Kelly Osbourne Burns Her Dad's Hairdresser

When you desperately need to be in the news, you can't go wrong with outing the hair dresser who let your dad rub his flaccid cock up against her smock after a blow out.read more

Kelly Osbourne Pisses Off Latinos And Shit Around The Web

Ozzy's spawn Kelly Osbourne said something racist to talk about how Donald Trump is racist on The View. She basically said Latinos are only good enough to clean toilets. In other news, Fuck Kelly Osbourne. This is one Latino who ain't cleaning her shit. (TMZ) April summers wears nothing but gold paint. (Egotastic All-Stars) Gigi Hadid in a black bikini top. (Drunken Stepfather) This is all about Nina Agdal's booty. (...read more

Kelly Osbourne Quit

Kelly Osbourne finally quit the E! channel's riveting dry snatch klatch, Fashion Police. Osbourne decided to take a stand against not particularly offensive teleprompter comments read by her dancing Sinbad skeleton show partner, Giuliana Rancic. Last week Osbourne insisted that Rancic power up up with a Diet Shasta and issue an on-air apology to the not black girl who was offended by not racist comments about her not...read more

Kelly Osbourne Tug Boat

Kelly Osbourne remains a mystery. A not particularly fetching woman without particular skills who seems to make numerous work place demands. Osbourneis threatening to leave Fashion Police if the racist air is not cleared regarding Giuliana Rancic's not racist comment about Zendaya Coleman's fake dreadlocks at the Oscars. You could ask why the zaftig hobnobberhas inserted herself needlessly in the middle of this fake...read more

Kelly Osbourne Always A Lady

Kelly Osbourne shot back at people on Twitter who saw her on thered carpet at the Grammys and assumed she is pregnant because she looks like a pregnant chick with the baby dad whowill reveal himself and tell everybody how wasted he was. Osbourne cleared up she is not expecting anything but a shitload of backstage cold cuts, but not before reminding everyone she's adisgusting pig: "NO IM NOT PREGNANT YOU FUCKERS! I...read more

The Osbournes Coming Back To MTV

Sharon Osbourne announced she and her shockingly still alive husband will be reprising The Osbournes for an eight episode run on MTV. They probably don't need the money so this is more of a legacy project, like how Ted Bundy killed that extra hooker because he felt he owed it to people. Sharon says part of the reason for the reboot is Ozzy can't remember the original series since he was drunk the whole time, which is...read more

Kelly Osbourne's Close Call With Being Interesting

Kelly Osbourne has her size lumpy panties in a twist because she had to talk about something other than her cunty clothing line on The Today Show. Osbourne was informed she would be questioned about Joan Rivers because a dead Joan Rivers is still more interesting a living Kelly Osbourne. The two became close while working on VH1's Fashion Police, where they would often talk about the possibility of doing better shows...read more

Kelly Osbourne Seems to Be Doing Well

When you tattoo the word 'stories' into your skull and start dating a dude with a beard it's a sign that your fourth rehab probably isn't holding. I guess there's not much you can really do as parents and friends other than to tell Kelly to wear knickers for when she next falls down in the gutter outside a bar. Nobody ever had the decency to give Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan the same sagely advice. Kelly's cute teen...read more

Kelly Osbourne Tells Lady Gaga to 'Eat My Shit', Gaga Considers

At some point years ago Kelly Osbourne had the bright idea to call Lady Gaga a butterface. Yes, we all see the irony. Lady Gaga's carrot-brained junior scouts swore vengeance on Ozzy's booze and food addled daughter and called her a fat cow and talked about burying her in the desert and other Internet anon pleasantries. In the latest lame shot across the bow, Lady Gaga had the nerve to show off a birthday cake she got...read more

Hey, Down Here. Check Out Kelly Osbourne's Boobs

Not much has worked for Kelly Osbourne looks wise. But if there's one solid fall back, it's show your tits off like you really mean it. A scraggly looking dude with a giant shlong can't really just let his mega junk hang out at an evening affair to keep people from noticing his face. A woman has a distinct advantage in this regard. Every single man left that event thinking, damn, Kelly Osbourne has some big yabbos....read more

Kelly Osbourne Hires Fat Naked Scary Painted Woman To Make Her Look Pretty

The day you stop fighting the tide and start to go with the flow is the day you're officially grown up. Kelly Osbourne has been hanging out with hot actresses and models her entire young adult life trying to fit in and all it's got her are substance abuse, mysterious seizures, and whatever the fuck happened to her hair. Now Kelly's got a smarter plan. Instead of being pictured alongside sexy fashion models that make...read more

Kelly Osbourne On The Cover Of July Cosmo

Kelly Osbourne is really fucking happy. You'd be happy too if you just found out you lost 18% of your body fat thanks to Photoshop. They also made her look slightly less like an unsuccessful Berlin prostitute from the 1980's. Then they painted on the real smiles. Photo Credit: Cosmopolitanread more

Kelly Osbourne and Lady Gaga Get Ugly

If you're a person who routinely Googles 'ugly girl lame fights' then you're probably already know that Kelly Osbourne and Lady Gaga have been feuding the past year. I think it has something to do with whose face haunts the nightmares of more grade school children. The fugly girl fisticuffs simmered down recently, but, Kelly Osbournetakes a fresh shot at Lady Gaga in the new edition of Cosmo: "I totally believed in...read more

Kelly Osbourne Helps Relaunch a Magazine

It's all the rage for guys to make fun of Kelly Osbourne's look. But you really need to get past the superficial and look at Kelly on the inside. That's where she keeps all the good drugs and booze. Here's Kelly looking stunning in her own special way at the CLEO magazine relaunch in Australia. Photo Credit: Bauer-Griffin, WENNread more

Kelly Osbourne In A Bikini

Shit, I wish Kelly Osbourne would stop making me feel bad for her. Between the seizures and the addictions and her parents and her tragic desire to fit in with hot actresses and models, I almost found myself getting her a sympathy card at the local CVS. But the irony of heading to the same aisle where my last four girlfriends have bought me 'I'm Sorry But I Found a Bigger Boyfriend' card featuring a picture of a sad...read more