Justin Bieber Stoned Cold Roasted

March 16, 2015 | Photos | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Comedy Central filmed their Justin Bieber Roast over the weekend because they needed the money. A bunch of athletes and rappers and comedians who’ve never met Bieber roasted him with generic sex jokes primarily regarding Selena Gomez. They also... READ MORE

Justin Bieber Is Back

March 9, 2015 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

There’s no more loathsome bore than a recovering addict. Sharing is not absolution and I don’t want your amends. Just go away and come back when you’re wasted Tommy again. Thomas the Sober is a relentless asshole. I feel... READ MORE

The Biebs Manually Photoshops

March 5, 2015 | Uncategorized | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Some future food stamp recipients have been arguing on comment threads about whether Justin Bieber’s Men’s Health magazine cover is Photoshopped. Let me save you the trouble, who gives a fuck. It appears the photo is real yet Bieber is... READ MORE

Nickleback Hates On Beiber And Shit Around The Web

February 20, 2015 | crap around the web | editor| 0 Comments

Nickleback lead Singer Chad Kroeger attacked fellow Canuck d-bag Justin Bieber for being a d-bag too. There’s obviously no side to root for here except the very precise meteor because most of Canada still deserves to live long enough... READ MORE

The Comedy Central Roast Touts Its Own Demise

February 18, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

The entire point of a celebrity roast is to see who can get liquored up and deliver the most outlandish slams on their fellow drinking buddies. It’s a universally understood concept by any man who’s ever drank too much with... READ MORE

Justin Bieber Sweet Digs

February 2, 2015 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Justin Bieber lives in this dope Tony Stark futurama mansion. It comes with four bathrooms with cocaine already railed out on the porcelain counter tops. While I am waking up and tapping my thermometer this motherfucker has his hyperbaric pressure... READ MORE

Justin Bieber Sincerely Apologizes (VIDEO)

January 29, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

There’s some kind of quiet dignity in being a colossal dick. An arrogant ass who doesn’t give a fuck about anybody but himself and how he’s feeling from moment to moment. Not those small time punks who piss and... READ MORE

Justin Bieber Seems Confident Enough

January 26, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Justin Bieber isn’t the first douchebag to pose for himself in the mirror in between sets at the gym. He’s just the one small enough for me to ridicule. Vanity is every bit as natural to the human condition... READ MORE

Justin Bieber Begs To Be Roasted

January 22, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Justin Bieber reached out from his pit of despair and Ferraris to Comedy Central to ask to be roasted on their recurring celebrity takedown specials. Most people agree to go on the roast because it’s great publicity and shows... READ MORE

Justin Bieber Pecker Threatens to Sue

January 12, 2015 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Justin Bieber’s lawyers are threatening to sue a website comparing his teeny pre-Photoshopped dick to a real one. His Calvin Klein ad generated some attention because he looked abnormally jacked for a boy. The two photos tell conflicting stories, but... READ MORE