Jose Canseco Is Single Again

Jose Canseco's fiancee Leila Knight dumped him because she realized she was engaged to Jose Canseco. Also he apparently threatened to kill her and it is widely assumed he has a clean gun: "My ex just threatened to kill me and my mom over and over and over and the cops came over. Can't wait to hear all the lies on his end." On a laundry list of Jose Canseco's negative attributes homicidal rage ranks near the middle....

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Jose Canseco Is a Rapscallion of Sorts

Jose Canseco's finger didn't actually drop off during a poker game in Vegas after all. Driven by a mix of steroids, an unbridled passion for attention, and what can only be described as a less than moderate level of aptitude, it's really impossible to know what this whimsical bastard will conjure up next. Jose claims he did actually shoot off his middle finger when cleaning his gun or trying to end his life or perhaps...

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Jose Canseco's Dead Finger And Shit Around The Web

A couple weeks ago Jose Canseco claims he accidentallyshot off his fingerwhile cleaning a gun, as happens to millions of Americans daily. He had the digit re-attached by some discount doctor and the finger fell off during a poker game in Vegas. It'll all be in his next hilarious autobiography, Funny Shit That Happened on the Way to My Rape Trial. How will he hold the 'roids syringe with only four fingers? (The...

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Jose Canseco Shoots Himself

Jose Canseco shot his middle finger off while cleaning his gun. Those Chuck Norris jokes were never really funny but few could top this true life saga. Canseco is known mostly for shooting roids and acting like a poor man's clogged colon years Elvis. It makes sense he would spend his retired life on the outskirts of Vegas banging ex strippers and cleaning guns in the kitchen while frying up a banana sandwich. When you...

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Jose Canseco Pulled Over With Fainting Goats In His Car

In case you're unaware, Jose Canseco, the godfather of steroids in baseball and oft-questioned suspect regarding sexual assaults in his neighborhood, maintains a small private zoo in his backyard. He claims the various caged animals are for personal amusement for family and visitors, but anybody peeking over the fence at 2am will see Jose in a Speedo and a lab smock perform all kinds of hideous Dr. Moreau like...

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What If Jose Canseco Was Your Dad? (VIDEO)

I'm always saying it's tough to be a celebrity kid, unless you're hot. I guess Josie Canseco falls into this category. Though an aspiring model, she's still like just sixteen or something. Imagine having your friends over to hang by the pool and there's rapey steroid dad in his Speedo. Just watch. Feel bad for Josie. Here's some of Josie's bikini pictures. With fucked up divorced celebrity parents and a remarried...

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Canseco Tweets Rape Charge Like a Dumbass

Everyone's favorite dickhead ex-baseball player Jose Canseco has once again shown why not everyone should have access to Twitter. He was Tweeting away idiotically this morning when the cops showed up at his house. It seems that Jose was a naughty boy and may have raped a girl in Las Vegas. Not only does he live Tweet the cops telling him he was being investigated on a rape charge, he also Tweeted the girl's name, a...

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