Justin Bieber Sweet Digs

Justin Bieber lives in this dope Tony Stark futurama mansion. It comes with four bathrooms with cocaine already railed out on the porcelain counter tops. While I am waking up and tappingmy thermometer this motherfucker has his hyperbaric pressure regulated to the nearest thousandth degree celsius. It also has one of those machines that tongues your butthole and a trash compactor and hover board. The rent on the place...

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Justin Bieber Sincerely Apologizes (VIDEO)

There's some kind of quiet dignity in being a colossal dick. An arrogant ass who doesn't give a fuck about anybody but himself and how he's feeling from moment to moment. Not those small time punks who piss and moan. I mean one ginormous a-hole who fucks everything he pleases, pisses on his sycophants, and reminds you how he can buy you several times over. Justin Bieber. It wasn't noble, but it was definitely...

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Justin Bieber Seems Confident Enough

Justin Bieber isn't the first douchebag to pose for himself in the mirror in between sets at the gym. He's just the one small enough for me to ridicule. Vanity is every bit as natural to the human condition as taking a dump. Most people flush. Bieber is that special flower who has to admire his own ringlets of perfection. At some point the workouts and the tattoos and ordering of the big-ass bodyguards won't be...

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Justin Bieber Begs To Be Roasted

Justin Bieber reached out from his pit of despair and Ferraris to Comedy Central to ask to be roasted on their recurring celebrity takedown specials. Most people agree to go on the roast because it's great publicity and shows you can take lots of dick jokes about yourself. Justin Bieber wants the barbs to prove to the world he's changed. According to every press release put out by his public relations team, he has...

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Justin Bieber Pecker Threatens to Sue

Justin Bieber's lawyers are threatening to sue a website comparing his teeny pre-Photoshopped dick to a real one.His Calvin Klein ad generated some attention because he looked abnormally jacked for a boy. The two photos tell conflicting stories, but I'm prone to believe the one which shows a normal and scrawny prepubescent guy and not Ellen on steroids. Well, Ellen on even more steroids. It's certainly possible the...

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Bieber's Painted On Pubes And Shit Around The Web

Lesbian troll doll Justin Bieber had to have his pubes painted on with Photoshop in his Calvin Klein underwear ads. At least that's what Calvin convinced him as he also explained to Justin that Photoshop involved Calvin using his fingers and body paint. Fuck, I just gagged. Read all about Bieber's pubic lies. (The Superficial) Charisma Carpenter topless? Why, yes please! (Egotastic) Paris Hilton paid 25k for a dog...

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JustIn Bieber 2014: A Year of Assholery

Sometimes you get to hating on somebody for so long you have to stop and ask yourself, why did I ever hate this person in the first place. It's times like these I recommend a solid year in review of asshole photos of Justin Bieber. May we never forget. Photo Credit: WWTDD Archives [gallery id="2573"]

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Justin Bieber Toady: Worst Job in the World (VIDEO)

We've all had shitty jobs.I once had a job cleaning up vomit. They couched it, but that's what it was. I'd take that again any day over followinga tinybrat around and pretending he's the shit. Justin Bieber isn't the world's worst skateboarder, he's just the only one that has his entourage set up a perimeter for him outside Madison Square Garden so he can show off his tricks. The dudes on his payroll have to pretend...

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Justin Bieber Defiling Stephen Baldwin's Daughter

Nothing says your work with the Lord isn't being properly rewarded on Earth as when your eighteen year old daughter is taking the Bieber peen. Maybe Stephen Baldwin takes it as a test of faith. Like when the tax authorities come to your door with handcuffs because Jesus told you render zilch unto Caesar. If I found out that twat was taking my teen daughter on his jet to shmear at altitude I'd find murder in my heart....

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Justin Bieber Got a Jet For Christmas

In the spirit of the season, I'm solidly behind Justin Bieber bragging about the new jet he got for Christmas. Why drop tens of millions on your own personal aircraft if you can't brag about it. It makes everybody else's Porsche look really fucking weak. There are only three real ways to be gangster. Beat a man to death with your rings, ass fuckNicki Minaj, or buy yourself a G6. Bieber quickly identified his only...

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Justin Bieber's Dad Seems Like a Dick Too

Justin Bieber's internationally recognized homosexual procreator Jeremy Bieber is being accused of throwing a dog off a balcony as you would expect. Bieber and his Creed fan father bought the dog but never trained it since they are jointly selfish and dumb. The dog bit Justin's younger brother and Bieber Sr. threw it off the balcony of the condo that his son bought for him against his will. Some animal rights guy...

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Justin Bieber Continues Spiritual Quest

Justin Bieber met with a rabbi for three hours because those guys are really nice and generally bored and will talk to anyone for three hours or a year. He then hopped in a Rolls Royce and went to Spago like a guy in an 80's movie who hits it big when his rich uncle dies. Bieber's manager is appropriately Jewish and Bieber says he now says a Christian and a Jewish prayer before he performs to the culturally bankrupt...

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The Day the Music Died

Justin Bieber's half-life is rapidly degenerating, as he is currently in seclusion on a religious retreat which might actually just mean rehab. His mission is to learn to spread the Word of God. Some pastor is coaching him through his spiritual enlightenment and probably trying to blow him on the side. Bieber has recently distanced himself from friends and associates which merely meant telling everybody he wasn't...

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Bieber The Preacher And Shit Around The Web

Lesbian recording artist and also just artist Justin Bieber has found Jesus and wants to preach the word. He claims he's giving up the drugs and sex and possibly even the fighting like a pussy. I have no problem with the sinners turning saintly, but we still need to martyr the punkish little ones. The power of Justin compels you! (TMZ) Catherine Heigl explains why Shonda Rhimes (and everyone else) thinks she's a cunt....

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Bieber Got Some Splaining To Do And Shit Around The Web

Lesbian midget doll Justin Bieber is being summoned back to Argentina regarding his entourage beating people up in a nightclub. I can't wait for him to get put in an Argentine jail where he will meet Jesus... a big hairy dude named Jesus. Read all about Bieber being The America's Most Wanted. (TMZ) Bored moms everywhere will be flicking their beans to the new Fifty Shades of Grey trailer. (Huffington Post) Sara...

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