Behold The Justin Bieber Piss Video

The video absolutely no one was waiting to see, Justin Bieber pissing in a cup in jail, has been released onto an unsuspecting world. The video was taken during Bieb's arrest for being a drunken douchenozzle in Miami a few months ago. People, who I guess want to desperately see his dong, clamored for the video of him taking a piss test to be released. The judge ordered the video edited and a black bar to be placed to...read more

We Won't Be Seeing Bieber's Dong On Police Video

The judge in Justin Bieber's Florida DUI case will allow police surveillance video of Bieber in jail to be released with one catch: his dong has to be blacked out. You'll recall that the lesbian hobbit was arrested a while back for drag racing and driving while fucked up on anxiety meds and weed. The footage in question is of the fun times had inside the jail the night of the arrest. The objectionable part of the...read more

Justin Bieber Pays His Dad A $50,000 Allowance

Justin Bieber celebrated his 20th birthday with friends and family in the Bahamas, and that included his dad, Jeremy Bieber, who has always seemed like the kind of guy who would much rather be Justin's best friend than the guy who raises him. Now, Jeremy's former best friend, Cory Bernier, has opened up to the Daily Mail on what kind of a douchebag Jeremy really is, accusing the 39-year old of being a manipulative and...read more

Bieber Faces the Music

Justin Bieber is facing his haters with love and a shitload of attorneys. The twink pop star has chosen tostand trial for his DUI arrest in Miami. The prosecutors had offered the diminutive Canadian a plea deal where he'd get off with standard celebrity justice: probation and random drug tests. Justin reportedly told those Sunshine State hosers to piss off, aye. Presumably that drug testing part might prevent him from...read more

Georgia Pre-Hates Bieber

It looks like Atlanta doesn't want Justin Bieber living in their fair burgh. The residents of Atlanta's ritzy Buckhead neighborhood dropped their umbrella'd cocktails in horror when it was reported that the Canadian flea was looking at properties in the area. It seems that folks around them parts don't cotten to a carpet-baggin', sizzurp drinkin', car racin', wigga' livin' in their neighborhood. Folks haven't been...read more

Is Bieber Heading To The ATL?

Justin Bieber is reportedly looking for houses in Atlanta, GA. The tiny tyke has been seen searching for manors in the more desirable parts of the Southern metropolis. Hotlanta has long been considered a mecca for hip hop bad boys with a love of drinking cough syrup cocktails. Being a short black rapper with mediocre talent and a hardcore OTC medication habit is all Bieber has ever wanted to be.He is Bizzle now, after...read more

Justin Bieber Changes His Name To Bizzle

The famous Canadian lesbian not named kd Lang has changed his name to Bizzle on Instagram. In the grandiose tradition of Diddy, Prince, and Baby Doc Duvalier, Bieber wants to be known by a cool nickname. Bizzle came to mind.He's probably doing it to distract us all from his multiple arrests and escalating drug problem. I'll tell you right now that I'm not calling this motherfucker Bizzle. I'm going to call you by the...read more

New Bieber Egging Video Emerges

A new video has emerged in which you can hear Bieber during the now infamous egging on his neighbor's house. The incident occurred a while back when Bieber and his loser buddies pelted his neighbor's house with eggs supposedlycausing $20,000 worth of damage. You can't see Bieber in this video but you can sure hear someone threatening the neighbor in Bieber's high pitched screeching weasel voice. Police also have...read more

Bieber Hotboxed an Entire Plane

Justin Bieber hotboxed his way to the Super Bowl last week on a private jet. The little lesbian ferret rented a Gulfstream jet to take his posse of Misfit Toys, his lovely dad, and a whole lot of weed from Toronto to New Jersey. The plane was so full of marijuana smoke that the pilot had to use an oxygen mask to keep from getting fucked up. Bieber and his dad also berated the lady flight attendants to the point where...read more

Justin Bieber Popped Selena Gomez's Cherry

According to the world's tiniest recording star, he was the veryfirst to boldly go in Selena Gomez's sacred vagina hole. Justin Bieber was apparently boasting about this feat recently to his posse of Misfit Toys. The deed was done back in 2011 when the two 5'3" teen divas were first dating. Biebs begged her to let him put his Canada in her Texas. The couple flew down to Palm Springs where gay people and randy seniors...read more

Justin Bieber And His Little Buddy Share A Suckle

Lesbian teen minstrel, Justin Bieber, and his equally diminutive drag racing buddy, Khalil Amir Sharieff, shared a stripper's fake tits in an L.A. recording studio. I guess Bieber was feeling pretty manic after laying down some legendary audio tracks so he ordered up a plate of hooker nipples for he and his Lollipop Guild lieutenant to gnaw on. Justin is a biter, which you know the hookers dig because who doesn't want...read more

Rob Ford Defends Justin Bieber

Toronto's crack smoking and vagina diving mayor Rob Ford defended Justin Bieber on a morning radio show. Ford, who was stripped of a lot of his powers as mayor of Toronto for hitting the pipe and drinking more than even most Canadians, was on the Sports Junkies show in Washington D.C. when the subject of Justin Bieber came up. The wacky DJ's said that the little lesbian pixie was Canada's worst export. Ford fired back...read more

Justin Bieber's Toxicology Report Is In

Bieber's toxicology report is in for his DUI bust and it is not going to help his case. The 60-inch long crooning turd was arrested last week for a DUI and drag racing in Miami beach. There were rumors that he wasn't actually impaired and that the cops just busted him because he's poor and black, but those reports turn out to be bullshit. Bieber was high on weed and a bunch of pills. The toxicology report states that...read more

Justin Bieber's Swaggy Jail Tour Continues

It's getting pretty hard to keep track of Justin Bieber's police troubles, between his DUI and drag racing arrest in Miami and the Police Squad episode that features the LAPD building a case against Bieber for egging his house, but we can now add assault charges in Toronto to the list. Last night, Bieber turned himself in to the Toronto PD in regard to a December 30 incident with a limo driver. Justin is being charged...read more

Obama To Address Justin Bieber Deportation

I can't remember all the shit Obama promised as President. Just last night he promised a ton more shit. I believe I'm supposed to get laid more often and look a hint less like a beagle. I know Obama promised more openness and access for the Average Joe who can't pay fifty grand to shake the Presidential hand at Jeffrey Katzenberg's vegan-option soirees. Obama set up that idiotic White House petition process so that...read more