Jessica Simpson definitely seems pregnanant

By brendon October 25, 2011 @ 12:43 PM

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Though she still hasn’t made any kind of announcement, Jessica Simpson once again looked very pregnant yesterday New York. Either that or she’s learned to unhinge her jaw like a python and swallowed a pig. To be honest both theories seem equally likely.

(source = bauer griffin)

Jessica Simpson is pregnant

By brendon October 24, 2011 @ 10:03 AM

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Jessica Simpson has yet to officially confirm that she’s pregnant, but she was at LAX yesterday in a bodysuit and it seems safe to say she’s officially pregnant. And considering she went to the Chilis inside the airport yesterday, she’s clearly already said fuck it. It will be great to watch how fat she gets. I bet the answer is, “very.” By January she’ll need a jet pack just to get off the toilet.

(source = bauer griffin)

is Jessica Simpson pregnant or not?

By brendon October 14, 2011 @ 10:41 AM

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Jessica Simpson was out in West Hollywood yesterday, and it’s still not clear if she’s pregnant. I hope she is because we’ll absolutely see her out with a carriage one day and she’ll leave it in the rain and come out and it’ll be full of water, and there will be a goose in there swimming around and squirrels washing their food in it. This chicks an idiot.

(image source = inf)

Jessica Simpson is or is not pregnant

By brendon October 10, 2011 @ 4:28 PM

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Jessica Simpson has yet to confirm or deny the rumor that she’s pregnant, but she landed in New Orleans last night and the photo agency who took these pictures said she was. So there you have it. That’s all the proof I need. The only question now is when will she have a second one, and will the daily liter of Axe body spray her doofus fiance no doubt wears affect the baby?

(image source = flynet)

Jessica Simpson has postponed her wedding

By brendon September 28, 2011 @ 5:25 PM

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Just yesterday Life and Style told us that Jessica Simpson was all excited about being pregnant with her fiance Eric Johnson, and thrilled that she’d have time to get married before the baby came. But now Us magazine says she’s put her wedding on hold. Is it because of the baby? Is there trouble with the prenup? Do all the potential wedding dresses cover up her tits for some reason? Let’s read more and find out!

“Everything is up in the air,” a source tells Us. “She can’t figure out what kind of day she wants. Some days she wants a big wedding in Hawaii, then other days she wants something closer to home.”
But some of the 30-year-old singer’s friends fear the delay is due to more than just venue indecision. “She was so gung ho about planning their wedding, and now she’s gone dark,” says a pal. “She won’t commit to a date.”

Well my sources tell me the delay is because Jessica can’t find a caterer willing to stuff a pig with another pig and deep fry it on a stick. “I want ma double piggy-sicle,” Jessica shrieked when asked for a comment.

Jessica Simpson is pregnant! Maybe!

By brendon September 27, 2011 @ 4:01 PM

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In other news that a tabloid probably made up, Jessica Simpson is pregnant!

In Touch Weekly can exclusively confirm Jessica Simpson is pregnant!
“She’s already having kooky cravings!” a friend shares, especially nacho chips dipped in chocolate and cheese-flavored popcorn with non-alcoholic margaritas.
Luckily, she’s not due ’til spring, leaving them just enough time to be newlyweds before new parents.

This should go without saying but Jessica Simpson eating chocolate covered nachos is hardly proof that she’s pregnant. All it really proves is that you’re dealing with the real Jessica Simpson and not some impostor. When asked for a comment, Jessica pointed at her mouth and said, “Da food go in ma tummy!”

(image source of jessica and her fiance eric something at mastros steakhouse in LA on 9.13.11 = splash and fame)