afternoon headlines

LINDSAY LOHAN - 'Life and Style' points out the remarkable similarities between the women who "robbed" Lindsay and regular Lindsay. It would have been easy enough for her to truly disguise herself, but consider this: Lindsay is an idiot. (life and style) LADY GAGA - went on The Matt And Jo Radio Show in Australia and because Aussies are cool/drunk, they asked her straight out if she was a hermaphrodite. She didn't say...read more

morning headlines

VICTORIA BECKHAM - went to Barneys in Beverly Hills to buy a cheerleader outfit to wear for her husband. This is the only bad thing about Posh. She's married to David Beckham. How the hell do you follow that dude? She might as well be married to Batman. (the sun) BAD BOYS 3 - 14 years after the original and 6 after the sequel, Columbia Pictures has hired a writer for 'Bad Boys 3'. Michael Bay, Jerry Bruckheimer, Will...read more

morning headlines

MACUALAY CULKIN - is reportedly the biological father of Blanket, Michael Jacksons 7-year-old son. Culkin allegedly donated sperm to Michael when he was 21. Yeah I bet he did. It sounds like the cops showed up one day and Michael had to explain why there was a bowl of a young boys semen in his fridge. (source = the sun) VICTORIA BECKHAM - went to the gym this weekend with no makeup. Still looked hot though. Natural...read more

Afternoon Headlines

JOHN GOSSELIN - filmed scenes today for "John and Kate Plus 8" where the adorable kids sell lemonade to raise money for a fire station and he wears a shirt that says "Lies Lies Lies...". "Because screw those kids," John probably thought to himself. " It's not '8 Plus John'. Me me me!" CHRIS BROWN - will be sentenced today, at 2pm pct, after pleading guilty to assaulting Rihanna. He's expected to get 180 days of...read more

Morning Headlines

WEEKEND BOX OFFICE - "Inglourious Basterds" crushed this weekend, pulling in 65.1M worldwide. This is good news for director Quentin Tarantino and star Brad Pitt, two big names who don't always deliver box office. A friend of mine almost didn't go see it but I told her she should. And then I kidnapped her sister to let her know I meant business. (variety) CURRENT SONG - the remix of "Superstar" from Lupe Fiasco,...read more

Afternoon headlines

MICHAEL JACKSON - The AP confirms today he will be buried on August 29, but that "details about the ceremony have been tightly guarded." They go on to confirm that Jackson will be buried in a private ceremony at Forest Lawn-Glendale on the Holly Terrace at the cemetery's Great Mausoleum, about 8 miles north of downtown Los Angeles. What, no longitude and latitude? Wow, these details are closely guarded. (source = ap)...read more

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Morning Headlines

JOE ROGAN - pee's in a cup and then drinks it in this video. And he gets some radio DJ to do the same. So in a way it's like 2 Girls 1 Cup, except it's guys and their penises. In other words, it's way worse. (source - redban) MICHAEL JACKSON - may or may not have been buried. It's not clear anymore. Last week two reports said he was. Now, who knows. Are we even positive that he's dead? Because sometimes you can give...read more

Afternoon headlines

KIRSTIE ALLEY - has four years to live because of her binge eating and total lack of self control. She's now 58 and over 250 pounds. The article is from the Enquirer, but put the quotes in a different order and you could rewrite it for Popular Science, bragging that even motionless tubs of shit can live to 62 in this modern age of wonders. (source = NE) BRAD PITT - Will not be running for mayor of New Orleans, despite...read more

Morning Headlines

I HATE YOU - Even though everyone knew it was going to suck, "G.I. Joe" made over $100M this weekend. If there was any doubt before, this is undeniable proof that people in this world are mostly stupid. (source = variety) DANE COOK - got boo'd at the Teen Choice Awards after he said to Vanessa Hudgens, "Girl you got to keep your clothes on!" It wasn't clear if the crowd was supporting Vanessa, or if even little kids...read more

Afternoon Headlines

VICTORIA BECKHAM - was in Denver today to fill in for Paula Abdul on the first day of American Idol auditions. New rumors claim Paula may still return if they pay her 10M. To recap: Paula quit late Tuesday night, and by Friday morning the producers had replaced her with someone far smarter, hotter, younger and free. Ahh, well played Paula. I think someone has been reading "The Prince". (source = the ap) WILL SMITH AND...read more

Afternoon Headlines

KATY PERRY - has agreed to be one of the guest judges replacing Paula Abdul during the American Idol auditions, which begin tomorrow in Denver. It's not clear who the fourth judge will be for that. One artist who is being mentioned is busty bikini model Denise Milani, although mostly by me, just now. (source = ny daily news) STEVEN TYLER - the Aerosmith lead singer suffered head, neck and shoulder injuries after...read more

Afternoon Headlines

RIHANNA - will request a less restrictive restraining order against Chris Brown tomorrow when he is formally sentenced for assaulting her. The current order demands he stay at least 50 yards away at all times. The new order would drop that, and state that he merely not "annoy, molest, or harass" her. If I were them I would add "punch in the face" just so everyone is on the same page. (source = radar) GI JOE - Last...read more

Afternoon Headlines

JESSICA BIEL - made her stage debut this weekend in the musical "Guys and Dolls". That's her above singing "If I Were A Bell". But her run was just for three nights. I hope she does more performances next week. Because while she was doing that, I could break into her house. (source = ok) DREW BARRYMORE - has over 200 dolphin figurines, and is convinced she was a dolphin in a previous life. Another possibility is that...read more

Afternoon Headlines

MICHAEL JACKSON - Joe Jackson confirmed today that Omer Bhatti is Michael Jacksons biological son. "Yes, I knew he had another son, yes I did. He looks like a Jackson, acts like a Jackson, can dance like a Jackson. This boy is a fantastic dancer." Oh no. What does Joe have in mind? Omer will chop off his foot if he knows what's good for him. (source = radar) LINDSAY LOHAN - Either Lindsay Lohan went blond again, and...read more

Morning headlines

RIHANNA - may be back with Chis Brown. They checked into separate rooms at the Trump International Hotel on Friday, though neither have any scheduled appearances or business in New York. She must be crazy, but everyone is different I guess. When I see someone who beat me up for example, I usually wet my pants and run the other away. (source = ny post) LINDSAY LOHAN - walked around a store in LA barefoot this weekend,...read more