By Lex March 10, 2014 @ 6:50 PM
Irina Shayk just filmed her debut role in the new Hercules movie. No, not that last one where Kellan Lutz said some stupid shit that made no sense and asked everybody to look at his nipples while he bathed in Perrier. This next horrible one where we once more pretend that Dwayne Johnson is an actor. Irina Shayk isn’t an actress, but she is pretty damn good looking so however horrible she is at playing Hercules wife won’t really matter. Maybe Brett Ratner will do with Hercules what he did to X-Men and we won’t have to see anymore of these films for several years. We really don’t need any more classical Greek inspired adventure movies. We have plenty of relatable modern day heroes like Congressmen and single moms and gay actors.
Photo Credit: Beach Bunny
By Lex March 05, 2014 @ 5:25 PM
I guess when you’re 28, you’re a couple standard deviations outside the target range for a classic R. Kelly wet rape. That or looking like Lady Gaga seems to give you a free pass for steamy sexualized videos with Kelly without fear of him whipping out the video camera and urging you not to tell your mom anything if you still want that gold bracelet. At some point, you might think women would stop agreeing to be party to these kinds of photos with a guy who likes underaged girls with the full passion of his being, but, fat paychecks do help those annoying moral equivocations solve themselves but quickly.
Photo Credit: V Magazine
By Lex February 05, 2014 @ 4:09 PM
The Winter Olympics in Sochi already suck. Independent of crappy Russian plumbing and the Muslim terrorists and the mass slaughter of canines, it’s the fucking Winter Olympics. It’s a series of sports made up by rich Swiss kids in the 1700′s because it was too fucking snowy to kick the sheep’s bladder around like their British friends. Until they add artillery pieces to the bobsled and make it blast yetis out of its path it’s just a pale imitation of the imitation Matterhorn. Even Obama’s grand plan to airdrop gays onto Sochi seems played out at this point. And I’m a man who loves a good gay airdrop. Can Irina Shayk’s tits save the Winter Olympics? Strap her naked on a luge and let’s find out. I’d watch Bob Costas wax poetic about that by the fireplace.
Photo Credit: Irina Shayk/Instagram
By Lex January 24, 2014 @ 5:00 PM
Now we’re talking. Hot Russian girls in their underwear. I want to buy some of that. I remember when Irina Shayk was still using her really complicated Russian name and trying to figure out why she wasn’t catching on. Even a medium level Moscow hotel hooker knows you need a solid stage name if you’re going to make Western men feel good happy fun times. Shayk is solid, simple, and easy to remember when signing over traveler’s cheques.
Photo Credit: La Clover
By Lex December 31, 2013 @ 12:36 PM
Photo Credit: Beach Bunny
By Lex November 21, 2013 @ 4:58 PM
I’m only now figuring out that if I turn my Still Life of BBWs Bent Over at the Beach photo series into black and white, those unwieldy thigh folds that look like extra vaginas suddenly becomes art, not just fetish fare. Black and white makes everything okay. If people were aroused by charcoal gray labia, we’d probably all be watching porn in black and white to avoid Smokey confiscating our VHS tapes at the Texas border.
Photo Credit: 7 Hollywood Magazine