By brendon October 14, 2009 @ 5:40 PM
Well not really dumped. Not yet. But it sounds like she will be, because Jamie Kennedy is apparently nailing his ex girlfriend on the side. Fox News says…
“Jamie is still hung up on Shannon and has been telling her that,” says the source. “He also told her he had zero desire to go to the Tao event with [Love Hewiit], but Jen insisted they go together to put rumors to rest. Jamie decided he at least owed her that, so he appeased her and accompanied her to the event even though he’s pretty much checked out of the relationship.”
It sounds like Love Hewitt is not totally in the dark, however, according to Jamie’s pal.
“Jen knows things have really changed with them, but the public appearance is all part of her damage control plan. Unfortunately for her, it doesn’t seem Jamie is going to stay with Jen ultimately.”
This is a big story so I tracked Jennifer to a hotel in New York. I was tired of the lies. I wanted the truth. She said it was none of my business, and I said, “well okay then. I’ll just sit here and eat these donuts then.”
And then I took out a box of donuts. We both knew the stakes had been raised.
“What are you playing at,” she asked with a rage in her eyes.
I said, “Ooh nothin. Just having some … oops!”
And then I dropped the donut over the railing and down to the street below. It landed in an alley with a sickening thud.
She flinched a little and reached out to save the donut, but it was too late. The donut was gone. Then I took out another donut, a jelly with sprinkles, and threw that over the railing too.
“I’m a real butterfingers huh”, I said.
I put the box on the table between us. Two of the donuts were gone, it was too late for them. But ten more had yet to have their fate decided. I took another donut, a cinnamon dandy this time. I held it over the railing, then sent it back to hell.
“Why are you doing this?” she pleaded.
“Tell me what I want to know Jennifer”, I said as my hand went back to the box and hung over a chocolate bowtie.
I picked it up.
“Damn your black heart,” she said, then turned away and buried her face in her hands.
“What happens to this chocolate bowtie is up to you Jennifer. It can join the others in the trash, or…”
“No,” she interrupted. “Stop. I want to eat the donuts. I’ll tell you what you want to know.”
And, uh, well I forget what happened after that.
By brendon October 13, 2009 @ 12:11 PM
Hewitt! The answer is Jennifer Love Hewitt. An ass this big in Hollywood can only belong to one of two people and in this case it’s Jennifer Love Hewitt. There are other asses this big but technically those are on animals considered “livestock”. Other pictures that claimed to show an ass this size turned out to be drawings of a centaur.
By brendon September 17, 2009 @ 3:35 PM
Jennifer Love Hewitts head is on the cover of this months Shape magazine and let’s get one thing clear: I only care about me, and I’m very handsome so this doesn’t matter to me one way or the other, but if I were capable of human feelings such as compassion for others I would be outraged.
This bitch carries on all the time about “loving who you are” and “I look great I’m not fat”, then she blatantly lies about what she is and how she looks. If she’s telling people she’s a size 2, even as she clearly looks like hell, girls who are a size 6 must be ready to kill themselves. They must think they’re a monster.
Those bikini pictures in Hawaii were taken 6 weeks ago. Amputees don’t lose as many inches as she somehow did overnight for the cover of Shape. And the sidewalk candid’s are from 3 days ago. You’re not foolin me, big ass.
(full size side-by-side here. hq jump here)
By brendon August 04, 2009 @ 11:58 AM
Yesterday there were bikini pictures of Jennifer Love Hewitt playing basketball (here). Today there are more pics from the same vacation, this time of her playing tennis. In both she’s surrounded by a fence. It’s like being at a really crappy alien zoo. If it were the San Diego alien zoo, they would have Megan Fox with waterfalls and trampolines. This is like some dirty Alabama roadside zoo where a guy with three fingers feeds her by hand.
(10 more here. hq jump here)
By brendon August 03, 2009 @ 9:05 AM
Even though Jennifer Love Butter is a size 2, she’s always hiding her ass for some mysterious reason. Which is why, even though she spent the weekend in Hawaii with boyfriend Jamie Kennedy, these are the only pictures of her in a bikini. Kennedy went swimming, but she was busy “modeling”. Presumably for From The Neck Up Magazine because her other 95 percent is a complete mess.
Didn’t she used to have tits? No one part of her body matches any other. Skinny face, huge ass, thin legs. She’s just a bunch of different parts thrown together, like Frankenstein.
And I have no idea what the hell is going on here, but look at that poor bastards body language. He’s not hanging his head because he dropped something. Hot Sexy Roots just said, “Oh my God, you’re that guy from Scream. No way! Me and my girlfriends love you, you are so funny. What are you doing, are you here with someone?” And now he’s looking for some of that poisonous coral so he can stab himself in the heart with it.
(10 more pics here. hq jump here. source = fame)
By brendon April 16, 2009 @ 1:13 PM
I used to be skeptical that Jennifer Love Hewitt really lost 18 pounds like she claimed on the cover of Us magazine, but then they compared two older candid pictures taken from the front to one professional picture from the side. That shut me up good. I thought she had a big ass but clearly I was mistaken. I also thought she was getting shorter, but they compared a picture of her on the red carpet to a picture taken straight down from on top of a ladder.
And now I’ve been extra shut-up, because she’s in the May Maxim in some sexy new pictures. By sheer coincidence she hides her hips and ass in every single one, but now I just sound ridiculous. The witch hunt is over. Her diet and exercise program have left her thin as a rail, clearly. Look, when you’re wrong, you’re wrong. Time for me to look myself in the mirror and face the facts.