Kelly Brook In Lingerie Teasing Her New Calendar (VIDEO)

By Lex October 04, 2013 @ 2:32 PM

I think I must be getting old, because I’m starting to appreciate women in lingerie teasing the camera. There goes the promise I made to myself never think of a woman in any clothing, short of the high school cheerleader I was certain would let me take her in her uniform one day. I’m not sure she ever even knew my name though I’m quite certain she could tell by my smiles in the hallway that I was committing a sin of commission to thoughts of her. Fuck it, I’ve overshared. Here’s Kelly Brook teasing her 2014 calendar by writhing around in see-through lingerie. So if you’ve got the time or inclination, you can see her nips.

Kelly Brook Is Still So Happy And Brave

By Travis September 06, 2013 @ 9:00 AM

Kelly Brook attended the opening of the Pandora Oxford Street store in London last night, and just look at how happy and brave she is despite the fact that she recently found out that her boyfriend, Danny Cipriani, had been sexting other girls behind her back. Because that’s what happens when attractive models with huge breasts are cheated on and keep making appearances in public – we call them brave.

Meanwhile, guys who cheat on attractive models with huge breasts? We call them fucking morons. Of course, unless the girl he was cheating with was an even more attractive model, in which case we call him brave. I’m pretty sure that’s how this whole thing works.

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Kelly Brook Continues To Be So Brave

By Travis August 13, 2013 @ 11:00 AM

Women are cheated on by their douchebag boyfriends and husbands on a daily basis, but there are only so many hours in a day to try to pretend to care about all of them, so we’ll just stick to the women who pose for calendars and show off their large breasts. Like Kelly Brook, for instance, who recently found out that her boyfriend, Danny Cipriani, had been sexting with at least six girls behind her back.

But look how brave Kelly is for going outside today and smiling. It’s almost as if she knows that people don’t give a crap about Danny as long as she keeps posing in bikinis for a living. Stay strong, Kelly.

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Kelly Brook’s Man Cheats On Her, There’s a Lesson Here Somewhere

By Lex August 08, 2013 @ 11:48 AM

Professional male athletes are as stupid and horny as the rest of guys, they just have an easier time finding the girls to be stupid and horny with. Danny Cipriani plays rugby, which I’m told is a real sport in England, and he was really boning model Kelly Brook and they were engaged or some other celebrity term for married. But Danny just couldn’t be content with knocking around with a big-titted hot model, he had to go Carlos Danger and have a half-dozen girls with naked pictures sending him messages to his secret cell phone. Kelly found the phone (because women always find the fucking phone) and quickly dialed up the women using that stupid British ring tone and chewed them a new arsehole. She told them they were all just empty holes to Danny and they “were all slags and some were motherly’. You can guess what ‘slag’ means, and by ‘motherly’, she did not mean sweet and nurturing.

The lesson here is that men who can get lots of women will get lots of women. I think that’s actually an axiom or something. It’s the same reason chefs are fat and narcs are dirty. The temptation plus access equation has never been cracked throughout human history. You want a boyfriend who every girl wants to bang? Go for it. Just lay off the revenge phone calls when the inevitable occurs. And, please, don’t tell me how your dad was super handsome and he never cheated on your mom. He did.

Kelly Brook In Lingerie For Nuts Magazine

By Lex July 16, 2013 @ 11:35 AM

Kelly Brooke In Lingerie For July Issue Of Nuts Magazine

Photo Credit: Nuts

Kelly Brook Is A Very Talented Actress

By Travis July 03, 2013 @ 11:00 AM

Having already turned in supporting roles in Hollywood classics like Piranha and Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo, Kelly Brook is ready for leading role status now, as she’s starring in a short film entitled, Taking Stock. It’s a play on words, you see, because she plays an aspiring actress who plans to rob the grocery store that she works at, so it’s already more clever than other stupid movies with boring titles like Iron Man or Philadelphia.

Kelly was filming in London yesterday, but as I look at some of the photos from the set, I’m a little confused. When does the wind storm hit and make all of her clothes fly off? I guess they don’t want to spoil it.

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