Heidi Klum is in a bikini

By brendon August 02, 2011 @ 3:18 PM

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Heidi Klum spent this morning with her husband Seal and their 4 kids on a yacht off the coast of Ibiza, Spain, because yes, the whole god damn world has a yacht except for me and you apparently.

(image source = bauer griffin)

Heidi Klum must be a popular mom

By brendon July 15, 2011 @ 3:01 PM

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Heidi Klum took a walk in Manhattan this morning with her son Henry, 5, and her daughter Leni, 7, who were on their way to summer camp. Todays first activity: ducking under the other dads erections.

(image source = pacific coast and inf and flynet)

Heidi Klum looks like a good mom

By brendon June 21, 2011 @ 4:25 PM

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Heidi Klum spent the morning playing with her four kids at a community center in Soho today, including Leni, her 7-year-old daughter with Formula 1 team owner Flavio Briatore, and Henry Samuel, her giant 5-year-old son with Seal. After that she probably went and had some more kids with some other guys. The whore.

(image source = pacific coast and inf and flynet)

as always, Heidi Klum won Halloween (UPDATE)

By brendon November 01, 2010 @ 4:00 PM

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I clearly don’t have the proper hobbies to know what Heidi Klum and Seal were dressed as for their Halloween party last night, but, like she does every single year, Heidi won the costume contest, for sheer enthusiasm if nothing else. She’s so unapologetically goofy. It’s kind of adorable. And who else could prompt people to say, “I would totally fuck that 15 foot purple chick.”

(SEXY UPDATEpreview pic. Look how happy being a dork makes her.)

Jessica Simpson is the secret Project Runway judge

By brendon September 09, 2010 @ 2:03 PM

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The ultimate winner of Project Runway is decided every year by giving a few of the designers a runway show at Fashion Week in New York. It’s a big deal, a huge honor, so they always get a really fashionable celebrity as a guest judge. Or in this case, Jessica Simpson. People says…

With her new denim line in stores now, it’s only fitting that Jessica Simpson is getting her fashionable feet wet at the runway shows of New York City Fashion Week. And on Thursday, the starlet made a trip to the Project Runway finale, where she was announced as the surprise guest judge.

Jesus Christ, are people in that audience actually applauding? I thought fashion people were mean. Boo that fat bitch. Don’t encourage her. Style and beautiful clothes are your life, and she’s selling denim bras and panties. “BOOOO, BOOOOO YOU SUCK!”

the Emmys, as always, were a baffling mess

By brendon August 30, 2010 @ 1:10 PM

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The Hollywood Reporter says the ratings for last nights Emmy Awards were just slightly higher than last year (a 10.0 in 2009, a 10.1 for 2010) which proves that people will watch anything because that show never makes any god damn sense. First of all, everyone always looks like hell. January Jones looked like a fishing lure, and Anna Paquin dressed up like Judge Dredd.

Then on top of that, the winners usually suck, highlighted last night by Jim Parsons winning Best Actor in a Comedy. What they’re saying is that the funniest person on TV this year was a guy on ‘the Big Bang Theory’, and that he was better in a comedy than Larry David or Alec Baldwin, or Adam Scott in ‘Party Down’ or Joel McHale in ‘Community’.

How does someone that simple minded even figure out how to vote? How many ballots were sent before they stopped eating them? It would be like an award for a suspense movie, and ‘the Usual Suspects’ losing to a home movie of someone playing ‘Got Your Nose’ with a toddler. “Where did it go?’, Emmy voters would cry out in disbelief!

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