A Fatwah On Bieber's Music And Shit Around The Web

Several Muslim countries have banned Justin Bieber's latest album. Not because it sucks donkey balls but because he apparently talks about Jesus on it. I'm not Muslim but I can respect a Jihad on that lesbian troll doll's songs. Inshallah all nations will also ban him. (... read more

Justin Bieber Not Done Yet

Justin Bieber bleached his hair blond after asking the gilded mirror on his wall how to look like an even bigger asshole. You don't have to listen to the mirror. Or identify as a Latvian twink. Sometimes prostitute preemies turn out just fine. Not most of the time.... read more

Justin Bieber Guppy Tears (VIDEO)

It remains unclear why Justin Bieber broke down in tears following two shitty songs performed with harness at the MTV VMAs. Some are suggesting it was a stress induced menstrual gush. But he's a boy, dammit! As Bieber tilts his head forward in his hand the show producers... read more

Justin Bieber Cupping

When I heard Interview magazine was releasing photos of Justin Bieber cupping, I feared pictures of a hairless Gimli holding some unsigned rapper's junk in his little baby hands was coming next. This might actually be worse. Bieber joined in the line of voodoo health... read more

Bieber Sorry For Ass Shot

Justin Bieber apologized for posting a shot of his ass on Instagram. Not for the reasons you'd think like it's obnoxious and he's accepting payouts from an overseas gay porn site, but apparently one of his friend's daughters saw it, which is by far the creepiest possible... read more

Don't Cry For Me Justin Bieber And Shit Around The Web

A judge in Argentina has issued an arrest warrant for Justin Bieber. It's because of an assault charge from last year. If there is a God that walking shit-eating grinwill end up in an Argentine jail getting plowed by a guacho. Read all about Justin's latest troubles. (... read more

Justin Bieber Doinking Kendall Jenner And Hailey Baldwin

The lovable little fucktard smurf is through with the mea culpa nonsense and now intent on banging every decent looking celebrity daughter in Hollywood. If you're angry because you're short and your mom's a whore and she was the better parent, why not use your baby wang... read more

Ludacris Is Prudent

Ludacris is pissed because he does not approve of jokes that were made about Paul Walker at the Justin Bieber Roast and apparently lobbied Comedy Central to edit them out because he believes people give a shit what he thinks: "I was told and promised that they would edit... read more

Bieber's Buddy Charged

Lil Twist, who has wrecked Justin Bieber's car and thrown unsanctioned parties at his house, has been charged with six felonies including burglary, grand larceny, and being named Lil Twist. Twist was crashing at Kyle Massey's apartment, who is a Disney channel child... read more

Bieber's Egging Victim Gets Greedy

Justin Bieber's neighbor Jeff Schwartz has already received $80,000 for damages from eggs being thrown at his house which is slightly above market value. How much does a Brillo Pad run these days? He's now going for a cool million, alleging emotional distress and damage... read more

Justin Bieber Good People

Justin Bieber is being sued by the neighbor whose house he egged. It is unclear if Bieber indeed spit on the guy or if Bieber's bodyguard hurled anti-Semitic insults at him and his little daughter as the lawsuit alleges. Either way, this was all supposed to be taken care... read more

Justin Bieber Stoned Cold Roasted

Comedy Central filmed their Justin Bieber Roast over the weekend because they needed the money. A bunch of athletes and rappers and comedians who've never met Bieber roasted him with generic sex jokes primarily regarding Selena Gomez. They also invited Martha Stewart... read more