. Their new bundle of joy isn't on public display within the maternity ward's viewing area.
The twice-divorced actress evaded the paparazzi when Gabriel drove her to Cedars from their nearby Hollywood Hills home during the early hours of Sunday morning.
Halle gave birth just after 10 a.m. with her French-Canadian boyfriend by her side.

Clara Stella is a stupid name but this chick is gonna be so hot it's not even gonna matter. Her name could be Dick Chopper Offer and she’d still have 1900 dates to the prom.

UPDATE – so, according to People magazine, the babys name is actually Nahla Ariela Aubry.  Worlds dumbest name?  Well … no.  But still pretty damn dumb.


By brendon March 17, 2008 @ 8:53 AM

God it seems like this chick has been pregnant for years now, but last night Halle Berry finally gave birth, to a baby girl, at Cedars Sinai Hospital in Los Angeles.  She is 41, the father is 32-year-old male model Gabriel Aubry.  All are said to be doing well.  People magazine says:

Berry and the Aubry met while shooting a Versace ad in Los Angeles in November 2005 and first stepped out publicly together three months later at the February 2006 opening of a Versace boutique in New York City.
Berry first announced her pregnancy in September last year, when she was three months along.

This is troubling news for perverts everywhere, who were convinced Shiloh Jolie Pitt would be the sexiest baby ever.  Will this little girl and her fabulous genetics be even hotter?  Do Halle and Gabriel think they can just come into my life and turn my world upside down?  Can humans even rest their eyes upon such beauty, or is it reserved for the council of heaven?  These answers and more on the next … TYLER DURDEN!