Kate Beckinsale’s Husband’s Girlfriend Seems Young

By Lex November 20, 2015 @ 12:51 PM

Kate Beckinsale's Husband Parties With C.J. Franco
Director Len Wiseman has been seen club hopping with self-described actress CJ Franco on his arm. His wife Kate Beckinsale has been off promoting the next Underworld shit in some Eastern bloc nation where you roll your own smokes. Assuming Wiseman knows paparazzi photos actually get published, it looks like their storybook marriage is over. Wiseman was directing the first Underworld when he ditched his then kindergarten teacher wife for Beckinsale who was about the hottest chick on the planet. It’s risky asking your man to get in touch with his feelings. He’s usually feeling like he wants to keep fucking barren 20-somethings. Maybe take a little break for Buffalo Wild Wings with the fellas. That’s the range. CJ’s going to need the Underworld Spandex suit when you get a chance. I heard her career fortunes just changed. You had a good run.

Photo Credit: Instagram

Nobody Wore Bras to the American Music Awards

By Lex November 24, 2014 @ 9:48 AM

Teens, old chicks, strange foreign chicks with pasties who nobody remembers inviting. All the girls went braless last night at the American Music Awards. After watching two minutes of sunken eyed anorexics talking fashion on E!, I discovered braless is a new style trend. I suppose it’s better than tiny hats. The Jenner girls don’t belong at a music awards show, but you ditch the bra and you’re on every short list, including the Cosby mentor program speed dial.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet

Kate Beckinsale Hawking London Apartments

By Lex November 07, 2014 @ 12:21 PM

Kate Beckinsale Wears Busty White Dress For Battersea Power Station Global Launch Party In LA
After thirty years as a dormant power plant serving mainly the interest of down low buggering in London, the Battersea Power Station is being turned into a bunch of upscale condos and shops right along the Thames. The developers have dispersed hot British chicks with nice breasts out like sales drones to fancy places around the world to tout the buying opportunity. When a place in my building opened up recently, my landlord was deciding whether $50 was too much to spend on an online ad for the unit. I’m assuming Kate Beckinsale with her tits showing costs more than fifty clams. When rich people with nice river views start dropping from airborne coal residue on the building site, a lot of barristers are going to get bloody rich.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet

Kate Beckinsale In A Bikini

By Lex August 23, 2013 @ 6:28 PM

Kate Beckinsale In A White Bikini Poolside Vacationing In Los Cabos
I’m not sure why the camera guys snapping pictures of celebrities in Mexico can’t get clearer photos. I think it’s got something to do with the tropical climate. Or maybe bribing the right local officials to get in normal lens range. For the right payoff in Mexico, you could get the police to bring a handcuffed Kate Beckinsale to an abandoned warehouse to shoot high res fetish porn photos. That price is exactly $600. Don’t try offering $400 for that service or you’ll get kicked in the face. A friend told me.

Photo Credit: Splash

Kate Beckinsale In A Bikini

By Lex August 22, 2013 @ 2:52 PM

Kate Beckinsale In A Bikini Poolside Vacationing In Los Cabos
I can’t look at hot moms wearing bikinis without thinking about all the hot moms in my neighborhood when I was a kid who refused to reciprocate or even acknowledge the very real and masturbatory feelings I had for them. But I vowed back in those days that I would grow up to be a man they could not ignore, a man of great accomplishment, a man of wealth and title who these same women would beg to take them. That or a really clever hypnotist.

Here’s Kate Beckinsale in a bikini at that Los Cabos resort where expensive lawyers for celebrities claim they have an expectation of privacy despite being photographed 100% of the times they visit there.

Photo Credit: Splash

its Jessica Biel at the ‘Total Recall’ premiere/senior prom

By brendon August 02, 2012 @ 12:05 PM


‘Total Recall’ had their big fancy Hollywood premiere last night, which doubled as a senior prom according to Jessica Biels dress. The theme was A Night to Remember, and all the tables had iridescent marbles in water as centerpieces. At the end of the night Kate Beckinsale signed Jessicas yearbook, telling her to never change, “remember cheer camp omfg”, and have a gr8 summer.

(image source = getty)