Jared Leto Lands Lead Role In Hugh Hefner Biopic

Contrary to popular assumptions, I hope this movie isn’t targeted to cater to men who receive thoughtless Father’s Day gift sets exclusively from Target every year.  read more

Jared Leto Not Joking Around About Suicide Spinoff

Suicide Squad was an insipid film at best. Jared Leto as joker filled those seats in the theater. And just like Hollywood to not issue an apology and refund, we got served with a spinoff.  read more

Suicide Squad Labeled Sexist

Suicide Squad is being universally panned by critics which is odd because they are usually completely fine with taking payoffs and telling you to go see some rancid piece of shit starring Anne Hathaway and Seth Rogen's left testicle. This movie must really suck. It's also... read more

Jared Leto Fairly Badass

Jared Leto might be an androgynous Scientologist drone who sees dead people but at least he can fucking do something. That's him in the front climbing a cliff in Yosemite. Being sober definitely has its benefits. If your lifestyle affords it, imagine how braindead and... read more

Jared Leto Can Name Up to Two American Immigrants (VIDEO)

Jared Leto was tasked with the obligatory awards ceremony ode to third world suffering felt heavily by wealthy celebrities because of how many foreign speaking nannies and gardeners they employ. Also, many of them are presently fucking Czech models. Leto read a note from... read more

Jared Leto's Stupid Hair And Shit Around The Web

Jared Leto cut his hipster Jesus hair and died it platinum blond. It's for an upcoming role he's playing in the movie Douche Bag. It goes on forever. Just when you thought Jared couldn't get any douchier. (Huffington Post) Hot girls, scantily clad, taking pictures in the... read more

Jared Leto Hawks Fannypack

Jared Leto posted a shirtless pic of himself wearing a fannypack, which conveniently contained a link to his merch page. On the site you can buy his dumb fucking hipster fanny pack for $32.00 or a photo book he made about Haiti or a poster which says "Sleep. Dream. Wake.... read more

Jared Leto As The Joker And Shit Around The Web

Hipster pretty boy Jesus Jared Leto will be playing the Joker in the new Suicide Squad movie from DC Comics. This officially proves there is no God and adults who read comic books should be chemically castrated yesterday. Read all about the upcoming shitburger of a... read more

Jared Leto's Cock And Shit Around The Web

Alexis Arquette, the tranny Arquette sister I guess, claims that he schlobbled Jared Leto's man parts and that it was wonderful. According to Arquette, Leto's dick was like something out of the movie Gladiator. I'm not sure what the fuck that means. Does it look like... read more

Jared Leto Grazes Sexy And Shit Around The Web

PETA named Jared Leto as its sexiest vegetarian of the year. Apparently vegans get moist before the emaciated effeminate Jesus look. It's all part of PETA's master plan to turn us all into a bunch of herbivore bait. Not me, PETA. I will eat you and shit you out like corn... read more

Venezuela's Government Hates Jared Leto

The crypto-Commie fuckers in the Venezuelan government think that Hollywood is out to get them. That's because a couple of times during last night's Oscars, Hollywood ceased auto-fellatio mode long enough to show support for anti-government protesters in Venezuela. There... read more

That One's Married, Taylor Swift

It probably surprised no one that Bono and U2 won a Golden Globe for their song from Mandela, just weeks after the guy died, but it's fun to pretend that Taylor Swift immediately found the lead singer at the Weinstein Company's Golden Globes after party on Sunday night... read more