The very first picture of Suri Cruise hit the internet last night on the Vanity Fair website. The issue of Vanity Fair with a 22 page photo essay on Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes and their 5 month old daughter will hit newsstands in New York and Los Angeles today, the rest of the country next Tuesday. In the issue, Katie opens up about the pressure and scrutiny of the past few months:
"it's been heartbreaking (to see what's being said in the press about her family and her baby). Some of the crap that's out there, the stuff that's said about my parents and my siblings, it's really frustrating the amount of shit that's out there. And the stuff they say about Suri?! You shouldn't say that about us, and you can't say that about my child."
Well, actually we can. And it's your fault Katie. Only you two maniacs could make having a baby seem weird and suspicious. Suri is absolutely beautiful, but you've kept her hidden away like Anne Frank, so now even that's suspect. She's a little too beautiful. Her features are a little too perfect, like JackJack in a wig. She looks like she was born in a lab, and that's … oh … oh, okay, now I get it.
Almost five months after her birth to parents Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, the first pictures of Suri Cruise will be published tomorrow in Vanity Fair. The Daily Mail says:
The exclusive photos reportedly show baby Suri nestled against Tom's neck as he sleeps. Another is said to show Suri sleeping on the couple's bed, with Katie grinning at the camera.
If this kid doesn't have flippers and a forked tongue, I'm gonna be profoundly disappointed. Otherwise, what was the big damn deal. The Daily Mail also says that this will "dispel months of speculation that Suri Cruise does not exist". Umm, not really. Having your picture taken with something doesn't make it yours. I had my picture taken at the zoo one time, I'm pretty sure that doesn't make the commander of some panda bear army. Or does it…
Citing Tom Cruise’s increasingly strange behavior, Sumner Redstone - the Chairman of Viacom, which owns Paramount Pictures - said that Paramount was ending its 14 year relationship with Cruise. Paramount will no longer be the home of Cruise-Wagner Productions, the company Cruise founded with his manager that produced the three "Mission: Impossible" movies, "Without Limits", "Shattered Glass" and "The Last Samurai", among others. The final straw is thought to have come after "Mission Impossible III" performed beneath expectations at the box office. Many feel Cruises strange behavior and unorthodox beliefs were to blame. Redstone said:
“As much as we like him personally, we thought it was wrong to renew his deal. His recent conduct has not been acceptable to Paramount.”
I know everyone is gonna blame scientology for his insanity except Tom, but Tom better hope scientology is to blame. Otherwise he’s just a damn lunatic. If its not the scientology, then he was hit by lightning or has a grapefruit sized tumor in his brain pressing up against whatever it is that normally stops people from making a constant ass out of themselves.
