01.08.2010 conan is seriously getting raped (not literally)

Variety says this morning that Jay Leno has accepted an offer from NBC to return to 11:30 for a 30 minute show, called ‘the Jay Leno Show’, focusing mainly on a monologue and one guest, and that the show will begin after the Winter Olympics in about 6 weeks.

Deadline Hollywood adds that NBC does have the right to be this god dam dumb if they choose.

NBC has the contractual right to start The Tonight Show as late as 12:05 AM, which it sometimes does for sports or news. So if NBC gives Jay Leno back the 11:35 PM slot, and calls it The Jay Leno Show, and keeps Conan on Tonight, the network incurs no penalties.

If Conan can live with this bullshit, he will move to midnight, but otherwise ‘the Tonight Show’ will be unchanged.

And Broadcasting and Cable reported last night that NBC can simply take Conan off the air completely and replace him with Leno if they want, they just have to keep paying him.

If Conan, rightfully, tells NBC to suck his dick, he can approach Fox who has no late night programming and ABC, who would have to move ‘Nightline’ and Jimmy Kimmel.

If Conan leaves or NBC decides to take him off the air, Leno will again host a one-hour “Tonight Show with Jay Leno”.

Jeff Zucker is the man to blame for all this. He’s skillfully fucked up in new and imaginative ways since being named Head of Programming in 2000, but this could be his masterpiece. Mostly known for his unique ability to never do anything right, NBC should of course fire him, then drag him outside and load him in a cannon and fire him into a wall, but instead they’ve prmoted him several times, eventually to CEO in 2005 and then to President and CEO in 2007. No one in Hollywood has been given this much as a reward for so little since Cash Warren got to fuck Jessica Alba.

Tags: conan o brien, jay leno |

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09.15.2009 Kanye really is sorry

Kanye West honored his commitment and appeared on the premier of the Jay Leno show last night, but before performing with Rihanna and JayZ he sat down and HOLY SHIT someone take away this dudes belts and shoelaces before he kills himself. I think its safe to say he really is sorry about crashing Taylor Swift at the VMAs.

Yeah, it’s been extremely difficult. I just — just dealing with the fact that I hurt someone or took anything away, you know, from a talented artist or from anyone, because I only wanted to help people. My entire life, I’ve only wanted to give and do something that I felt was right. And I immediately knew in the situation that it was wrong, and it wasn’t a spectacle or just — you know, it’s actually someone’s emotions, you know, that I stepped on. And it was very — it was just — it was rude, period. And, you know, I’d like to be able to apologize to her in person.

When asked if Kanyes public apology was sincere and enough that Taylor could forgive the horrible things hes done, Rihanna said, “is this all some kind of elaborate joke?”

Tags: jay leno, kanye west, taylor swift |

217 Comments

12.09.2008 STUFF FROM ALL OVER

JAY LENO IS MOVING TO PRIME TIME – In one of the more staggering Hollywood comebacks you'll ever see, Jay Leno has somehow gone from fired to promoted. He’s already been replaced as the Tonight Show host by Conan O’Brian starting next year, but now NBC has announced he will essentially be doing the same show in prime time, at 10:00 pm, 5 nights a week. His salary, rumored to be around 30 million a year, is expected to stay the same, saving the network almost 13 million dollars a week when compared to typical prime time programming. It also means NBC will have two hours of original programming a night, then three and a half hours of talk shows. My, what creative thinking that is. How do they do it! I'm gonna go pitch them a show called "Duck Pond". Basically we show a live shot from a duck pond for 60 minutes. I figure it can be on at least three nights a week, along with a Christmas special where we put the ducks in little Santa hats.

HAROLD AND MAUDE WANNA BE NEIGHBORS – Alex Rodriquez insists that he's not moving in with Madonna but the Daily News says she wants to buy him a house right next to hers, so it's pretty much the same thing. And by that, I mean boring.

SCOTT RUFFALO IS DEAD - Scott Ruffalo, the brother of actor Mark Ruffalo, died last night after suffering a gunshot wound last week. The two prime suspects, Brian Scofield and Shaha Mishaal Adham, turned themselves in to the Bev Hills PD yesterday. The good news is, I'm fine. The picture of health and vitality.

OPRAH IS A FAT COW – Oprah says she now weighs over 200 pounds, having gained 40 pounds in the last two years. She says, "I'm embarrassed … I can't believe that after all these years, all the things I know how to do, I'm still talking about my weight. I look at my thinner self and think, 'How did I let this happen again?' " and "I felt like a fat cow. I wanted to disappear." That makes two of us. Her closet must look like a sleeping bag display.