Jane Lynch Files for Divorce; Cory Monteith Kills Himself

By Lex July 15, 2013 @ 2:37 AM


I can see not wanting to live in a world where lesbian couples can’t seem to do any better than straight couples. How can two people with vaginas, who know how to please vaginas, not get along? It seems perfect. It probably did to Cory Monteith who the press is refusing to say died of drugs. He just died, like 31-year olds often do in hotel rooms. Maybe from bad room service or possibly an assassination attempt I guess. I’ve been in a Canadian hotel. The first is definitely possible. Though I’d still bet on the drugs. The history of young actors overdosing in hotel rooms is legendary. It’s almost as long as the history of actors having secret gay hookups in hotel rooms. Though that latter list will no longer include Jane Lynch and her wife.

Thursday headlines, with Michelle Hunziker in a bikini

By brendon June 02, 2011 @ 7:34 PM

michelle_hunziker_bikini_varigotti_italy

ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER – had lunch with his son Patrick today, and things seem to go fine. Which sucks because wouldn’t it be badass if he went all apeshit with some kind of Oedipus complex. The Kennedys are all nuts so I figure there’s still time. (popeater)

KIM KARDASHIAN – is now engaged of course, but was the proposal filmed as footage for her reality show? Oh gosh, I wonder what the answer is. (people)

JANE LYNCH – will host the Emmys this year, a very prestigious honor only trusted to those who have proven they can read a teleprompter. (la times)

MICHELLE HUNZIKER – has been lounging around at the beach in Varigotti, Italy, for about a week now. Because she’s a model. What the hell did you think she was gonna do, go around solving crimes? (splash news)

Wednesday headlines

By brendon August 11, 2010 @ 12:48 AM

COUGAR TOWN – was created by Bill Lawrence (he also created ‘Scrubs’ and ‘Spin City’) and I was genuinely astonished to discover it’s a funny show. Christa Miller really knows how to deliver a line, as you can see in the clip above. Point being, Lawrence says Sarah Chalke, Zach Braff, John C. McGinley, Donald Faison or Judy Reyes (all of ‘Scrubs’) will be on ‘Town’ this year. I don’t really care about this, I just like that clip of Christa. No one actually reads this shit, do they? (e!)

JANE LYNCH – of ‘Glee’ will host SNL next season. I’ve never seen ‘Glee’ but she was great in ‘Arrested Development’ and ‘Party Down’ before some dickhead canceled those shows. She’s a real anomaly in Hollywood because she’s successful and talented. Jack Black better fucking pray that trend doesn’t catch on. (people)

RHYS DARBY – isn’t famous but he was the bands manager in ‘Flight of the Conchords’ and he’s a leading candidate to replace Steve Carell on ‘the Office’. So now I’m all pissy because in the last 20 seconds I’ve been reminded of 3 great comedies that got canceled while unwatchable shit like ‘Two and A Half Men’ goes on forever. If I was locked in a room with a TV in a cage showing ‘Two’, and there was a knife and a remote control and I was told I could only pick up one, I’d slit my own throat rather than roll the dice that the remote was some Saw-like trick. (ew)

TWITTER – Follow me. Or else. You see this dynamite? You see these hostages? Do you want them to die? (twitter)

SANDRA BULLOCK – was with Jesse James in Long Beach on Monday, the first time they’ve been seen together since their divorce in June. I don’t get this. He must be like that singing frog in the Bugs Bunny cartoon, entertaining as hell in private, because every time I see him I get so bored I forget I’m even watching TV. He starts talking, my eyes glaze over, then I snap out of it and wonder why it’s dark outside now. (story = radar, pictures of sandra at saturdays teen choice awards = wire image)