Hugh Hefner Manages To Annoy The Living In The After-Life

December 25, 2017 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

It’s no secret that most old people are annoying. The closer someone gets to assisted breathing and high-fiving death the bigger the burden they become as a person. 

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How To Get Into Hugh Hef’s Final Mansion Party

November 14, 2017 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

I wonder how many people were waiting for Hugh Hefner to die so they could put chicks with dicks as centerfolds and throw a celebratory bash at his mansion without the obligation of inviting the man himself. 

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Crystal Hefner Wasn’t In Hef’s Will, But Still Cashing In

October 3, 2017 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Hugh Hefner was more than just a man, he became a lifestyle. He was a pioneer in psuedo porn back when seeing a perky pair wasn’t so readily available as it is today with the internet. 

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Hugh Hefner Dead, So Goes Fun

September 28, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Hugh Hefner finally died. It’s been one of those decade long slow walks to the grave that most people probably hope they get to experience.

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Cooper Hefner Retroactively Embarrassed Over Trump Cover

August 28, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

It’s not unusual for the sons of inheritance to believe they earnestly earned their professional stature. The alternative theory is too demeaning to consider. Though more ambitious men will intentionally not follow in their successful father’s footsteps to avoid any possible confusion.

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Playboy Bringing Back the Tits

February 15, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Here’s how the free market works better than millions of baristas and NBC executives hysterically sharing fake news stories on social media. Playboy pulled tits from their magazine, people who were still buying the magazine stopped buying it, they brought the tits back. Hillary Clinton – still unemployed.

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Hugh Hefner Still Alive And Awful

October 3, 2016 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

If Hugh Hefner was in his prime right now he’d most likely be in jail for rape. Assuming he escaped the charges, he’d probably he a highly successful pariah. There’s not much middle ground. Society arbitrarily selects a few privileged white dudes and R Kellys for the sake of diversity and lets them run amok.

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You Can Now Buy The Playboy Mansion And Shit Around The Web

January 12, 2016 | crap around the web | Brendon| 0 Comments

The Playboy Mansion is for sale for only 200 million dollars. The catch is that Hugh Hefner gets to still live there until he dies. If I wanted a crusty old pervert hanging around my house I’d have my uncle Raul move in. He’s a pain in the ass, but straight. Not enough chlorine could […]

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Hugh Hefner’s Son Disses Holly Madison

June 29, 2015 | Uncategorized | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Hugh Hefner’s ex fake girlfriend and reality show whore Holly Madison wrote a superbly uninteresting tell all book about life in the Playboy Mansion and is now spilling the mundane beans to any shitty tabloid who will listen. Some of her major revelations are that Hefner once offered her drugs and that he is sometimes […]

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Hugh And Crystal Hefner Are Pretty Fucking Creepy

October 30, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Somebody pulled the old man from his sarcophagus and dressed him up like Robin Thicke so that his young bride would finally look like she had a purpose for being bent over in a tight dress. The two of them together looked like a wax exhibit at the Boner Kill Museum. More out of a […]

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