For years I’ve been sitting here, like a fool, assuming there was always just one, but as ‘The Bourne Legacy’ repeatedly points out, it’s actually quite the contrary. And unrelated to the fact that the old one doesn’t want to be in these movies anymore, here are the adventures of another one who, it turns out, has been even more exciting the entire time and we didn’t even know it.
And don’t worry; even though the old one is referenced 6 times, perhaps giving the impression he’s in this movie, he’s not and good riddance.
But don’t take my word for it, just listen to the lady who saw the evaluations. She’s seen dozens, no, hundreds of evaluations, and she almost came in her pants when she saw these. “The old one punched like some limp wristed little faggot compared to this one,” she practically said.
There have been rumors that Jeremy Renner is gay for at least two years now, and he’s never really said much about it, but now he tells the Hollywood Reporter that the whole thing should really be private. And that he’s not gay.
“I want my personal life to be personal, and it’s not f—ing true,” he says of the (gay rumors). “And I don’t care if you’re talking about things that are true, you’re still talking about my personal life. How about I go peek in your window? How does that feel?”
Not very good, Jeremy. I didn’t like it at all. But it’s a good transition to these pictures of him through a window with some girl at Mel’s Drive-In on Sunset. Is he on a date? Maybe he’s not gay. I’m sure there’s a reason to hang out with girls other than the potential for sex but I can’t seem to think of one.
The trailer for ‘Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol’ will premiere in front of ‘Transformers: As If It Matters Because These Are All The Same’ starting tomorrow night, but an early bootleg copy has leaked onto this French website for reasons that are probably explained in French.
If this is any indication, it seems (the great) Brad Bird was more than up to the task in his live-action directorial debut. Tom Cruise is doing wildly dangerous stunts (really), there looks to be more Simon Pegg this time, with plenty of Josh Holloway being handsome and Jeremy Renner poised to take the franchise over starting with ‘MI:6′. It also promises “Re-pensez L’Imposible”, which sounds appropriate.
Two years ago most people had no idea who Jeremy Renner was. Two Academy Award nominations later and he’s starring alongside Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol (then is expected to take over the franchise and star in MI:5), in The Avengers as Hawkeye (which could get it’s own spinoff movie), and now the always great Latino Review says he is the choice to take over for Matt Damon in the new Jason Bourne movies that are not actually Jason Bourne movies.
…the offer to topline “The Bourne Legacy” is about go out to Jeremy Renner.
The new movie will simply take the title from author Robert Ludlum’s book, but will not use the story. Gilroy has also made it very clear that the new film is not a reboot or a recast or a prequel, and that no one’s replacing Matt Damon. There will be a whole new hero, a whole new chapter and that this film is a stand-alone project.
It’s interesting that Renner is getting all these leads in action movies considering the rumors about him being gay. A former acting coach of his said it never used to be a secret, and taking his mom as his date to the Academy Awards (two years in a row) hasn’t helped.
He’s a great actor so no one should give a shit but Hollywood doesn’t exactly have the greatest history here. Normally the only fight you’d see in a movie with a gay actor would be at a shoe sale with him snapping his fingers in a circle and then closing his eyes and scratching.
Tina Yothers Christina Aguilera is not only fat and ugly these days, but she’s also a lush who crashes parties and passes out drunk in strangers beds too. I’m honestly surprised there’s not a part in this story where she pisses on herself.
Popping up uninvited at Jeremy Renner’s 40th birthday bash on January 8, Aguilera, 30, got “wasted” then lay down in the star’s bed, a source tells the new Us Weekly.
“Someone comes and tells me she’s in my room,” (Renner told friends). “I run up and open the door and I’m like, ‘Um, hi. What are you doing?’ She just starts slurring. Her boyfriend was rubbing her back. Who comes to someone’s birthday party that they don’t know and gets in their bed?! My parents were there!”
Adds another source, “Christina was a mess at that party. She acted like a fool. Her boyfriend was shushing her and telling her to go to sleep.”
It’s too bad that she’s not hot anymore, because then the answer to the question, “Who comes to someone’s birthday party that they don’t know and gets in their bed”, would have been, “That girl covered in my semen, that’s who.”
JON MAYER – went on tumblr and said the Huffington Post is “full of shit”, in a 463 word response to a 150 word story that implied he might be back together with Jennifer Aniston. Maybe he overreacted, but let’s see someone blab that you’re dating that fug bitch and see how you like it. (tumblr, huff post)
JEREMY RENNER – has won the lead opposite Tom Cruise in ‘Mission: Impossible 4′, directed by Brad Bird, which will begin production in the fall and film in the U.S., Vancouver, Prague and Dubai. Cruise is expected to star in ‘M:I 5′ as well, but after that the franchise may be handed over to Renner. Actually you can bank on it, because if there’s one thing Hollywood is good at, it’s making long range plans and sticking to it. (deadline)
MATT DAMON – was back today filming scenes for the new season of ’30 Rock’ (which finally got good last year) and Sherri Shepherd posted a picture of them with Tracy Morgan. Damon plays a pilot who dates Tina Fey, while Shepherd plays the last thing a pound of bacon ever sees. (twitpic)
SOPHIE MONK – is in Hawaii in a bikini, which is more than enough to make the page on a day this incredibly slow. Seriously did you see that Matt Damon story? WTF was that all about? (pacific coast)