Wicked Hot Anorexics at The British Fashion Awards

By Lex November 24, 2015 @ 10:21 AM

Karlie Kloss And Jourdan Dunn At The British Fashion Awards
The fashion business is one massive ruse. It’s the equivalent of telling Jacksonville Jaguars fans that this is the year. That dress looks suspiciously like something already in your closet. I know you’re paying for it yourself, but I might note that I pay for my own clothes and our rent. The entire point of designer clothing for women is to make other women jealous for not being able to fit into that same dress. A Holly Holm foot to the face is more subtle. Men might tell a woman she looks great in a dress, but what they really mean is, let’s get naked and fuck. That’s also true for ‘how was your day’ and ‘of course I love Mr. Whiskers’. Relationships are complicated. Fashion isn’t. There are five different dresses in the entire world. You own fifteen of them.

Photo Credit: Getty

Jourdan Dunn Sideboob Overshadowed by GQ Style Awards for the Mens

By Lex September 09, 2015 @ 10:41 AM

Jourdan Dunn Wins The GQ Men Of The Year Awards LB

I don’t trust any man who tucks in his shirt without being ordered to do so by a referee. Being a slob doesn’t make you manly though being fussy and highly thoughtful over your wardrobe is dangerously akin to kneeling before a glory hole. Fashionable men do draw the attention of women, but the correlation between dressing GQ and getting laid isn’t nearly as direct as having a fat bank account, or driving a high end foreign sports cars, or kidnapping defenseless older or impaired women and bringing them back to your rape dungeon.

The GQ Awards invited a bunch of half naked female models and celebrities so the event felt less like a giant sausage fest of super well dressed sausages. Yes, of course I love women and tits, oh, boy, do I love tits, is that Armani you’re wearing? Fabulous shoes. Where are the women and their tits again? I can’t stop staring and wanting to fuck them all the time. Tell me that suit’s not vintage? Fuck, who has an e-cigarette? My cover is blown.

Photo Credit: Getty

Jourdan Dunn Was Fired By Dior Because Her Small Boobs Are Too Big

By Travis July 02, 2013 @ 11:00 AM

Jourdan Dunn is a 22-year old British runway model who was supposed to be appearing at yesterday’s Dior couture show in Paris, but two things got in her way of that happening – her big, ol’ boobies. Except, at 32A, her breasts aren’t exactly crushing any beer cans, yet they were still big enough to get her booted from fashion show’s lineup.

Dunn Tweeted about her cancellation, proclaiming her sarcastic love of the industry that gives her money to walk in a straight line and look like someone just kicked her cat. But she also admitted that this was a nice change from when she’s normally fired for being black, to which guys everywhere replied, “Can’t we just keep this about your tits?”

(Photo Credits: WENN.com)